WHAT SHOULD I BE DOING INSTEAD OF THIS?
 
 
by Jac Kern 02.12.2015 42 days ago
Posted In: TV/Celebrity, Music, Movies at 03:40 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)
 
 
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I Just Can't Get Enough

Jac's roundup of pop culture news and Internet findings

Comedy Central’s nightly “news” lineup is amidst a total overhaul with the recent end of The Colbert Report and the addition of The Nightly Show with Larry Wilmore. Stephen Colbert stepped down in December, and now The Daily Show’s Jon Stewart is following suit. The comedian shocked audiences at a Daily Show taping this week with the announcement that he’d be retiring from the show sometime later this year. While Colbert left to replace David Letterman as Late Show host (Letterman will step down in May; Colbert will take over in September), it’s unclear whether Stewart has another gig lined up, but it does sound like the show will continue with a new host. (The show originally featured Craig Kilborn before Stewart took over in 1996.) Amy Schumer stars in a new Judd Apatow movie and, predictably, it looks hilarious.Some previously unreleased Spice Girls songs hit the webz Wednesday, only to disappear from SoundCloud soon after. Could this be assign of another girl powa’ reunion?! Speaking of leaks, House of Cards’ third season — which does not premiere until Feb. 27 — was available on Netflix for about 30 minutes yesterday. No, Frank Underwood was not pulling a Beyoncé by releasing a full season unannounced. It was a “mistake.” A leak? More like the best House of Cards ad ever. Anyone who had momentarily forgotten about the upcoming season is now ready to binge the moment it premieres. It’s been a great week in fashion for models who don’t look like hungry baby aliens, which is rare. The Sports Illustrated swimsuit issue featured two plus-size models; “World’s Oldest Supermodel,” 83-year-old Carmen Dell’Orefice appeared on the cover of New You magazine; and Jamie Brewer, who many of us know from American Horror Story, walked in a New York Fashion Week show today, becoming the first person with Down syndrome to do so. Yay beauty diversity! And then there was The Grammys. The night’s program kind of reminded me of the Super Bowl half-time shows of the early 2000s, where the desperate attempt to appeal to as many people as possible resulted in a mashup of lineups that simultaneously featured Nelly, Britney Spears and Aerosmith. Between Lady Gaga and Tony Bennett and Jessie J and Tom Jones, there were lots of slow songs sung by duos of old and young people, which made it very easy to watch the 603 other shows on Sunday nights (Hey, Better Call Saul!) Sam Smith was the big winner of the night: Record of the Year, Song of the Year, Best New Artist and Best Pop Vocal Album all went to the magical songbird. Beck won Album of the Year and Best Rock Album (“Beck is still making music?” – everyone. Yes, he is. Morning Phase came out a full year ago). All those categories sound the damn same! Of course, since Beyoncé was also nominated for Album of the Year — and a bunch of other categories she didn’t win #salty — Kanye just had to, well, Kanye Beck’s acceptance speech, and Bey and Jay Z were definitely surprised I love Beyoncé’s subtle “No, Kanye, don’t...Someone stop him…” — which is basically the equivalent of “Somebody get a sponge!” — and Jay’s legit look of terror. Also of course, if anyone thought Kanye was taking a jab at himself by recreating Taylorgate, he wanted to remind them of what a real asshole he is by running his mouth some more after the show. And then other people responded to Kanye’s response and now I’m writing about it. Circle of life, folks. Highlights: Sia’s “Chandelier” performance with Kristen Wiig and Maddie Ziegler totally takes the cake as my favorite performance (and you know this is a serious claim when Queen Bey is in the picture). Kristen Wiig gave a soulful choreographed performance with the Dance Moms star — who would have guessed? GOOSEBUMPS. Beyoncé recreated her sister’s recent wedding with her performance of “Take My Hand, Precious Lord” It was Sunday, after all. Amen! Speaking of taking us to church, Hozier and Annie Lennox was my favorite collab of the night, performing the former’s breakout hit and “I Put a Spell on You.” Intoxicating! Pharrell traded his Arby’s hat for an old-timey child bellhop uniform and presenting a heavy performance of “Happy” And then it looks like Taylor Swift begged Jay Z to go to brunch with her. Awkward, especially when he finds out “brunch” is Taylor’s word for playing tea party with her cats while in pajamas. But judge for yourself. "Brunch." "Brunch!" "BRUNCH." See all the winners here.
 
