WHAT SHOULD I BE DOING INSTEAD OF THIS?
 
 
by Jac Kern 07.02.2014 111 days ago
Posted In: Movies, Music, TV/Celebrity, Humor at 10:32 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)
 
 
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I Just Can't Get Enough

Jac's roundup of pop culture news and Internet findings

Here at IJCGE, we’re in the business of talking trash and making jokes, not patting ourselves on the back. That being said, some readers might be interested to know that this blog was recognized last week at the Cincinnati Society for Professional Journalists’ Excellence in Journalism awards, which we assure you sounds incredibly fancier that it actually is. I Just Can’t Get Enough nabbed first place for Lifestyle Reporting — just one of several awards CityBeat received. So rest assured, when you come here for the latest Beyoncé scoop or completely biased awards show commentary, you’re utilizing an award-winning source. And speaking of Queen Bey — who just topped Forbes’ Most Powerful list (Bow down, Oprah) — locals got the rare opportunity to breathe the same air as Mrs. Carter last weekend (just kidding, of course — we all know Bey is an alien robot goddess that does not require oxygen like us plebs). Jay Z and Beyoncé’s On the Run tour made its second stop at Great American Ballpark Saturday; read our review here. Spoiler Alert: It was the best thing that has ever happened. Part of the joy of being a kid is the adventure. It’s all about having fun, throwing caution to the wind! Ten-year-olds don’t worry much about safety or the fact that death is lurking behind every corner. Some people believe we, as a society, are too overprotective of our children — we shelter them. But across generations we can all probably agree we did some pretty fucked up shit in our youth we’d never dream to attempt now. For kids around the northern New Jersey area between 1978 and 1996, Action Park in Vernon, N.J., played a role in those haunting memories of destructive youth decisions. Check out this short, highly entertaining doc on “the world’s most dangerous theme park.” The Most Insane Amusement Park Ever (Full Length) by insane-amusement-park So we’ve all had a good laugh about this defunct attraction (except all those people who died or got hurt). Well, surprise, bitch! Action Park has reopened, and everyone’s freaking out about it. Tim & Eric fans: Check out the Steve Brule Name Generator, for your health! (I got Jranice Kringus, which is what I will answer to exclusively from this point on.) In other news, apparently we’re still talking about Grumpy Cat. The Internet-famous feline was recently united with her doppelganger, Peter Dinklage, and is also in a new Honey Nut Cheerios commercial. Nelly, you’re in good company! #beegotswag #whyisthishappening Remember “First Kiss,” that hot black-and-white viral vid with strangers making out (that was actually somehow a clothing ad)? Well, now there’s “The Slap,” a hands-on response to Wren’s kissing project. It features Haley Joel Osment so it is obviously amazing. Between recording what’s become known as a rape anthem, pissing off Marvin Gaye’s family and probably cheating on/breaking up with/desperately trying to win back wife Paula Patton, Robin Thicke is generally disliked by most humans at this point. So VH1 thought this was a good opportunity to open up Twitter to questions for the singer. Apparently they never heard about #AskRKelly. It went about as well as you’d expect. New movie trailers to hit the Interwebz: Fury, a World War II action drama from David Ayer (End of Watch, Training Day) starring Brad Pitt, Charlie from Perks of Being a Wallflower and a way-too-method Shia LaBeouf; odd-couple comedy St. Vincent that has nothing to do with Annie Clark starring Bill Murray, Chris O'Dowd, Naomi Watts and Melissa McCarthy in a role that doesn't appear to be that same sloppy, stupid fat lady caricature; and dark comedy The Skeleton Twins, in which Bill Hader and Kristen Wiig play recently reunited troubled twins.
 
 
by Jac Kern 06.30.2014 113 days ago
Posted In: Live Music at 10:00 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)
 
 
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REVIEW: Jay Z and Beyoncé at Great American Ballpark

