WHAT SHOULD I BE DOING INSTEAD OF THIS?
 
 
by Jac Kern 02.27.2013
Posted In: TV/Celebrity at 09:12 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)
 
 
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I Just Can't Get Enough

Jac's roundup of pop culture news and Internet findings

Beardwatch 2013 Last week on Survivor, most of the episode was devoted to the Bikal tribe, aka the Favorites. Our homeboy Matt Bischoff didn’t get a ton of airtime, but was selected to join an alliance with Sherri, Laura, Julia, Shamar and Mike. The other alliance, referred to as “The Lovers,” is comprised of the four attractive people who bonded early on their collective attractiveness. When Gota got their buts kicked in the immunity/reward challenge, Cincy-born Reynold Toepfer immediately addressed his issues with Shamar. The Iraq War veteran, who started a tiff with Matt last week, prefers to “conserve energy” and do crazy Pilates stretches over wasting time fishing, securing the shelter or doing pretty much anything else.                                                               Feel the burn!After Reynold spoke his peace, he proverbially slipped in an extra chair at the popular kids’ lunch table and asked Matt to join the pretty people’s decision and vote Shamar off, going against Matt’s original alliance. Later, Reynold found a hidden immunity idol (which is a thing?) that protects whoever’s in possession from elimination. After hiding the object in his pants, trying to keep it secret, Laura immediately noticed a telling “bulge” and knew the plan to eliminate one of the Lovers was foiled. Clearly, this was all just a producer’s plot to get people to talk about Reynold’s “bulge.” Success! Unfortunately, Reynold did not give his immunity idol to cuddle buddy Allie, and the blonde got six out of 10 votes (Matt stuck with his original alliance). Looks like there’s more space at the popular table! Speaking of locals on TV, it looks like Cincy has their own Sons of Anarchy (I wish). You know how at the end of every Law and Order episode, a message states that the stories are not based on actual events? Well, we all know that’s a bunch of bullshit, and this week’s upcoming episode of Special Victims Unit couldn’t make that any more clear. Via Dlisted: A famous young Hip Hop couple in a physical dispute screams “Chris and Rihanna!” but, in SVU world, the abuser done gets killt! People love it when local products make national news. The latest: BuzzFeed’s list of “Cincinnati Foods That Are Better Than Yours.” Sure, you’ve got the ubiquitous Skyline and Montgomery Inn (yawn, sorry), but there are some fresh Cincy exports like Tom + Chee’s grilled cheese donut, Kings Island’s blue soft-serve and portable yums from It’s Just Crepes. Check nearly any humor blog/Internet recreation site and you’ll likely find a list of the “Worst Tattoos EVAR” complete with misspellings, poor drunken decisions and unfortunate portraits. Also, you’ll probably see this picture. Well, not anymore — Scott Versago of Akron’s Ohio Ink Studios fixed the butchered tat! Channeling my guilty pleasure crush Oliver Peck (panel judge on Ink Master and ex-husband of Kat Von D — don’t judge me), I have to say the “new” tat has entirely too much dark shading, but it’s certainly an improvement and looks much more like the original woman who passed away. The Oscars were kind of fun this year. Seth MacFarlane didn’t attack us with his arsenal of voices (though many saw his jokes as misogyny at its finest) and the awards were pretty spread out among the films (as opposed to the usual one or two favorites). But after watching Saturday’s Film Independent Spirit Awards, no other movie awards show will match up. The much-funnier-than-MacFarlane Andy Samberg hosted, the show is uncensored on IFC and the evening was brought to us by Jameson, an apparently magical ingredient for a high-larious evening. And, yes, independent films are way cooler than Lincoln. The night kicked off with the award for Best First Screenplay (See what I mean? What a cool award.) As the camera panned around to all the nominees, Derek Connolly (of the perfectly surreal Safety Not Guaranteed) took a giant swig of what appeared to be a wine glass full of Jameson (each table had a half gallon!). To his surprise, Connolly won and went on to make a speech that stumbled along for more than six minutes (this was what appeared to be the only time the show was cut/censored), ending with a fabulous moment with the one and only Bryan Cranston. Check out this moment and more highlights: And one last Oscars gripe: I was enraged to see Channing Tatum perform an entire dance sequence onstage without tearaway pants, Ginuwine's "Pony" or a single pelvic thrust. They totally overlooked a potential Magic Mike nod and I don't appreciate it.
 
 

Side Effects

0 Comments · Wednesday, February 6, 2013
On the cusp of a self-imposed retirement from moviemaking, Steven Soderbergh delves into psychological drama with screenwriter Scott Z. Burns (The Informant! and Contagion). Side Effects examine  

Magic Mike

(Warner Home Video) 2012, Rated R

0 Comments · Wednesday, November 7, 2012
Steven Soderbergh, despite threats of an early retirement, continues his relentless pace with the entertaining, sneakily incisive Magic Mike, the 49-year-old director’s 11th effort since 2004 and his third in less than a year following the effective thrillers Contagion and Haywire. (By comparison, his buddy David Fincher has made nine movies since 1992.)   

Magic Mike

0 Comments · Wednesday, June 27, 2012
Channing Tatum just might be a real Hollywood swinger and one shrewd customer. Dreaming of fictionalizing his early days as an exotic dancer, Tatum teams up with Steven Soderbergh (after approaching Nicolas Winding Refn of Drive fame) for Magic Mike, which, from the spirited trailers, gives the impression of a return to the fun-loving Ocean’s franchise box office form for Soderbergh.  

Dear John (Review)

Romantic melodrama piles on the schmaltz

0 Comments · Friday, February 5, 2010
Lasse Hallstrom's adaptation of the Nicholas Sparks novel 'Dear John' places his usual relationship melodrama against the topical backdrop of wartime service. Sparks' stories are known for sentimental and soap-lite scripting, but Hallstrom's marks the first time that, as a critic, I came to understand the pejorative meaning of "chick flick." Grade: D-.   

Fighting (Review)

0 Comments · Wednesday, April 22, 2009
Writer/director Dito Montiel drops down a few rungs after his promising debut, 'A Guide to Recognizing Your Saints,' with an undernourished drama about small-town fighter Shawn MacArthur (Channing Tatum) who comes to Manhattan where he meets two-bit hustler Harvey Boarden (Terrence Howard). Grade B-.  

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