 

He’s Never Heard of You, Either

Plus, They Might Be Giants restart 'Dial-A-Song' and car rental companies in Sweden might soon pay music royalties

0 Comments · Wednesday, January 7, 2015
After Kanye collab, a bunch of people jokingly ask, "Who is Paul McCartney?" triggering more than a few freak-outs, They Might Be Giants restart its Dial-A-Song project, where fans can call a number (or use other tech) to hear a new tune every day and a royalty collections company wants a Swedish car rental company to pay for having radios in its cars.  
by Nick Swartsell 10.31.2014
Posted In: News at 09:56 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)
 
 
Sen. Mitch McConnell

Morning News and Stuff

Enquirer's innovative new layoffs drive reporter exodus; petition circulated to name the Norwood Lateral after Carl Lindner; Kanye or Cruz?

Halloween is here. I’m taking an informal poll: how many folks are dressing up as Union Terminal and/or Music Hall tonight? I’m not knocking ya. I just wish I’d thought of that in time. Instead I have an Abraham Lincoln mask, American flag aviators, and a bow tie for a costume, so I will probably look like a very unappealing, election-themed male stripper. Procrastination is lame, folks.These are painful times for the Cincinnati Enquirer. A reorganization has been happening for a while now, but recently, news broke that a number of newsroom veterans are leaving the paper, including No. 2 in command Laura Trujillio and social issues reporter Mark Curnute, whose stories I've always been impressed with. Over the past couple months, employees have been asked to reapply for their jobs under new, more digitally-oriented job descriptions. That's definitely ruffled some feathers, and has caused the biggest shake-up in the paper's history. The departures probably have something to do with the fact Gannett brass have been wrapping layoffs at the Enquirer and other papers in the disingenuous corporate speak of an exciting new opportunity to create "the newsroom of the future", but who knows?• Right now the Ohio Department of Transportation is having its Southwestern Ohio town hall meeting on the future of public transit in the state. In Lebanon, because everyone knows that is the absolute hub of public transit in the region. You can watch the proceedings live here if you’d like to follow along at home. It’s standing room only there, maybe because I spread a rumor that there’s an ODOT party bus shuttling folks to some killer Halloween parties right after the meeting. That’s false, as far as I know. • You’ve probably already heard about the controversy over a proposal by outgoing State Sen. Eric Kearney to change the name of State Route 562 from the Norwood Lateral to the Barack Obama Norwood Lateral Highway. I bet you can guess some folks’ reaction to that idea. Norwood Mayor Tom Williams doesn’t want a name change, but did throw out another, much different suggestion: naming it after Norwood-raised business magnate Carl Lindner, who died in 2011. Williams called Lindner, who owned Chiquita, Great American Insurance, and a number of other businesses  “a beautiful individual” and said the several times he got to hang out with him were “an absolute thrill.” Hm. Maybe let’s just keep calling it the Norwood Lateral. • More than 400 people in eastern Ohio were forced to leave their homes this week after a fracking operation there began leaking and “shooting an invisible gaseous discharge into the air.” …no, I’m just not even going to go there. The blowout happened about 6 p.m. Tuesday. Homes within a 2 mile radius of the site where evacuated, though officials with the Ohio Department of Natural Resources say no permanent environmental impact was caused by the leak and residents were back in their houses by midnight. No word on the cause of the accident.• Is the chairman of the Ohio Democratic Party on the way out? Could be. Some say those within the party are furious at the monumental disaster that Dem gubernatorial candidate Ed FitzGerald’s campaign has become, and party chair Chris Redfern could take the heat for that. We’ll see.• Almost a year exactly after political brinksmanship and partisan wrangling ground the U.S. government to a halt, Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell says if voters in Kentucky choose him, it’s because “they want divided government.” It may be true, though. New polls heading into the Nov. 4 election show McConnell up five points over his Democratic challenger, Kentucky Secretary of State Alison Lundergan Grimes. • Finally, I want to introduce you to perhaps the weirdest online quiz ever. Can you distinguish the wisdom passed down by ornery, Texan tea party favorite Sen. Ted Cruz from the golden, learned lessons of rapper and self-proclaimed genius Kanye West? The Washington Post wants to help you find out.
 