The first family of Hip Hop/R&B — and perhaps music in general — graced Cincinnati with their presence Saturday for Jay Z and Beyoncé’s On The Run tour. Downtown’s Great American Ballpark was Jay and Bey’s second stop on their first joint stadium tour, aptly abbreviated OTR (cue the wave of #thisisotr hashtags). The BeyHive was out in full force, along with whatever maniacal Jay Z fans call themselves. After a stormy afternoon, skies cleared in time for the concert, which began around 9:30 p.m. (an hour-and-a-half past the show time listed on tickets, but no surprise to regular concertgoers or fans in-the-know). The couple kicked off the set with “03 Bonnie and Clyde,” their first collaboration, recorded more than a decade ago. Next up were two more duets, “Upgrade U” and “Crazy in Love,” followed by two hours of tag-teaming many of their hits. People were blown away by the reported 42 songs performed at the inaugural OTR stop in Miami last Wednesday, and the couple delivered in Cincinnati (peep the full set list here), though every song was condensed and often mashed up with or bled into another tune. The duo performed individually and together, creating a musical tapestry of their iconic hits (“Single Ladies,” “99 Problems,” “Diva,” “Dirt Off Your Shoulder”), classics (“Hard Knock Life,” “Big Pimpin’,” “Baby Boy”) and newer work (“Tom Ford,” “Pretty Hurts,” “No Church in the Wild,” “Yoncé”). Snippets of their short film/tour preview for On The Run, which featured a ridiculously long list of celebrity cameos, played throughout the show. Other high-production videos dazzled on the two big screens, ensuring everyone from the nosebleeds to the VIPs had a decent view. For "Holy Grail," originally performed by Jay Z and Justin Timberlake (who toured together last year), Bey took on JT's lyrics, performing a powerful collaboration that left me asking, "Justin who?" "Izzo" was accompanied by a slideshow of celebrity mugshots, which culminated with Justin Bieber's — timed perfectly with the lyrics, "So poof! Vamoose, son of a bitch." “Partition” was a sexy surprise: Jay came out to a center stage in the crowd, sat in a simple chair and rapped over the simple but catchy beat. Then Bey and her thonged backup dancers took the main stage, complete with poles, performing the infectious, erotic hit. So basically, we all watched Beyoncé dance for her husband, and we’re all better people because of it. Bey tore the house down as she recreated the video, moving behind a screen to dance/seductively mount her now-signature weirdly shaped chair thing. A very similar performance was screened at the BET Awards Sunday night.Jay and Bey closed the show with “Part II ( On the Run)," “Young Forever” and “Halo,” walking through a crowd of fans to the center stage at one point. They kissed, which temporarily stopped the hearts of all in attendance, even if it was perhaps slightly awkward and possibly staged. A video medley of home footage played during the last two songs, featuring clips of the couple’s early years, engagement (where a romantic trip to the Crazy Horse strip club would later inspire Bey’s “Partition” video), secret wedding, daughter Blue Ivy’s birth and more recent shots of the family. Again, perhaps a bit overkill to non-diehard fans — “See, we’re really happy!!!” — but in the moment, it felt like the thousands of us in the park were sharing a special moment with the artists. And isn’t that what makes a successful concert? Regardless of whether the tour is a big relationship-reaffirming publicity stunt, the show was a wholly entertaining spectacle. Both Jay Z and Beyoncé performed hard, making full use of the two stages, interacting with the audience and consistently changing ensembles. Another plus for fans: the duo really seemed to be having fun, which always keeps energy levels up. Jay was sure to throw in Cincinnati references in some of his songs — a small gesture that goes a long way for fans at shows. And Beyoncé teased us all during “Why Don’t You Love Me,” in which the singer plays up a crazy, needy girlfriend persona. She belted out the titular lyrics, then paused, playfully pouting, waiting for a loud enough roar from the audience before she’d continue. We roared. The crowd at GABP was one of the most diverse I’ve ever seen at a concert in town, with visitors traveling from around the country to witness the power couple at work. Some came to dance to the Pop diva’s hits; for others, it was all about Hov’s famous rhymes; and many were eager for the rare opportunity to see two powerhouses collaborate — the audience represented a full spectrum of fans, eager to dance, drink and sing together. Who run the world? Jayoncé.
 
 
by Jac Kern 12.18.2013
Posted In: TV/Celebrity, technology, Movies, Music, Humor at 12:52 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)
 
