WHAT SHOULD I BE DOING INSTEAD OF THIS?
 
 
by Jac Kern 09.24.2014 85 days ago
Posted In: TV/Celebrity, Music, Movies, Humor at 01:56 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)
 
 
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I Just Can't Get Enough

Jac's roundup of pop culture news and Internet findings

Human grumpy cat Aubrey Plaza will provide the voice for actual Grumpy Cat (real name: Tardar Sauce) in a Lifetime Christmas special! Who knew people still cared about Grumpy Cat? Moreover, who knew Lifetime made intentionally funny programs? John Malkovich has portrayed a plethora of characters over the years and now he’s taken on the stars of famous photographs in some cool recreated shots by Sandro Miller:  See them all here.As “fannibals” of the artfully demented Bryan Fuller spectacle await the next course of NBC’s Hannibal, we get a taste of what’s to come. Whereas the first season focused on French cuisine, pulling episode titles from traditional French courses, and the second did the same with Japanese fare, it appears Season Three will be Italian, judging by Fuller’s tweet of the first episode’s script, titled “Antipasto.” We last saw Hannibal (in one of the most insane episodes of any show ever) on a plane to France — perhaps this season finds him in Italy? With the possibility that nearly every character on the show is dead, maybe this season will totally flip the script and just become the creepiest cooking show of all time. I can see it now: “Today on Eating Hannibal, we have a special guest joining Chef Lecter. Please welcome Bobby Flay! Well, parts of Bobby Flay…” If you like miniature things, animal videos and eating, you are one of billions of people who use the Internet. Also, you may be familiar with the tiny hamster that eats tiny versions of human treats, like in this video, where he enjoys an authentic Mexican feast of tiny burritos. Well, Tiny Hamster is back, this time taking on competitive eater Takeru Kobayashi: You may also be familiar with Jasmine Tridevil. In a shocking turn of events, it seems that Total Recall prostitute wannabe claiming to have a third breast added to her body is a FRAUD. Doctors agree the surgery would be nearly impossible to pull off and my eyeballs agree that the shit looks fake. Drag queens have been using prosthetic breast plates for years! Jasmine clearly will go to any lengths to get a TV show — besides actually getting a third boob, I guess. And she appears to have a past of creating stunts for media attention. Ya been Snopes’d, girl! And speaking of Total Recall, the star of the movie’s 2012 remake Colin Farrell has been confirmed as one of the many speculated-about leads for the second season of HBO's True Detective. Vince Vaughn was also confirmed as another star in an HBO press release yesterday. Farrell will play Ray Velcoro, "a compromised detective whose allegiances are torn between his masters in a corrupt police department and the mobster who owns him,” according to the release. Vaughn will portray Frank Semyon, “a career criminal in danger of losing his empire when his move into legitimate enterprise is upended by the murder of a business partner.” Both actors had been rumored to star in the show for a while now, so if they’re confirmed we can probably expect Taylor Kitsch to formally come aboard soon. The show will also feature a female lead, after getting some kickback for the lack of leading ladies in Season One. Mad Men’s Elizabeth Moss and Michelle Forbes (aka Maryanne the maenad from True Blood) are two possibilities from the rumor mill — they’re also listed on the show’s IMDB page, along with Kitsch, but that’s not offish — and supposedly Rosario Dawson, Jessica Biel, Abigail Spencer, Malin Akerman, Oona Chaplin, Jaimie Alexander and Brit Marling have all read for a part. Fast & Furious director Justin Lin will direct the first two episodes, which should make us all nervous. Awesome director of Season One Cary Joji Fukunaga won an Emmy for his work; this season will feature several different directors. Kirsten Dunst stars in a lovely “short film” that actually more of a PSA about how not to be a weird dick to celebrities and other humans in general. ASPIRATIONAL from Matthew Frost on Vimeo. Love this but seriously, do celebrities really use Uber?
 
 
by Jac Kern 04.17.2013
Posted In: Music, Movies, Humor, TV/Celebrity at 09:35 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)
 