 
by Jac Kern 07.23.2014
at 11:17 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)
 
 
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I Just Can't Get Enough

Jac's roundup of pop culture news and Internet findings

"Weird Al” Yankovic pulled a ‘Yoncé last week, dropping eight music videos in conjunction with the release of his 14th studio album, Mandatory Fun. As inherently corny as Weird Al may be, you have to commend the guy for sticking with his schtick for almost 40 years — not to mention finding such success with it. His parodies are continually accessible without hitting below the belt. For example, his take on Robin Thicke’s “Blurred Lines,” “Word Crimes,” covers facepalm-worthy grammatical errors running amok in our current age of emojis and 140-character declarations — not the rape culture controversy surrounding the original, Thicke’s pathetic fall from grace following his VMA stunt with Miley or any other gossipy low-hanging fruit like that.Mandatory Fun, Al’s final album on his 32-year contract, features riffs on Pharrell’s “Happy” (“Tacky”), Lorde’s “Royals” (“Foil”) and Iggy Azalea’s “Fancy” (“Handy”) along with general style spoofs like “Sports Song” and “First World Problems,” which resembles like a Pixies tune. The Queen’s Guard performed the Game of Thrones theme song outside Buckingham Palace, which is kind of strange when you remember Thrones is a show where royals are slaughtered, babies are fed to scary ice zombies and the queen is an incestuous bitch. Happy Birthday, Prince George! Maroon 5’s Adam Levine and Glee’s Naya Rivera both got secret-married this weekend – just not to each other. Levine and Victoria’s Secret model Behati Prinsloo were wed in a ceremony officiated by Jonah Hill (seriously) while Rivera tied the knot with Ryan Dorsey, a guy who is definitely not rapper Big Sean (whom Rivera was engaged to just three months ago). All together now: “We want prenup, we want prenup!” In non-news related news, Kanye West continues his Delusions of Grandeur tour, spouting nonsensical bullshit in his latest interview with GQ. In the cover story, West talks Kim K., calls himself a blowfish and quotes Step Brothers. What is interesting, however, is this video of a 19-year-old West, Baby 'Ye, freestyling in New York record shop Fat Beats in 1996.Someone noticed that Joaquin Phoenix has a very expressive forehead that, when viewed upside down, looks like a second face. Pictured: NIGHTMARES. New movie trailers to hit the Interwebz: Dear White People, a satirical look at race relations from millennials' perspectives; Alan Turing biopic The Imitation Game, starring Benedict Cumberbatch as the British genius/computer science pioneer; and creepy "cabin in the woods" thriller Honeymoon starring Ygritte from Game of Thrones and Dr. Frankenstein from Penny Dreadful.
 
 

R.I.P. Reading Comprehension

Plus, the Oscars get musicial and Bill O'Reilly blames rap for everything again

0 Comments · Tuesday, March 4, 2014
A map showing listening trends around the country inadvertently also shows that people don't read anymore; U2, Karen O, Pharell and "Adele Dazeem" rock the Oscars; and Bill O'Reilly decides that if the president really wants to help young black men, he needs to get "gangsta rappers" Kanye West and Jay-Z to "knock it off."  
by Amber Hemmerle 02.14.2014
Posted In: Commentary at 12:47 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)
 
