For a band that is called fun., I sure find it ironic that their music sparks nothing close to that feeling. I admit comfortably that when I was 16, I was a fan of Nickelback, Disturbed and other bands that would fall under that “Cock Rock” territory. That’s a pretty bold statement. While I’d say that (most) of that fandom is long gone, I have been finding myself coming back to a lot of the bands the shaped my childhood and early teenage years. Yes, partly for nostalgia (although no amount of that could ever make me listen to Nickelback again), but I think this is mainly because I am finding more and more that I am losing my place in the ever-changing world of music, specifically alternative and indie music. Three years ago, I was always into the cutting edge of what is “now” — what many others and myself thought was good. I survived Arcade Fire’s The Suburbs winning Album of the Year at the Grammy’s, braved the great King of Limbs debate of 2011 and forced myself into thinking that a band like Chevelle actually sucked. I read Pitchfork religiously to stay on top of music’s latest and “greatest” new bands. I even pretended that I loved Bon Iver, but that fell short when it was revealed that for about a year I thought Bon Iver was one person. Sorry I’m not sorry Justin Vernon. Truth be told, I hate Bon Iver. I also think Neon Bible is a much better Arcade Fire album and even a Radiohead album like The Bends was better than King of Limbs. I think Chevelle kicks ass, but you’d never hear me say that out loud until now. I guess I’ll stop brown-nosing my ego and get to the point. I like music that is accessible and fun. No, not the band. My friends and I, “We Are Young,“ but if that’s your idea for a great indie party song, then your parties suck.   I use fun. as my main example, but this also applies to Mumford and Sons, Gotye, Imagine Dragons, Lumineers and others. I find my friends and acquaintances throwing it against the wall and, beyond my understanding, I’m seeing it stick. It might be just me, but I find these bands depressing. Not in an Alice in Chains “I’m a heroin addict and I don’t know how to stop ruining my life,” kind of way either, but more like a Simple Plan, “My girlfriend left me and now I can’t stop complaining about it” kind of way. Yes, I just compared Mumford and Sons to a pop-emo band from the early 2000s. There’s a difference between depressed and depression and these bands embody that very essence of momentary sadness that really doesn’t matter in a few months. Despite the very real and very dangerous depression of the guys who fronted Nirvana, Alice in Chains, Stone Temple Pilots, Butthole Surfers and several other bands during the ‘90s, the final product of that excessive drug use was great and often fun music to listen to. You don’t put a hand on your heart and shed a tear for Kurt Cobain when he screams out the lyrics to “Smells Like Teen Spirit.” Of course not! You crank it up to 11 and scream loud and out of key with the guy. Fun has become such a dirty word in alternative music and it’s not because of any form of stereotypical pretentious hipster nonsense. I really think the reason is, well…just because. I don’t think there’s a reason why Mumford and Sons’ Pop-Folk-with-a-Bluegrass-flare fusion is striking big, while Old Crow Medicine Show has been doing that for years.    What do I know is this: I miss when indie music was something new, exciting and fun to listen to. When I think of indie, I think of the playful lyrics like “We could go and get 40s” from the song “12:51” by the Strokes, the iconic bass line of The White Stripes’ “Seven Nation Army” and the voice-raising howls of “Wake Up” by Arcade Fire. I realize this is all personal interpretation, but indie music has become something of a boring passé before it even got old to begin with. Bands have no foreseeable longevity because songs like “We Are Young” will be replaced faster than you can say “something that I used to know.” Ha, see what I did there? And while Mumford and Sons have proven to have some lasting factor on modern music, I find their songs empty, repetitive and lacking any real expressiveness. I feel like I’m taking crazy pills. “Little Lion Man” and “I Will Wait” are the same damn song. They just don’t make good indie like they used to anymore, but then again maybe I’m getting too damn old for it anymore.  Anger, pain, jealousy and atheism, but tell me this song doesn’t get you going! I dare you!

Hurricane Sandy busted through the Northeastern U.S. this week like a good girl-gone-bad chasing after Danny Zuko. Thankfully, the worst of the weather has passed and we Americans can work on repairing damage, helping those in need and recounting evidence of how our country comes together during crisis. The hurricane-meets-nor’easter was revving up Sunday but meteorologist and (way too) frequent IJCGE reference Lindsay Lohan just wanted everyone to calm the hell down. I mean, hasn’t anyone else read The Secret? Don’t you people know the power of positive thought? Twitter became a useful source of photos and updates, as it often does in times of crisis, but unfortunately many of the messages and images tweeted were false or doctored (as they often are in times of crisis). Go here to check out some incredible popular images (and find out if they're real or fake). At this point you’re probably wondering when beloved superstar Coco is going to weigh in on the storm. Don’t worry, Mrs. Ice-T reported live from their New Jersey home: While Hurricane Sandy was ruining homes and shutting down electricity, the creators of The Jersey Shore continued their own assault on America. With the MTV hit ending after this season (not to mention the destruction of Snookie and Co.’s stomping grounds, the iconic boardwalk at Seaside Heights) 496 Productions has reportedly set its sights on Bengals cheerleader and teen-banger Sarah Jones for a new reality series. Cameras will follow the 27-year-old former teacher and her relationship with the now 18-year-old Cody York. Jones began an affair with York when he was a 17-year-old student at the high school where she taught. So, for the record, the woman cheated on her husband with an underage student and not only does she not get jail time or have to register as a sex offender, she will actually profit from it. Yes, I will obviously be watching this show. Since it is Halloween, check out these pics of the best Canadian bitch move in history, aka Sum 41’s Deryck Whibley and his girlfriend dressed as D’s ex, Avril Lavigne, and her current piece, Nickelback’s Chad Kroeger. (Most vomit-inducing sentence ever?) OK, enough destruction and anguish for one day. Enjoy this video of a pug hopping up stairs.