WHAT SHOULD I BE DOING INSTEAD OF THIS?
 
 
by Jac Kern 10.10.2014 15 days ago
at 10:03 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)
 
 
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There's a Fake John Matarese Twitter Now

@John_Mattress is really funny

If imitation really is the greatest form of flattery, WCPO's John Matarese should feel truly honored. Someone has created a parody Twitter account, @John_Mattress, devoted to Mr. Don't Waste Your Money. Like the real Matarese, fake John offers penny-pinching tips, like this helpful idea:Who runs the account and why it only has 7 followers remains a mystery. The account's first post is dated Aug. 27, but we just discovered the page when "John" recently tweeted @CityBeatCincy.Follow @John_Mattress for real Matarese retweets, money saving pointers and video game musings. Seriously, one of the funniest parody accounts we've seen in a while. Here are a few of our favorites:Are you @John_Mattress? Know who is? Please email any details to letters@citybeat.com.
 
 
by Amber Hemmerle 03.07.2014
Posted In: Commentary, Culture at 02:07 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)
 
 
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Trending Topics

Cincinnati's most buzzworthy tweets of the week

Each week our intern Amber will be exploring what Cincinnatians are interested in by scouring the local Twitter trends and reporting on what she’s found. From serious tweets to goofy hashtags, she’ll highlight what Cincy’s been buzzing about. So get to tweeting, folks. #RAW This is a wrestling reference hashtag. I’m sorry, but how was this trending and not Bates Motel? I am ashamed of you, Cincinnati. I know they are both scripted, but at least Bates has good acting and an awesome plot. FYI: Norma Bates did start trending though, thank god. In this week’s episode, Norman visits Ms. Watson’s grave way too much, Norma makes a scene at a city hall meeting and Bradley blasts some guy’s head off and ends up in Norman’s bedroom asking for his help. Poor Norman, surrounded by all these crazy bitches. All you WWE fans better get hip to Bates Motel. Xavier Muskie fans were blowing up their newsfeeds expressing their frustration after Monday night’s game when they lost to Seton Hall 71-62. Monday’s upset left many fans complaining about wasting their last Hopslam and chugging too much wine. On top of all the frustration, Matt Stainbrook went down with a knee injury and left the locker room on crutches. Better luck next year? Maybe. #PLL I actually watched some of this show, Pretty Little Liars, for once. Awkward used to be my Tuesday night show (don’t judge me), but since Jenna and the crew are AWOL until next season, I figured I’d give this show a shot since I was apparently the only female in Cincy not watching it. I am a few seasons behind, so I don’t really get all the drama and who I should love/hate yet, but not a bad show from what I’ve seen so far. The season finale is Tuesday, March 18 at 8 p.m. on ABC Family. #19HSHysteria If this just isn’t confirmation that Cincinnatians are obsessed with their alma maters, then I don’t know what else is. Fox 19 set up a March Madness style bracket of all the high schools in the area and launched a Twitter competition. I’m reppin’ the Newport Wildcats, who already lost in the first round to Simon Kenton. Voting for the North bracket is going on now until midnight tonight. Ukraine I saved this one for last for a reason. Ukraine was trending all week. I haven’t been keeping this blog for very long, but nothing has ever stayed trending for an entire week before, as long as I’ve been keeping track. I also saved it for last because honestly, I don’t know what to say about the crisis in Ukraine. I guess it’s good that people are taking to social media for such a serious matter, but most of the people tweeting about it seem more clueless than me. I do know that most Americans want our government to mind their own damn business and do something about those crazy fucking Russians. Also trending: Oscars, World Cup, #LiesToldByFemales, WCW (can this one just die already,) Taco Bell, #Scandal and The Lakers.
 
 
by Amber Hemmerle 02.28.2014
Posted In: Culture at 12:13 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)
 