 
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Trending Topics

Cincinnati's most buzzworthy tweets of the week

Each week our intern Amber will be exploring what Cincinnatians are interested in by scouring the local Twitter trends and reporting on what she’s found. From serious tweets to goofy hashtags, she’ll highlight what Cincy’s been buzzing about. So get to tweeting, folks.  #CollegeDropout The ten-year anniversary of Kanye West’s College Dropout album was Monday, Feb. 10. Other than just making me feel old, this album does bring back memories. Many people tweeted that it was one of the best rap albums produced and, with songs like “Through the Wire,” “All Falls Down” and “Slow Jamz,” it very well could be. Even if you don’t like rap or Kanye West, the dude rapped “Through the Wire” with a broken jaw and his mouth wired shut. There’s just something you have to respect about that. Shirley Temple No, not the drink... She was a 1930s child star that worked her way up from acting and singing to a place in politics. Temple was a young star that never went on to be plagued with the many misfortunes of child performers today. Is it the media, the relentless spotlight, the ruthless critics or the constant negativity on social media that drive so many to overindulge in drugs and drinking today? Even in the tweets about Temple, some were saying she died of AIDS, that she was a racist and a communist. Really? She died at age 85 and so many of the stars we all grew up with probably won’t even live to be half that old. Starbucks Tons of people were thankful for their hot cocoa and caramel macchiato this week due to the below-freezing temps again. Throw in the whole “Dumb Starbucks” stunt and you have thisa trending topic in Cincy. I predict Graeter’s will be trending at some point this summer and there will be pictures of banana splits and chocolate milkshakes everywhere. Someone should make a “Dumb Graeters” and see how much money their old cup sells for.  #RejectedCandyHearts Ahh, ‘tis the season for another funny trend thanks to Valentine’s Day. What is it about Tuesday afternoons that makes it so difficult for people to work? Now, imagine these sayings on a little candy heart from your sweetie: It’s not me, it’s you.If only someone loved you.You were almost my first choice.Front: ILY, Back: I’m Leaving You. #IfIWasWhite This hashtag was supposedly started about Shaun White, the snowboarder. Of course, if you’re not following the Olympics this trend could be seriously misconstrued. Whoever started this had to have seen the blatant double meaning. If you want to start a trend on Twitter, by all means go for it, but use your damn brain. Regardless of what this hashtag means, it should say #IfIWereWhite. You’re welcome, grammar Nazis. #TeenWolf Apparently MTV has a show that is not about the young and pregnant or the young and drunk. Congratulations, Teen Wolf, apparently you are worthy of watching. #ThriftIsBack So, Big Lots will be the official discount seller of Hostess products. Each week an assortment of Twinkies, Ding Dongs and Ho-Hos will be shipped to Big Lots everywhere and sold for cheap. Big Lots is based in Columbus, so it makes sense that this would be trending in Cincinnati. In light of this trend, many people were offering some of their best thrifty advice. Here were a few tips I found interesting:Don’t use the heated dry cycle on your dishwasher; it saves money on your energy bill. Make a grocery list and only buy what is on it. This helps to curb impulse buying at the store. This one is definitely harder than it sounds. Go to the thrift store first. Many places have a rack with all brand new clothes sent from the store because they weren’t selling, were returned, have a crooked seam or something minor. Bring your coffee from home. Figure out how much you spend a week on coffee compared to investing in a coffee pot and making your own. The savings are more than you’d expect.Follow @Thriftinnati or go to www.cincinnatithrift.com for more info on thrifting and thrift stores in Cincinnati and Northern Kentucky.Also trending: Marcus Smart, Michael Sam, #Curling, #SoChi, #HoneyBooBoo, Valentine’s Day, #SingleLife and #ForeverAlone.
 
 

Sneaky Sneaker Drop

Plus, Pop music at the Olympics and, spoiler alert, sometimes musicians mime on TV

0 Comments · Tuesday, February 11, 2014
Nike releases Kanye West's new shoe like Beyonce releases a new album, Russia scrambles to find relevant Russian pop cultural touchstones for the Olympics' opening ceremonies and the social media world freaks out because the Red Hot Chili Peppers didn't plug their instruments in during the Super Bowl halftime show.   
by Jac Kern 12.11.2013
Posted In: TV/Celebrity, Movies, Humor at 11:21 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)
 
