WHAT SHOULD I BE DOING INSTEAD OF THIS?
 
 
by Hannah McCartney 11.13.2013
Posted In: Fun, Culture, Humor, Life at 03:00 PM | Permalink | Comments (4)
 
 
nipperts-snow-penis

Penis Sighting at Nippert Stadium

There was a 100-yard penis at UC yesterday and nobody told us about it

UPDATED 3:29 P.M. "This definitely puts Nippert Stadium in a hard place.""He just wanted to stick it to the man.""Hopefully the dean doesn't blow up in his face." — Staff writer German LopezUPDATED 3:28 P.M. "If that prankster doesn't keep it up, he might just get off with a warning." — Hannah McCartneyUPDATED 3:22 P.M. "You didn't say anything about this guy potentially getting caught and getting the shaft." — Staff writer German Lopez Snow angels are for rookies. And snow penises, evidently, are for University of Cincinnati students.Somehow the folks at Hypervocal and Uproxx caught wind of this before us because we spent all morning trying to fix our blogging system, but someone took advantage of Monday night's snowfall in a non-traditional way, if by non-traditional you mean drawing a humongous awkwardly and disproportionately-shaped penis on the field at University of Cincinnati's Nippert Stadium. According to the Hypervocal and Uproxx stories, a UC student took a photo of the public work of art and Tweeted the image, but deleted it later because she felt guilty about it . Of course, by then it was too late, and now it will live down in penis-themed viral web content forever. I want to make a lot of jokes about this, but Hypervocal and Uproxx have already had a BALL doing that themselves. No word yet if the student has been PENalized.
 
 
by German Lopez 12.19.2012
 
 
qualls

Morning News and Stuff

Qualls to push for federal gun regulations, UC to renovate Nippert, company rigs bid process

Metal detectors could come back to City Hall, but local legislators can’t do much more regarding local gun control. Still, Vice Mayor Roxanne Qualls and other City Council members will begin pushing for more federal regulations on guns starting today. President Barack Obama is already beginning to drum up support for more regulations on guns, including a ban on assault weapons and high-capacity ammunition clips. He also wants to close a loophole that allows people to buy firearms at gun shows without background checks. At the state level, a new bill loosening gun regulations in Ohio is facing criticism. The bill will make it easier to store firearms in cars and allows them for the first time in parking garages under the Ohio Statehouse and a nearby office tower. Gov. John Kasich said he will sign the bill.The University of Cincinnati is launching a fundraising effort for the renovation of Nippert Stadium. The project could cost as much as $70 million. The university wants to offset as much of the cost as possible to build premium seating, with the possibility of 28 new luxury boxes and more than 1,400 premium seats being added. Goals could change based on demand and fundraising efforts.A Cincinnati-based company and its top executive have pleaded guilty to circumventing Ohio’s competitive bid process. The actions cost Ohio taxpayers tens of thousands of dollars, according to Ohio Attorney General Mike DeWine. The company circumvented the competitive process by submitting multiple bids on road jobs under different names, creating the illusion of competition. Sen. Rand Paul of Kentucky, a possible candidate for the presidency in 2016, will headline a Hamilton County GOP event. He will be a featured speaker next month at the Northeast Hamilton County Republican Club's annual pancake breakfast.The Cincinnati College Preparatory Academy failed to follow its own compensation policies, resulting in improper over-payments of $2,325, according to Ohio State Auditor Dave Yost.Top state officials will begin pushing and outlining school safety efforts in the wake of the massacre at Sandy Hook Elementary School in Newtown, Conn. State Impact Ohio has a fantastic infographic showing the growth of charter schools in Ohio. In the Cincinnati urban district, charter schools now host 6,642 students.A new state policy will automatically refund businesses when they’ve overpaid their taxes. The first round of the policy will refund businesses in Ohio $13 million.The animal takeover continues. Due to the effects of climate change, some animals are moving into cities. On the bright side, animals can be pretty cute. Here is a dog flipping over its food, and here are cats locked in deadly combat against a printer.
 
 

Ending a Love Affair With Football

0 Comments · Wednesday, September 12, 2012
A funny thing happened to me during the first full weekend of football — or didn’t happen to me. I just didn’t care.   

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