What should I be doing instead of this?

Resident Evil: Retribution

0 Comments · Thursday, September 13, 2012
The latest installment in the movie slash videogame world generated by Paul W.S. Anderson and featuring his wife Milla Jovovich finds the wonder warrior Alice (Jovovich) battling the Umbrella Corporation and its ever-expanding and perpetually mutating army of undead creatures.  

Stone (Review)

Robert DeNiro and Edward Norton team up in meditative drama

0 Comments · Thursday, October 28, 2010
Robert De Niro and Edward Norton have one previous team-up under their belt, 'The Score,' which wanted to be a thrillingly gripping caper but ended up being a crime because it criminally misused these two performers. So, like the hard-nosed wiseguys they are, De Niro and Norton try it again — and, of course, it's a crime uniting them in John Curran's meditative exploration of two men seemingly on opposite sides of the law-and-order divide. Grade: B-plus.  

Resident Evil: Afterlife (Review)

Even more 3D videogame gimmicks that have been done to death

0 Comments · Friday, September 10, 2010
Milla Jovovich returns once again to battle the insane viral infection that has transformed most of the human race into undead creatures, but this time she's bringing friends, including a battalion of butt-kicking clones, tough sidekick Claire Redfield (Ali Larter) and newbee warriors. This feels like zombiefied life after death, and I for one wish the genre would just stay dead. Grade: D.  

Blood Into Wine (Review)

Tedious documentary stretches itself too far

0 Comments · Thursday, April 22, 2010
The presence of Maynard James Keenan, frontman for Art Metal bands Tool and A Perfect Circle, is no doubt the only reason for the existence of 'Blood Into Wine,' a documentary that looks at his deepening interest in the art of winemaking. Keenan is a notoriously private guy, thus his involvement is both a blessing (gives it a higher profile) and a curse (he's not the most charismatic interviewee). Grade: C-.  

The Fourth Kind (Review)

0 Comments · Monday, November 9, 2009
While all of the promotional efforts leading up to the release of Olatunde Osunsanmi's movie seemingly wanted to capitalize on the similarities to 'Paranormal Activity,' the true kindred spirit for this tale of alien abduction is 'The Mothman Prophecies.' But Osunsanmi can't even generate the first, most basic kind of spooks Mark Pellington created in a simple phone call from beyond. Grade: D plus.  

A Perfect Getaway (Review)

Predictable horror thriller is a mindless trip

0 Comments · Tuesday, August 11, 2009
Honeymoon thrills detour down a sinister path for an eager couple (Steve Zahn and Milla Jovovich) in Hawaii as they encounter two other pairs, one of which might have murderously cruel intentions. Even the most brain-dead audience members will anticipate the twist in store. Grade: D.