by Jac Kern
Jac's roundup of pop culture news and Internet findings
The stoner gods have
answered our prayers by way of Taco Bell’s “first meal.” Now folks across the
country can start living mas as soon as they wake up, because everyone's favorite south-of-the-border fast food chain now
serves breakfast. Taco Bell giant unveiled the new morning menu with a
commercial that takes a dig at the golden arches:Taco Bell breakfast is
served 7-11 a.m. — 30 minutes later than McDonald’s, yet still too early for
their target demographic. When will fast food restaurants learn that the people
who really want to consume waffle tacos do not typically wake before noon?
Bill Murray can do whatever
he wants. He can crash your party, drink fancy champagne on the rocks and, now, raid
your dad's closet circa 1981.Yeah, he wore PBR pants to a recent golf outing. NBD.
Murray’s Coffee and Cigarettes co-stars and South
by Southwest buddies of
the Wu-Tang Clan are causing a stir with the release of their new album…which
apparently will consist of one single copy.
Of all the terrible reality
shows I relish in, I have never been able to get into The Bachelor/ette. I’m not sure what separates this piece of trash from
the heap of garbage I enjoy — it’s not like the materialistic, bratty children
in Botoxed old lady bodies known as Real
Housewives don’t perpetuate negative female stereotypes, but I enjoy shows
that are somewhat self-aware and poke fun at themselves, and The Bach just doesn’t do that for me.
So, any show in the vein of 2003’s Joe Millionaire
that misleads women who signed up for a TV dating show is a winner in my book.
In a new show coming to Fox, 12 women will compete for the affection of a man
they claim to believe is Prince Harry, despite what the smallest amount
of common sense and eyesight would prove — the dude’s just a redheaded
I Want to Marry “Harry” premieres this May. You know when the truth bomb is
dropped on these hoes they’ll be all, “How dare this television show
orchestrated to create ‘true love’ be
fake?!” But in the meantime we can ponder which is worse: a woman trying to
meet and marry a prince (of whom she’s obviously never even seen a photo) and
believing British royalty would dare be seen on American reality TV or a woman knowing all this mess is some
bullshit but riding that gravy train as long as possible?In what must be
the most fabulous robbery ever, three
people were arrested for stealing a replica pair of Dorothy’s ruby red slippers from The Wizard of Oz. The shoes were on
display in a Hilton
Garden Inn lobby (which is kind of rude). The trio has been released without bail
and is due back in court next month. If only clicking your heels got you out of
Vice Mayor and Los Angeles County Assistant Sheriff Todd Rodgers is running for
L.A. sheriff in an upcoming June election. Typically, county election campaign
coverage wouldn’t have a place in a pop culture roundup, save for maybe making
fun of an unintentionally funny low-budget ad. But those Hollywood types have
connections on the West Coast. If I lived in L.A., it would be important for me
to elect an official with not only celebrity endorsements, but a good sense of
humor as well. Therefore I’d definitely vote for Todd Rodgers, who last week
reunited (most of) the cast of Reno 911! for a series of TV spots.
Thomas Lennon, Kerri Kenney-Silver, Ben
Garant, Cedric Yarbrough, Niecy Nash, Carlos Alazraqui and Joe Lo Truglio all
suited up in their khaki uniforms for the occasion. While the videos haven’t
been released yet, you can see photos here.
You may be asking,
“Why would a serious candidate for sheriff seek out the cast of a Comedy
Central mockumentary?” or “Why wouldn’t he seek endorsements from actors on a
show that is still actually on the air?” or “Isn’t Reno in Nevada? What does
any of this have to do with a sheriff election?” The answers all lie in Lt. Dangle’s signature booty shorts. But seriously, Reno was filmed at Carson Station in L.A. from 2001-2006, where
Rodgers was a captain at the time, so the cast was actually familiar with him
and his work. We’ll take any excuse for a Reno
reunion, though. Vote for Rodgers!
And here’s Samuel
L. Jackson reciting some slam poetry about Boy
by Jac Kern
Jac's roundup of pop culture news and Internet findings
Real World is in its 28th season (!), which got me thinking about how the show has degenerated
over the past 20-plus years from a truly groundbreaking docu-series to just another
pseudo-reality shitshow with weird green-light PG-13 sex scenes. But remember Season Three
with Pedro? That season, filmed in San Francisco, dealt with AIDS in a mature
but relatable way when the disease was still misunderstood and extremely taboo. They all had real jobs. When some of the housemates when to mass, others engaged in different forms
of worship while the remaining roomies engaged in natural discussions on God and
religion. Sure, the early seasons lacked the naked three- (and four- and
five-)somes and catfights of The Real
Worlds to come, but I miss the real Real
World, where normal-looking people with average backgrounds came together
to work, play and explore a new city.Fast forward a couple decades to the current season, which takes place in
Portland, Ore. Funny, between Portlandia and
an as-mainstream-as-it-gets MTV show, this hipster capital of the world’s
coolness bubble is about to burst. But I digress. Portland is an awesome city
to transplant a group of 20-somethings for a couple months. It’s known for
being easy to traverse via bikes or public transport, the dining and nightlife
scene is bustling with offerings and you’d think there would be endless
festivals, arts, outdoorsy stuff and other events to keep you occupied for the
24 hours you’re being filmed each day. But no. These douchers have managed to visit
the same handful of neon-lit night clubs, sushi joints and SUBWAYS (pretty sure
it’s in their contracts to eat at least on six-inch sub per day) through the
past 10 episodes (…yet I still watch. I don’t know, I’m a masochist). Pictured: Rejected applicants from The Bachelorette, Survivor, Big Brother, Amazing Race, Bad Girls Club and Judge Judy.