 
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I Just Can't Get Enough

Jac's roundup of pop culture news and Internet findings

Upon reading recent entertainment news, you may find yourself wondering, “Are awards shows are still happening?” The answer is yes, but not anything that really counts. The MTV Movie Awards took place Monday night, hosted by the Australian fireball that is Rebel Wilson. She’s stolen scenes in Bridesmaids, Pitch Perfect and Workaholics, and while she made a good host for the second-rate, teen-targeted show, it was kind of disappointing that 90 percent of her jokes were about either her vagina or her weight. Other low points included Taylor Lautner’s attempt at comedy (Side Note: How will the MTV Movie Awards live on now that the Twilight series is over?), Selena Gomez’s possibly offensive Bollywood-inspired performance and the fact that the whole production was essentially a giant lead-up to the premiere of the Hunger Games: Catching Fire trailer (Oh, that’s how the show will continue…). But there were some quality moments, namely during the Comedic Genius award presentation. Get More: 2013 MTV Movie Awards, Latest Movie News, Will Ferrell Peter Dinklage presented this prestigious prize to Will Ferrell (they worked together in Elf) and you could tell that The Dinks was thinking, “Don’t these people know I am Tyrion Lannister? I am too good for this shit,” the whole damn time. Ferrell came out in a money-printed suit, dropping classic WF hilarity (aka saying literally anything in his Ron Burgundy voice) and sufficiently creating plenty of buzz for the forthcoming Anchorman sequel. The best part, however, was when a shwasted Aubrey Plaza stormed the stage during Will’s acceptance speech. With glazed-over eyes, a plastic cup of booze and “# The To Do List,” (her upcoming movie) written on her chest, the actress hopped onstage, half-heartedly tried to grab the popcorn award from Will’s hands, quickly realized how this looked to everyone else, then ran back to her seat. Ferrell did not take this opportunity to embarrass her further, as she clearly regretted the stunt immediately.                                        "What the shit was I thinking?! I’m such an idio—Smile for the camera!"Plaza was escorted out of the show after the stunt, and you know you’re at a new level of drunk when you must be removed from an MTV event. On Monday, she gave us this morning-after tweet of shame: Logo’s NewNowNext Awards followed on Monday night. With a fabulous mix guests (Read: drag queens for DAYS) and campy categories, it was a fun event that didn’t take itself too seriously. Which is good, because that shit was hella low-budge. Check out the whole show here. Now that Arrested Development’s Netflix premiere date has been officially announced (May 26!), promotional material and fan-created goodies are rolling out in full force. Designer Josh Cox created these awesome record sleeves for each member of the Bluth clan. My favorite:And speaking of Arrested Development, Brandon Killham, the actor who played young Michael Bluth also played a young Dick Whitman on this week’s Mad Men (and in previous episodes). Oh, and he also played a young Brian Moser/Rudy Cooper on Dexter. Mind = Blown. Why am I obsessed with celebrity Coachella fashion? I don’t know, but if you feel like getting sucked into a denim cutoff-crop top-hippie-hobo abyss, browse photos here. Holy shit, Glee finally did a school shooting episode — sort of. Sue Sylvester’s right-hand woman, Becky, brought her father’s gun to school because, as a student with Down syndrome, she was nervous to graduate and leave the school’s safe haven. She wanted to keep it for protection. The gun went of by accident when Becky was discussing the issue with Sue in her office, and no one was hurt. To protect Becky, Sue took the blame for the gun and was fired. It is not clear if or when Jane Lynch’s character will return, but it is likely. Check out the controversial scene here. Louis C.K.’s HBO special, Oh My God debuted last Saturday and, to no one’s surprise, it was poignant, intelligent and laugh-out-loud hilarious. For such a dark, crude comic, I found the larger themes of many jokes to have something of a positive message. OK, not every joke… Check out the New York Times’ recent interview with Louie here. And now, for a segment I’d like to call “Hold Up, Y’all, Cincinnati’s on the TV!” Trew Quackenbush and Corey Ward, the guys behind gourmet grilled cheese and tomato soup spot Tom + Chee, announced Friday that they will be featured on ABC’s Shark Tank in an episode airing at 9 p.m. May 17.  Lauren Brown, local chef at Igby’s who starred in the single greatest television show of all time, will also appear on the small screen. Brown will be one of four chefs competing on Chef Wanted with Anne Burrell to be hired on as head chef at Nikki Beach in Miami, Fla. The episode airs at 10 p.m. April 25 on Food Network. The show also featured Jeff Ruby and The Precinct on a recent episode (Spoiler Alert: The winning chef didn’t even end up accepting the job offer).
 
 

Safety Not Guaranteed

0 Comments · Wednesday, June 27, 2012
Imagine a team of eager magazine employees investigating a classified ad seeking a companion for time jumping (mis)adventures. Aubrey Plaza, Jake M. Johnson, Karan Soni and Mark Duplass who seems to jumping from project to project this summer (you can catch him in People Like Us and in the upcoming Your Sister’s Sister) star.   

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