 
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Trending Topics

Cincinnati's most buzzworthy tweets of the week

Each week our intern Amber will be exploring what Cincinnatians are interested in by scouring the local Twitter trends and reporting on what she’s found. From serious tweets to goofy hashtags, she’ll highlight what Cincy’s been buzzing about. So get to tweeting, folks.  #SK2K Sean Kilpatrick became the second player to score 2,000 career points at UC during the Bearcats’ game against Louisville on Feb. 22. The only other Bearcat who tops his record is Oscar Robertson, "The Big O," whose career points totaled 2,973 by 1960. Fans from Cincinnati and beyond were showing their love for Kilpatrick all over Twitter on Sunday. #DaleJr As in Dale Earnhardt Jr., the superstar of NASCAR. Earnhardt won the Daytona 500 for the second year in a row and as part of his celebration, he finally decided to create a Twitter. In 10 hours, the racecar driver accumulated over 450,000 followers — 515,000 by Wednesday and 526,000 by Friday. I’ve had my Twitter for years and I’m barely pushing 200 followers. Anyway, who says NASCAR is only for the Southern folk?  Texas  A judge in Texas voided the ban on gay marriage in the state this week. An outpour of support for the judge’s decision was evident throughout the nation. Following suit in equality, an Arizona judge vetoed a bill that would allow businesses to refuse service to the LGBT community due to their “religious rights” being violated. Of course, Cincinnati also made moves toward a more equal community when announcements of a domestic partner registry for same-sex couples were made.  #Reds Thursday was the start of spring training for the Reds. The boys took the win, 8-3 over the Indians, in the Cactus League Opener. It doesn't matter if you think Homer Bailey's extension is a total waste or that Joey Votto should have won the Face of MLB competition, one thing we can all enjoy is the sweet sound of Marty Brennaman’s voice and the memories of warm weather it has brought with it for the past 50 years.  #NewOscarCategories You know I had to do at least one funny trend. People just made up categories that should be in the Oscars: @Weinheimerandy: Tyler Perry presents the Tyler Perry Oscar for best performance by Tyler Perry.@startpuking: Movies so bad you yell, Sharkeisha! No!@MnightShelton: Best Seth Rogan film in a non-Apatow production Also trending: Stiles, #WatchingTop13, Taco Bell, #Scandal, Penn State, Son of God and #BBN.
 
 
by Amber Hemmerle 02.21.2014
Posted In: Commentary at 04:38 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)
 
 
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Trending Topics

Cincinnati's most buzzworthy tweets of the week

Each week our intern Amber will be exploring what Cincinnatians are interested in by scouring the local Twitter trends and reporting on what she’s found. From serious tweets to goofy hashtags, she’ll highlight what Cincy’s been buzzing about. So get to tweeting, folks.  #TheWalkingDead Either you love it or you hate this zombie show — but if you hate it, just keep your stinking mouth shut. Seriously, though, now that football is over, it seems like Sundays are devoted to TWD in Cincinnati. New characters and old ones constantly dying off either give viewers something to look forward to or break their hearts each week. I think everyone can come to a consensus that Lizzie is a little, um, psycho. Plus, three new characters, from the comic, were introduced last week. What are you looking forward to in the next episode? #NationalDrinkWineDay Tuesday, Feb. 18 was National Drink Wine Day. According to NationalWineDay.org the purpose of the day is to spread the love and health benefits of wine, so I’ll drink to that. If you celebrate wine every day, like me, check out these local wine events: WineStation Wednesdays: Free, every Wednesday from 4-7 p.m. at The Wine Merchant.Wine Tasting: Free, every Friday from 4-8 p.m. at DEPS Fine Wines.Saturday Afternoon Tastings with David: $10 monthly through July 2014, Noon-5 p.m. at Water Tower Fine Wines.Cincinnati International Wine Festival: $40, 5:30-6:30 p.m. March 8 at Duke Energy Convention Center. Bode Miller Trending, not necessarily because of his performance, but because of the emotional post-race interview he had with Christin Cooper. Miller’s brother, also a skier, passed away in 2012. Cooper pressed him with questions about his win and his brother, even after he shed tears. Where do you draw the line and become a person again instead of fishing for that next great quote? There were people arguing both sides; some say she was doing her job and others believe she went too far. As someone studying in this field, I think she was doing her job. See the interview here and decide for yourself. Miller, however, did not blame Cooper, tweeting: Brit Awards Lorde won International Female Artist, Bruno Mars won International Male Artist and David Bowie won British Solo Male Artist. There might not have been any Miley moments, but they did have some fabulous fashionistas in attendance from the States. Queen Bey made that green gown her bitch and Katy Perry glowed, literally, during her performance of Dark Horse. The one thing that the Brit Awards does have on us: Awesome English accents. Cheerio! #MisheardLyrics Jimmy Fallon started this brilliant hashtag. You’ve done it too: Thought a song said something, belted it out and got funny looks from all of your friends. Trends like this are just fun: “Dirty deeds, Dunder Chief…”“Got me feeling so fried like a cheese stick…”“Excuse me while I kiss this guy...”The entire Kidzbop version of “Thrift Shop” #JoeyVotto Votto was in the running to be the Face of MLB Competition, but was eliminated by Felix Hernandez of the Mariners by a margin of just .8 percent. Votto was the reigning champ from the 2013 in the Twitter competition, but fell short this year. Although Votto might have lost, Reds fans can rejoice in the fact that Opening Day is now less than two months away. Voting continues on Twitter if you are interested, click here for the bracket. Other trending topics: MVP, True Detective, Tornado Watch, #GhettoJeopardy, UNC, #USAvsCanada and Winter Jam.
 
