WHAT SHOULD I BE DOING INSTEAD OF THIS?
 
 

‘Freak Show’ and ‘Walking Dead’ Kick off Spooky TV Season

0 Comments · Wednesday, October 8, 2014
The season of pumpkin spice (formerly known as autumn) is upon us, and with it comes some favorite shows to scare your pants off.  
by Jac Kern 10.01.2014 53 days ago
at 10:45 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)
 
 
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I Just Can't Get Enough

Jac's roundup of pop culture news and Internet findings

It’s Oct. 1, which means rent’s due, Halloween season is upon us and Netflix is shuffling its offerings. New offerings starting today include the entire Gilmore Girls series, Romeo + Juliet and Team America: World Police. No longer available are Battlestar Galactica, Center Stage and Law & Order: Special Victims Unit. Find a full list of what you can and can’t stream this month here. In what can only be described as an offering to the Internet gods, Drake got an emoji tattoo.Still no confirmation on whether that emoji is high-fiving hands or praying hands illuminated by Jesus’ power. Smart girls gained an epic win over bimbos this weekend as George “Forever Bachelor” Clooney married lawyer/activist/author Amal Alamuddin. Cocktail waitresses across the globe mourn as they realize it wasn’t him, it was them.American Horror Story: Freak Show premieres in a week and we finally have a look at some actual show footage. This short preview packs in a lot — look out for Pepper (Naomi Grossman), the only AHS character to cross over into multiple seasons (you may remember her from Asylum — Freak Show takes place in 1952, about 12 years before the events of Asylum); Sarah Paulson playing conjoined twins Bette and Dot; Kathy Bates as a bearded lady; Angela Bassett as triple-tittied woman (sit down, Jasmine); Evan Peters as a man with ectrodactyly (giving him claw-like hands); smallest living woman Jyoti Amge; John Carroll Lynch’s terrifying clown; and, of course, Jessica Lange in her final AHS performance as the striking German ringleader of it all. ICYMI: Rhinegeist’s Bryant Goulding is featured in GQ’s “The 50 Best Craft Beers Every Man Must Try.” Goulding serves as an expert with tips on the best “stein filling quenchers,” suggesting Sierra Nevada Summerfest, Weihenstephaner Pilsner, Three Floyds Gumballhead, Double Mountain Vaporizer and Moonlight Reality Czeck Pilsner for when you really want to get yo drink on.The Magic Mike sequel will be air-humping its way into theaters next summer — without director Steven Soderbergh or Matthew McConaughey. Magic Mike XXL will be helmed by Gregory Jacobs (who co-produced the original); Channing Tatum, Matt Bomer, Joe Manganiello, Kevin Nash, Adam Rodriguez and Gabriel Iglesias are all set to reprise their roles. Newcomers this time around include a very curious mix of actors: Elizabeth Banks, Donald Glover, Amber Heard, Jada Pinkett Smith, Andie MacDowell and Michael Strahan. The official synopsis, found here, is equally confusing. Didn’t the dudes move to Miami at the end? Didn’t Channing Tatum quit stripping for his dead-faced nurse friend?Am I the only one who wishes SNL’s weird ‘90s sitcom sketch was a real show? By far one of the funniest moments of Saturday’s season premiere. Apparently this isn’t the first skit of its kind with Kyle Mooney and Beck Bennett — check out this very sexually tense episode with Andrew Garfield, which was cut from his episode last May. From the stiff acting and awkward delivery to the constant laugh tracks, applause and “ooohs,” this bit nails that weird, satirical, almost Tim & Eric-esque humor that’s so popular right now. Hopefully we’ll see it again later in the season. No movie trailers this week, but know that Zombieland 2, Hot Tub Time Machine 2  and Taken 3 are all happening so we can probably just give up on movies for now.
 
 
by Jac Kern 03.26.2014
Posted In: TV/Celebrity, Humor at 12:20 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)
 
 
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I Just Can't Get Enough

Jac's roundup of pop culture news and Internet findings

Children of the ‘80s likely remember Jem, the glitziest high-tech cartoon of the decade. The series followed Jerrica Benton (hottest name ever), band manager and HBIC at Starlight Music who used a holographic computer to transform into the frontwoman of Jem and the Holograms. It’s basically the blueprint for every show featuring secret alter-egos (lookin’ at you, Hannah Montana). Well, Jem is getting the movie treatment now, thanks to Jon Chu (director of fine cinematic offerings like Step Up 2: The Streets and Justin Bieber: Never Say Never). This will be a modern, LIVE-ACTION remake. May I make a casting suggestion? For more Jem fun, go here to check out this horrendous/hilarious Not Safe For Humanity spoof, courtesy of my little sister (pray for her). Broad City is just the best. Abbi Jacobson and Ilana Glazer rocked the first season of their Comedy Central series — peep the finale tonight at 10:30 p.m. — and the show’s been renewed for a second season. Here’s the duo adequately expressing how I feel when depositing my tax return check. Broad CityGet More: Comedy Central,Funny Videos,Funny TV Shows Want to watch Lady Gaga’s new music video? Well you better have an hour and a love for all things Bravo. The vid features the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills ladies as a family band, Andy Cohen as God, Gaga as a wounded phoenix or some shit, a synchronized swim team and four minutes of damn credits. Enjoy! Ever since it was revealed that American Horror Story would follow an anthology format — with each season taking on new characters, settings and themes — audiences have been speculating about where each subsequent season would take us. I always hoped for some kind of dark sideshow set in the early 20th century, like a scarier, grittier Water for Elephants. We’ve seen a murder house over the course of a century, an insane asylum in the ‘60s and nearly the entire timeline of witchcraft and Voodoo. Thankfully for weirdos like me who want to be scared by the creepy underground world of old-timey carnivals, the wait is over. American Horror Story: Freak Show is a go! Ryan Murphy tweeted the news Monday and here’s what we know so far: This season will take place in Jupiter, Fla., (Palm Beach) in 1950. Jessica Lange, AHS queen for every season (this will be her last), will portray a German Marlene Dietrich-type character running one of the last freak shows in the States. Evan Peters, Sarah Paulson, Frances Conroy, Angela Bassett and Kathy Bates have all signed on for the season — they will reportedly play the “freaks” at hand. Many other AHS alum are in talks to join this carnival, thought the show tries to keep some details under wraps to surprise the audience (ahem, son of Bloody Face). The season will premiere in October. So, Kim and Kanye are on the April kover of Vogue. Here’s some behind-the-scenes shit featuring little baby North, who consistently has “Da fu?” face. Get used to it, gurl. Former TV judge Joe Brown was arrested this week for losing his shit in a court room. The mustachioed judge was later released on his on recognizance, but not before giving us face in his mega-grump mug shot. Judge Joe Brown was cancelled last year. Bradley Cooper and Louis C.K. both appeared in American Hustle, but a new video circulating connects the two in another interesting way. Louis C.K. hosts Saturday Night Live this week.
 
 

Matt Bischoff: He's a Survivor, He's Not Gon' Give Up

0 Comments · Tuesday, February 12, 2013
Survivor starts its 26th(!) season this week and the Queen City will see one of its own on the show as local BMX rider, entrepreneur and musician Matt Bischoff joins the “Fans vs. Favorites” showdown.  

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