 
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I Just Can't Get Enough

Jac's roundup of pop culture news and Internet findings

A new channel has found a coveted spot on my television’s favorites list. The Esquire Network replaced Style in late September, but it took me a few months to discover the new channel’s diverse entertaining offerings. The network’s original series feature everything from cooking to travel to style — lots of culture-y (pop and otherwise) bits. Esquire also airs reruns of popular shows like Party Down,Top Chef and Parks and Recreation. Find the channel here. Searching for a new computer game without Facebook notifications, digital farming or “Crush” in the title? Look no further than Kanye Zone. The object of the game? Like the song says, don’t let him into his zone. Speaking of Kanye’s zone, you know it’s officially the holiday season when the Kadrashians emerge their krypts to kreate their annual Kristmas kard. Not really sure why they’d spring for a photographer like David LaChapelle, because every square inch of this piece is so heavily ‘shopped. I bet they even inserted Kourt’s baby into her empty arms in post-production. And it goes without saying that this image of Bruce (sealed in glass on the far right) will haunt all of our nightmares until the end of time. Move over, Macaulay — "Pug Puppy Home Alone" is even better than the original. The entertainment gods blessed us with not one but two Major Television Events recently: The Sound of Music Live! And the Bonnie & Clyde miniseries presented by A&E, History and Lifetime. People everywhere have been crying, “Blasphemy!” over these two reboots of classic stories but, because we’re a masochistic society, everyone and their mama tuned into both. B&C was deemed historically inaccurate (Gasp! A Lifetime movie?! Surely not.), and SoM was decidedly awkward as hell, but damn if they didn’t both attract huge audiences. NBC’s live production of The Sound of Music was a hot ass mess. I’m no musical theater connoisseur, so I totally forgot all the Nazi shit in there, along with the fact that Vampire Bill was starring in this show alongside Carrie Underwood. I mean, Carrie can sing for sure, but the 21.3 million viewers were pretty much all tuning in the same way they’d watch a train wreck, which is why Carrie says she's praying for all of us haterz. Keep the prayers comin’, Carrie, because apparently we’re in for another live musical here soon. Here’s probably every movie you meant to see this year but didn’t: “I Love It” and “Ho Hey” were noticeably absent, despite being in EVERY PREVIEW EVER this year. Thankfully (said no one), they didn’t skimp on the dub-step. In other end-of-the-year news, it’s time again for Pantone to announce the official color of 2014. Get your eyeballs ready for lots of “Radiant Orchid” next year, whatever the hell that means. If you’ll recall (as if this important selection hasn’t been ingrained in your brain), 2013’s color was emerald. Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark, the book series of spooky tales and illustrations every ‘80s and ‘90s kid shared around campfires, on the bus and at sleepovers, is becoming a movie. CBS Films is working with two Saw writers on the adaptation. For those in the dark (muahahaha), the Scary Stories themselves weren’t all that terrifying — it was all about the eerie, detailed, seriously dark images that accompanied the tales. There’s no word yet on how or if these illustrations (by Stephen Gammell, who I can only assume is Satan’s nephew) will be incorporated in the film, and that will truly be a make-or-break decision. If Hollywood decides to ruin SSTTITD like everything else and go with a live-action take, I guess they could just call up Bruce Jenner. There’s no other way to say it: Bitches lose their shit over Benedict Cumberbatch. The star of Sherlock, who portrayed Kahn in Star Trek: Into Darkness and is voicing the titular dragon in the upcoming Hobbit film, has a loyal legion of fans — ahem, “Cumberbitches.” Here’s what happened when we read some lyrics off R. Kelly’s new album (which is freaking titled Black Panties, btw). As captivating and alienesque as Benny may be, like a male Tilda Swinton, the ladies truly give him the One Direction treatment. And I love me some Cumberbatch, but can we throw some love/panties Martin Freeman’s way, too? Jurassic WORLD is happening. Colin Trevorrow, director of the fantastic time-travel dramedy Safety Not Guaranteed, is taking on this fourth installment of the Jurassic Park franchise. Rumored to star are Chris Pratt (clearly Trevorrow likes working with Parks and Rec stars), Bryce Dallas Howard (The Help), Jake Johnson (who also starred in Safety) and Nick Robinson, who stole my heart in The Kings of Summer. This might actually be a great film, and not just some greedy, lazy sequel.
 