 
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I Just Can't Get Enough

Jac's roundup of pop culture news and Internet findings

The 2014 Golden Globes, hosted by the dream team of Amy Poehler and Tina Fey, take place Jan. 12 and nominations have been announced. Here we go! In the motion picture sector, 12 Years a Slave and American Hustle lead the pack with seven nominations each. The America’s Sweethearts Showdown will finally play out as Jennifer Lawrence (American Hustle) is pitted against Julie Roberts (August: Osage County) for Best Supporting Actress in a Motion Picture (along with Sally Hawkins – Blue Jasmine, Lupita Nyong'o – 12 Years a Slave and June Squibb ­– Nebraska). Yes, I'm really trying to make the J. Law/JuRo(?) rivalry happen. Jared Leto and Matthew McConaughey were rewarded for the physical deterioration they underwent to star in Dallas Buyers Club — they’re up for Best Supporting Actor in a Motion Picture and Best Actor in a Motion Picture, Drama, respectively. On to television selections, Netflix series House of Cards raked in four nominations, the most of any series. The HBO film Behind the Candelabra also garnered four nods, but in three categories — stars Matt Damon and Michael Douglas are up against one another for Best Actor in a Mini-Series or TV Movie. Rob Lowe’s amazing work as Liberace’s plastic surgeon/pill pusher in Candelabra gets lauded with a nomination for the broad Best Supporting Actor in a Series, Mini-Series or TV Movie category, but that statue will likely go to Aaron Paul for his performance in the final season of Breaking Bad. New-to-2013 shows Masters of Sex, Brooklyn Nine-Nine and Ray Donovan each received two nominations. I was totally in love with the inaugural season of Masters this year, so I’m happy to see it up against some solid series for Best TV Series, Drama, even if it probably won’t win. I can’t bring myself to watch Brooklyn (despite my love for Andy Samberg!) because it looks decidedly unfunny, but I keep hearing I need to check it out, so judgment reserved. Ray was a decent new drama. Jon Voight killed it as the fresh-out-of-prison father to the titular character, a Hollywood “fixer” played by Liev Schreiber (also nominated). Voight’s Mickey brought the laughs in an otherwise dark story, from his penchant for big-booty video girls to the advice he gives to his nauseated grandson: “Maybe you need to faht!” Noticeably absent are Homeland, Boardwalk Empire and Mad Men, and I am OUTRAGED! OK, I’m starting to sound like everyone who’s ever listened to a local band after the CEA nominations are announced. #sitthehelldown But seriously, Damien Lewis’ performance as Homeland’s Brody, while limited on screen this season, was incredible. He truly has played so many sides and shades of the character. That detox scene? Haunting. He nailed the deterioration of Brody completely. I also thought this was one of the best seasons of Boardwalk. Completely biased opinion: John Huston’s Richard Harrow has been my favorite character of the series (besides Lucy, played by the incomparable queen of mot messes Paz de la Huerta, OBVS). With so many other amazing characters, it’s totally understandable that he wouldn’t leave with an award, but…Richard! "Hold me." As for Mad Men, neither the show nor its actors have won a Globe since 2009, when it was awarded for Best TV Series, Drama. The show is not suffering — in fact, watching Don (Jon Hamm) finally crack and start to act like a real human was incredible this season. Oh, well. There’s always next year’s Emmys, I guess? Read all the nominations here.It’s almost Christmas, so what better time for another Apple ad to make you unexpectedly shrivel up and bawl? Beyoncé blew the top off the Internet late last week, surprise-releasing 14 new songs plus 17 music videos in a full, mega, meta “visual experience” of an album, leaving most of us with nothing left on our holiday wish lists. Titled simply Beyoncé, the package features collaborations with Jay Z, Frank Ocean, Drake and Blue MFing Ivy, sexy-ass songs with some straight up raunch, audio/video from Star Search and home movies and several shots of Bey’s thonged butt. It’s perfection. And because no one can ever get enough Yoncé (That’s right, it’s Yoncé, Mrs. Carter if you’re nasty), she’s also releasing a mini-documentary about the album in various parts, day by day. Buy the package, watch the videos and get swept up in the Carter life here. John Mayer and Katy Perry are totes an item and, in case you needed any reminders of what a supreme douche J. May is, well, here’s their first couples interview (gag) — skip to 2:50 for John’s really touching words about Katy’s craft/to hear him drop an F bomb (edited out, thanks ABC!) while doing so. Unfortunately your browser does not support IFrames. R. Kelly(’s PR) thought it would be a good idea to get #askrkelly trending, to spark a sort of AMA with Twitter fans, and it was a total marketing fail. In fact, the timing of the backfired publicity stunt led perfectly to this Village Voice interview with the Chicago Sun-Times music critic that broke the story detailing R. Kelly’s involvement with underage girls almost 15 years ago. This journalist, Jim DeRogatis, reminds us just how disgusting of a rap sheet R. has. I guess somewhere between Trapped in the Closet parts V and XXVI, we forgot the dude was a legit pedo. Buzzfeed dubbed Newport Aquarium’s Scuba Santa one of eight “Most Badass Santas in the World,” not to be confused with “One of Most Extreme Santas in World,” as reported by basically every other local media outlet (buncha babies). If there’s just one viral family Christmas video-card (ugh) making its rounds that particularly makes me want to gouge my eyes out, it’s the Holderness family’s. Set to the tune of the very current “Welcome to Miami,” this family of four teaches us what the holidays are truly about: bragging about the year’s accomplishments. Namely, running triathlons, appearing in blockbuster films and learning Chinese — in their "Christmas jammies." Fucking white people. Shia LaBeouf was a child actor, so I guess he never went to school to learn that copying off your neighbor's work is pretty much universally looked down upon. That's the only explanation I can come up with to justify his plagiarizing of Daniel Clowes' comic Justin M. Damiano for his new short film, HowardCantour.com. Read all about the fiasco here, and see the similarities for yourself. LaBeouf said sorry via Twitter, which should be enough, but he apparently lifted his apology off Yahoo Answers. So help us all.
 
 

Good 'Dog'

Along with a new album and fruitful foray into acting, Cincinnati’s Kim Taylor is now looking to write songs for other artists

0 Comments · Wednesday, October 23, 2013
Cincinnati singer/songwriter Kim Taylor’s new album, Love’s a Dog, coincides with the local premiere of I Used to Be Darker, the critically-acclaimed indie film in which she co-stars.  

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