 
by Amber Hemmerle 02.07.2014
at 01:29 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)
 
 
twitter-whale-css-illustration copy

Trending Topics

Cincinnati's most buzzworthy tweets of the week

Each week our intern Amber will be exploring what Cincinnatians are interested in by scouring the local Twitter trends and reporting on what she’s found. From serious tweets to goofy hashtags, she’ll highlight what Cincy’s been buzzing about. So get to tweeting, folks.  #PunxsuatawneyPhil So it’s official: There will, in fact, be six more weeks of winter, according to Phil, the Groundhog’s Day spokes-rodent. For one, I never knew the groundhog had a name! He has even been on The Oprah Winfrey Show, but most people in Cincinnati are probably ready to go find and kill him after the weather we've endured. I am cool with winter and all, but it’s really sad when 30 degrees feels warm. As long as these six weeks don’t include another polar vortex, I think we’ll survive. #WorldCancerDay I know it seems like every day is a day for something. I could probably live without Ice Cream Day or Chocolate Pudding Day (lord knows my thighs could), but this day of awareness, on Feb. 4, is one I can deal with. On World Cancer Day, people are asked to spread awareness and remember those who passed away fighting cancer or currently dealing with cancer. @TCSociety made a good point: “Remember that a moment of awkwardness could save a lifetime! Talk about Testicular Cancer.” Talk about breast cancer, pancreatic cancer, skin cancer, too, and go get checked, then get re-checked. It could save your life! #AddInMyPantsToAFilm Really? I don’t know if it’s sad or just funny that this was trending at #3 in the USA and #2 in Cincinnati this week. How these things get started and why so many people actually do it, I’ll never know. It does make for some comic relief at 3:30 p.m. on a Tuesday afternoon. Here were some that actually made me chuckle: Up! In My PantsGreat Expectations In My PantsThe Dark Knight Rises In My PantsClueless In My PantsA Series of Unfortunate Events In My Pants #CreationDebate Probably the eternal debate: Evolution vs. Creation. Honestly, I don’t care what you believe in. I just think it’s fascinating that the creation debate was not only trending in Cincinnati but also trending worldwide. The Bill Nye-Ken Ham showdown held in the Tri-state area accumulated 103,000 tweets just minutes following the debate. All this attention was focused on these two men at the Creation Museum, which locals all have access to every day. At the end of the debate, I’m sure not many people’s beliefs were changed and that’s OK. @ScienceGroen tweeted, “It doesn’t matter if you change your mind after the #creationdebate. The process of thinking about the universe is what matters.” I think he is right. People were interacting all over the nation because of this one event here and that is really cool. Maybe you learned something, maybe you didn’t, but I bet it had you thinking. DMX If you haven’t heard, the rapper DMX was selected out of 15,000 submissions to take on George Zimmerman in a "celebrity" boxing match. Nothing has been made official yet, but the announcement was made on what would have been Trayvon Martin’s 19th birthday. I wonder if this could help the victim’s family or if it would just make the mourning process even harder for them. And why is Zimmerman even being considered a “celebrity?” The man killed someone. Is it just weird that I think he should not be capitalizing on all of it? I vote for Zimmerman and Casey Anthony to box in a fight to the death. #HottestCollegeInAmerica The Cincinnati Bearcats beat the University of Connecticut on Thursday 63-58, which makes it their 15th straight win. I don’t know anything about basketball, so I’ll just say there was a lot of running, dribbling and shooting. The team is rising in the ranks of its division and momentum is high. School spirit is what being in college is all about, besides the whole degree thing. Whether you are a student, faculty member, staff member, alumni or just a fan, a sense of pride is among us. You don’t have to know anything about basketball to enjoy seeing a local team make sports headlines. Keep it up, fellas! Netflix I seriously couldn’t figure out why Netflix was trending, but as I began scrolling through all the tweets, I noticed something. There were a lot of single people dwelling on the fact that Netflix would be their only date on Valentine’s Day. There is nothing wrong with watching Netflix on Valentine’s Day — hell, that’s probably what I will be doing with a bottle of bourbon. Just remember, it’s only one day, it will be over soon and then it’s on to the next irrelevant holiday. Plus, if you don't have a date, you don’t have to buy anyone else a gift and you can buy yourself all the half-off chocolate you want the next day. If you are hung up on the fact that Valentine’s Day is quickly approaching and Netflix isn’t an acceptable date for you, here are a few single-friendly events to treat yourself to: Pretty in Pink at The Esquire A classic '80s night, what’s not to love? Dress up in your favorite pink prom dress or tuxedo and there will be a costume contest before the show! $7-$9.75. 10:30 p.m. at Esquire Theater. Southgate House Revival Three shows take place under one roof: Elk Creek at 9 p.m. in the Sanctuary, Hank Erwin at 9:30 p.m. in the Lounge and Hot For Alice at 10 p.m. in the Revival Room. Get some friends together for some live music and cheap drinks. Rosencrantz and Guildenstein Are Dead The story of “Hamlet” told from the perspective of these two quirky characters. $22-$35. 7:30 p.m. at Cincinnati Shakespeare Company. Other things that were trending: Phillip Seymour Hoffman, The Superbowl, #Bearcats, #PLL, #LHHNY, Sochi and The Olympics.
 