 
by Jac Kern 11.20.2013
Posted In: Fashion, Humor, TV/Celebrity, Music at 12:01 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)
 
 
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I Just Can't Get Enough

Jac's roundup of pop culture news and Internet findings

Apparently Lady Gaga did damn well as host and musical guest on this week’s Saturday Night Live, because I keep seeing stories like this praising her. I don’t know for sure, though, because I fell asleep on the couch at 10:30 p.m. and woke up just before 1 a.m., just in time to see something that has recurred in my nightmares ever since: Yeah, that’s Gaga performing “Do What U Want” with R. Kelly, a single off her new album Artpop. The two engaged in a really weird sexual…something onstage, and shit just didn’t feel right. Perhaps it’s not Gaga simulating robotic sex with the R&B star that troubles me, but the notion of R. “I will pee on you” Kelly announcing that he will do what he wants to your body. *Shudder* Somebody wake up Dave Coulier, because Alanis Morissette’s quintessential slice of ‘90s goodness that is Jagged Little Pill is becoming a musical. American Horror Story: Coven has been getting better and better by the week. We’ve seen zombies and real monsters pulled from history as the witches of Miss Robichaux’s Academy hone and develop their powers and discover new enemies. But the mellow Misty Day has been my favorite character so far. The Stevie Nicks-obsessed necromancer played to perfection by Lily Rabe has been shunned by society and, thus, doesn’t know much about other witches. She leads a lonely life in a little backwoods cabin reviving dead swamp creatures and jamming to Fleetwood Mac. Her role has become abundantly more vital to the story, so it only makes sense that the witchy woman herself, Stevie Nicks will make her acting debut on an upcoming episode. Surprise! A comically wigged Alexander Skarsgård and Lindsay Lohan (who does not require accessories to play a joke character) played Kenny Powers’ grown children on the Eastbound and Down series finale. The Real World is getting even realer next season (not) with The Real World: Ex-plosion. Taking place in San Francisco (returning for the first time since 1994’s third season with Puck and Pedro), this 29th (!!!) season will start like every other: with seven strangers — seven young, attractive, easily influenced strangers — moving into a gigantic house with an disproportionately small number of bedrooms, furnished by the Target clearance aisle, perpetually stocked with booze and Sun Drop, conveniently located within walking distance of a Subway.                                                     Four of the seven list "model-slash-something" on their resumes. But when the roomies take a trip four weeks into their stay, they will return to their makeshift home full of their ex-boyfriends and -girlfriends. Because there really weren’t enough nonsensical drunken physical altercations in any of the past Real Worlds or challenges. The annual Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show was last week (to be aired on Dec. 10 on CBS) featuring a dozen or so very hungry women, one $10 million bra, a liberal definition of angel wings, Lisa Frank-inspired looks and Taylor Swift. So if you’re a 12-year-old girl, which clearly should be Vicky’s target audience, this will be right up your alley. Photos from Jezebel here. Kanye West premiered his new music video, “Bound 2” on Ellen this week (for real). This vid starts out on a high note, with several shots of pretty, wild ponies and a lovely sample from Brenda Lee’s 1959 song, “Sweet Nothings” (“Uh-huh, honey”). But then a fake motorcycle and a jiggling Kim Kardashian sporting The Rachel cut pop up, and they all ride off on the Hot Mess Highway. Kim forgot her shirt, so she has to ride backwards, straddling Kanye, to protect her modesty. They must be in the middle of nowhere, too, because Kanye does not seem concerned that his driving vision is severely obstructed by his fiancée's bouncing boobies. Seriously, though, did they make it in a mall video booth? Super sorry to the 10-year-old whose birthday was booked right after this session. I could only imagine it would be really slippery in there. This week in classic local Craigslist finds, someone in the area is looking for the best Chewbacca impression. Winner gets $100. Details here.
 
 
by Jac Kern 10.23.2013
Posted In: Manatee beat, TV/Celebrity, Humor at 11:09 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)
 
