We at WWE! wouldn’t know what it’s like
to be a firefighter — scared of heat, untrained in CPR, never helped
anybody ever. That didn’t stop today’s news of the difficult
philosophical question facing some of Ohio’s bravest public employees —
whether to force state Republicans to raise taxes on rich people or give
up their collective bargaining rights forever — from affecting us.
Everybody understands that historical facts can be difficult to remember — boring topics, long-lost cultures, people who thought dinosaurs were real, etc. That’s why it wasn’t a big deal when Republican presidential candidate Michele Bachmann incorrectly described a couple of Revolutionary War battles and confused Elvis Presley’s birthday with his death (what’s the difference — he’s in Heaven now with all the black people whose music he stole).
The superintendent of Cincinnati Public Schools, Mary Ronan, deserves a feather in her cap for providing the leadership that’s resulted in the district receiving an “effective” rating from the Ohio Department of Education. That once again makes CPS the highest-rated of Ohio’s eight urban school districts.
Barack Obama and John Boehner walk into a bar. The bartender says, “We don’t serve your kind in here … just kidding — what do you assholes want?” This stupid joke is a lot funnier than what actually happened when Obama and Boehner walked into a meeting room in an attempt to avoid a government default, only to walk back out and blame each other for walking away.
It’s rare that scientists are able to figure out exactly when an invasive species was introduced to an area — there is generally more than one person at a time who thinks it’s funny to see what a weird animal from Australia will do if you let it loose in your own neighborhood (probably get killed by cats, maybe eat a bird). The Enquirer today reported that one such not-so-local species — the European wall lizard — followed a different path to Cincinnati.
Anyone who frequents the downtown business district knows that certain local celebrations guarantee a less-than-diverse collection of visitors to our fair city (try yelling “Go back to Mason!” to random people at Opening Day, Taste of Cincinnati or Oktoberfest and you’ll be surprised at how many people think you know them).