 
by Danny Cross 03.29.2012
Posted In: baseball at 02:28 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)
 
 
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Ranking Jose Canseco’s Global Warming Tweets

Former MLB meathead goes ROFL on Twitter

Former Major League Baseball player Jose Canseco doesn’t have the best image. After breaking into the majors as a super fast, freaky power hitter with the Oakland A’s and winning a World Series with his fellow Bash Brother/performance-enhancing-drug-user Mark McGwire, Canseco’s career and reputation were marred by injuries and a series of embarrassing moments on and off the field. In 1992, Canseco was traded to another team while he was in the on-deck circle waiting to bat. In 1993, a fly ball bounced off his head and over the fence for a home run — This Week In Baseball in 1998 named the incident the greatest blooper of the show’s first 20-plus years. Canseco then asked his manager to pitch in a game even though he was an outfielder, which resulted in an elbow injury that required surgery. During the PED witch hunt of the early 2000s, Canseco apparently took exception to MLB’s — and the media’s — obsession with how huge Barry Bonds’ body and head had gotten and released a tell-all book called Juiced: Wild Times, Rampant 'Roids, Smash Hits & How Baseball Got Big, in which he claimed that the majority of MLB players were on steroids. Since then, Canseco has generally been seen as a doofus who does silly things to maintain his celebrity and make relatively small amounts of money, such as participating in reality shows, claiming Madonna liked him more than he liked her and training for a mixed martial arts fight and then losing in 77 seconds. Canseco in the past few days has apparently attempted to rectify all his wrongs with a series of tweets aimed at schooling all the “morons” who don’t believe in global warming. It reads as a passionate, if grammatically flawed, cry for reason in the wake of the mass consumption and laziness that has led to the death of thousands of polar bears and, apparently, Al Gore. The following is a collection of the tweets, which have made quite an impression on the Twitter community, ranked in order of hilariousness. Be the first to receive future advice on world-changing lifestyle tips from Jose Canseco by following him @JoseCanseco.8. The tweet that got it all started — Canseco alerts the public that he is going to drop some serious knowledge about global warming the following day, likely using an aggressive tone. 7. While this tweet was certainly informative, the “reduce, reuse, recycle” motto has been known even by the laziest non-recyclers for a long time. The Playboy celebrity golf tournament reference is funny, though — classic Canseco. 6. “How do we stop global warming?” A relevant question, completely reasonable coming from someone like Canseco who probably doesn’t actually know the answer. 5. Here’s where Canseco starts really lashing into the skeptics, his frustration with mass consumption demonstrating a larger level of understanding of the issue, which likely surprised many readers. Canseco also introduces the concept of polar bears in this tweet, which is essential to later hilarity. 4. Ridiculously bad grammar aside, Canseco again makes a good point — in some countries families indeed share much less space than we use in America. The second reference to polar bears is really funny and for some reason unexpected. 3. Canseco in this tweet proves that he’s not going to let the issue of lazy, over-consuming humans fizzle out after a couple of liberal-esque polar bear references. Jose is now invoking the sacrifices of the pioneers, who didn’t use any electricity and just slept in flannel pajamas even when it was snowing. A pretty good point. 2. Jose Canseco thinks Al Gore is dead. 1. If Canseco is correct that lowering your body temperature at night will make you live 20-percent longer, then he’s probably well on his way to solving global warming. Energy savings aside, Canseco’s hope that he’ll live into his seventies rather than dying in some stupid way during the next 10 years is likely what led to this outburst of social consciousness.
 