I originally tuned in to scope the digs
(though the allure of the The Real World
space and home décor is starting to fade), see what kind of quirky job the
roommates would end up with (they all work at a normal pizza shop, except two
girls who were too inept to even bus tables; they serve frozen yogurt out of a
cart. I repeat, they’re in their 20s.), or find any other example of ripe
Portland weirdness. Last week, my watching finally paid off as Averey, Johnny
and Jordan attended a totally awesome overnight zombie survival course at
Portland’s Trackers Earth — and I think we finally got a glimpse at the real Portland. For the first time this season, the people in
the background didn’t look like extras from a Smirnoff Ice commercial!
Check out the full episode here.
Nathan Fielder, the comedian behind one of my
favorite shows to come this year,
is all about messing with people to get some laughs. Not so much Punk’d, but in more of a social
experiment sort of way, which was on display in his hilarious Comedy Central
show, Nathan For You. Perhaps he’s
warming up for Season Two, or maybe he just wants to ruin some lives — either way,
Nathan’s been taking to Twitter with some interesting was to prank people you
love, then show the world and laugh at them.
Back in April, he
encouraged people to freak out their folks with this text prank:
This week, he put
relationships to the tests with another “experiment”:
Here were some
The number of people who actually save pet names with Emoji icons in their contacts is disheartening.When in doubt, or if you don't have a significant other, always text mom.This prank actually happened for the best, in this couple's case. #bitchesbecrazy
Ya been caught!It’s been a hot
minute since we’ve gotten a song from comedy music trio The Lonely Island —
the guys behind “Dick in a Box,” “I Just Had Sex” and “Lazy Sunday.” They drop
their third album, The Wack Album,
Friday, with tracks including “3-Way,” featuring Justin Timberlake and Lady
Gaga, “YOLO” featuring Adam Levine and Kendrick Lamar and this new song
featuring Dance Pop princess, Robyn. “Go Kindergarten” makes fun of all those
stupid instruction club hits…while also being quite twerkable in its own right.
(Lyrics NSFW, if “whipping yo dick out” isn’t cool where your work.)
I really like, “So
raise your glass, then break the glass/Then stomp your bare feet on the glass.”
freaking out about this picture
of a Taco Bell employee licking taco shells that were probably then served to
customers. Am I the only person that thinks this is possibly the least unsavory
“Taco Bell: Exposed” type of thing? Yeah, pre-licked taco shells are gross, but
isn’t that a risk we all take when we take that late-night Taco Bell tango? At
least he didn’t lick all the nacho cheese dust off the Doritos Locos taco
Speaking of health and wellness, it’s bathing suit season and we at CityBeat have taken on a new
workout regime. Prancercise, bitches.
this either watched or heard about Sunday’s shocking, bloody and devastating
episode of Game of Thrones. Without
dropping any spoilers here (no promises in the links!), io9 collected some of
the best tweets about the ep.
I think I speak for all of us when I say fuck you, George R. R. Martin. Fuck
you very much, you heartless bastard.
Gold Medal tweet
Finally, I’m late
in the game but just started catching up on Hannibal. It’s so good! How is
NBC getting away with such a smart graphic show? Tune into that shit.
(Thursdays at 10 p.m.)
1 Comment · Wednesday, September 19, 2012
Americans download more music illegally than any other country (and we steal Drake's music the most), Passion Pit defends Taco Bell ad and the RIAA won't be bilking you for hundreds of thousands of dollars anymore (but others just might)
0 Comments · Wednesday, September 5, 2012
SUNDAY SEPT. 2: Carolyn Washburn, editor and vice president of The Enquirer, wrote a piece in today’s edition explaining the new look of the paper’s print edition. Washburn said the new look of the paper will be like the Weekly Reader newspapers you used to get in grade school, but with fewer pictures of animals.
Comedian Carlos Alazraqui's portfolio bursts with unexpected voice roles
0 Comments · Wednesday, August 22, 2012
The sixth annual Brew Ha-Ha is upon us. Saturday's headliner Carlos Alazraqui is probably best known as Officer James Garcia on Comedy Central’s Reno 911!.
0 Comments · Wednesday, June 27, 2012
The U.S. Supreme Court today said “hell
nah” to many parts of an Arizona law designed to fight illegal
immigration by racially profiling people. It wasn’t a total victory for
those who don’t love America and think a nation built by immigrants will
be ruined by them, as the court let a provision stand that allows
police to check a person’s immigration status while enforcing other
0 Comments · Wednesday, February 2, 2011
For most people, a visit to a Taco Bell restaurant is an infrequent occurrence, normally undertaken late at night after several hours of bad decisions (were you wasted or do you really believe there’s supposed to be a “fourth meal?”). As such, there’s generally little backlash when a menu item is accompanied by a surprise ingredient: “Dude, my burrito has Fritos in it … and it’s fucking delicious.”
0 Comments · Wednesday, October 21, 2009
There are some things that even the dumbest kid doesn't need his mom to tell him more than once: The stove is hot, scary movies aren't real and eating at Taco Bell will make you poop your pants. A new study hopes to put another surprisingly debatable issue to rest: whether hanging out in a room full of cigarette smoke is bad for the people who aren't even smoking.