 
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I Just Can't Get Enough

Jac's roundup of pop culture news and Internet findings

Deadspin’s Albert Burneko recently determined a signature food that represents each of the 50 states (plus Washington, D.C.) and ranked each dish/state accordingly — from The Greats and Goods (deep-dish pizza, pulled pork sandwiches) to The Better-Than-A-Finger-In-The-Eyes (chicken-fried steak, hamburger casserole)…and worse. Ohio was ranked dead last with Cincinnati chili, which came in at No. 52. “But there’s only 51 states including D.C.,” you may be thinking. Well, the delicate Burneko added “Being hit by a car” as No. 51 to really drive the point home. “Cincinnati chili is the worst, saddest, most depressing goddamn thing in the world,” Burneko writes, describing our hometown favorite as “horrifying diarrhea sludge.” It really stings (much like the raging heartburn that follows any successful Skyline adventure). Not every Cincinnatian ingests three-ways whole like a ravenous python. I like a coney or five-way every now and then, but I much prefer making it fresh at home (Skyline’s grainy, runny consistency can be a little off-putting, I’ll admit) — which, to all my Cincy-born friends who’ve moved away, is not only possible, but incredibly simple. Stop acting like you’re deprived of your native foods and get to browning some beef. But I digress. Sure, I understand the outside disdain for this not-really-chili chili, but our artery-clogging lunch staple pales in comparison to No. 47, Alaska’s akutaq. Also known as “Eskimo ice cream,” this delightful dish is comprised of berries and WHIPPED FAT. Ain’t no way a cheese coney is grosser than fruit-laced lard. Does someone shit-talking (literally?) your favorite snack make you wanna rage? Calm down with these manatees. Winter is coming — well, the cool chill of fall is upon us — but Game of Thrones is still months away. So this new (and possibly the best?) Bad Lip Reading of Game of Thrones should hold you over until March/April. Comprised of scenes from the first season of Thrones (so maybe a slight, vague spoiler alert? Spoiler Threat Level: Blue), the latest BLR actually follows a plot, in which Westeros meets Adventureland. And it’s brilliant. If only there was a Game of Thrones amusement park for real. Though if it were authentic, most people would probably find themselves getting beheaded at the food court before their visit was complete.Kanye put a ring on it. If you thought January’s Golden Globes ceremony was the best awards show in recent history, you were correct (Source: Me). Hosts Amy Poehler and Tina Few killt it and hence, they’ve been invited back to run the show in 2014 and 2015. As if the Golden Globes weren’t already the second-best awards show for watching for drunken celebrity hijinks (beat only by IFC’s Independent Spirit Awards), we can now rest assured there will be plenty of intentionally funny bits throughout the next two events. FOUR MORE YEARS!Watch the always-talented Ohio State University marching band moonwalk like never before in their recent Michael Jackson halftime tribute (and prepare for a jaw-drop at 4:15 and 4:40). Ever had to contact Netflix because streaming delays were cramping your Pretty Wild marathon (no judgment)? Like most 21st century customer service departments, Netflix allows users to chat live with a representative to help fix their issue. Of course, this function can be a goldmine for trolls or just plain unhelpful. Sometimes, however, the live chat customer service experience can be a positive and hilarious one. Netflix customer service rep Michael kicked off the exchange in a jovial fashion, speaking like a ship captain:   When customer Norm responded in a similarly playful tone, it was smooth sailing form there. (I know, I need to take a seat now.)   Now I kind of wish my Netflix would malfunction… The real reason anyone subscribes to Entertainment Weekly, their Reunion Issue, is on stands! The casts of Boy Meets World, Mystic Pizza, The X-Files, School of Rock and many more reassembled for the issue, proving yet again that women stars of the ‘80s and ‘90s looks strikingly more attractive now than they were two decades ago on screen.                        Gillian Anderson, hubba hubba. DD: You pretty fine, too. For more before-and-afters, go here . When Beyoncé shares a Beyoncé-inspired DIY dance video, the world watches. You know what they say, "Every time a young Asian guy dances to Beyoncé, an angel gets its wings."Finally, someone sent a private messaged of this dog costume photo to CityBeat's Facebook page. Presented without comment, Muttley Cyrus:
 
 

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