 
by Hannah McCartney 11.08.2013
Posted In: Fun, Humor, Culture, Is this for real? at 03:22 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)
 
 
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The Many Twitter Faces of John Cranley

John Cranley had only a few unsullied hours of golden time on social media to celebrate his mayoral win on Wednesday before he became the subject of at least two Twitter accounts created solely to troll him, and they're worth a follow if you'd describe your sense of humor as somewhat to very immature or are still totally salty about Cran-man's victory. So far, we know of @CranleyVille and @MayorCranley, both of which have taken to creating alternate, highly egotistical and cartoon-like depictions of our new mayor. While whoever is behind CranleyVille clearly has more time on his or her hands (whoever it is tweeted 90 times in three days),  both provide some pretty amusing fodder for 4 p.m. on a Friday afternoon. Why social media has quickly taken to poking fun at Cranley in every way possible — or whether or not a Qualls victory would have brought something like an "Afghan Girl Qualls" to life — we'll never know. And while CityBeat holds a great deal of respect for the mayoral position and for Cranley, that doesn't mean we're not allowed to be immature and laugh a little bit. Oh, and here's the real deal, too.
 
 
by Hannah McCartney 10.24.2013
at 10:31 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)
 
 
cincinnati emigration

Study Finds Cincinnati Is Major Twitter Trendsetter in U.S.

Cincinnati only non-metropolis in top five most influential areas

Say what you want about our chili, but the Queen City is particularly savvy in the Twitter world, according to a new study from Indiana University. A social media study that sought to pinpoint geographic areas that most frequently are hubs for information flow found that ol' Cincinnati was among a couple of much larger, more metropolitan cities like L.A., New York, D.C. that often acted as Twitter "trendsetters" —  generating topics early on that eventually trend on a national level. The study found that most of those areas corresponded with major air traffic hubs, although it's tough to pinpoint whether that's because news travels so quickly across state lines at airports or because major air traffic hubs just tend to be in densely populated cities, where information already spreads more quickly because social media users tend to be closer and more connected. As we all know, Cincinnati's airport is nothing particularly special — in fact, it's so expensive, lots of locals even avoid it when they can — so that theory doesn't really jive for us. And our population hovering around 300,000 isn't anywhere near the monoliths who earned trendsetter status. Cincinnati earned the second spot just under L.A. as the most influential trendsetting geographic area in the entire country, followed by Washington, D.C, Seattle and New York. Washington Post blogger Caitlin Dewey hypothesizes our influence might have something to do with the city's fluctuating migration trends — we suffered a big population exodus from 2004-2010. Perhaps our emigrants just maintain really strong ties to the city once they realize they've left wonderful things behind like CINCINNATI CHILI.From the study:  Whatever it is, we're doing something right. You could share your guesses in the comments, but maybe you should just #tweet #it #instead.
 
 

Hate, with a Passion

0 Comments · Wednesday, October 9, 2013
 I feel some of the same vitriol expressed in many of these angry tweets. But it’s not that hard to resist the urge to publicly express irrational rage related to a sporting event. Especially so pointedly directed at a single person.  

Elvis Impersonators Gone Bad?

Plus, new 'Twitter #music' app is unveiled after celebrities get first dibs

0 Comments · Wednesday, April 24, 2013
After giving "tastemakers" (and Ryan Seacrest) a go at it first, the "Twitter #music" app finally makes its way to the public; an Elvis impersonator got into a 30-hour police stand-off in in Des Moines, Iowa, and another Elvis impersonator (who also apparently does an excellent Kid Rock as well) was in the news recently as a suspect in the send-poison-letters-to-the-President plot.   

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