CityBeat Blogs - Music http://www.citybeat.com/cincinnati/blogs-1-1-1-33-142.html <![CDATA[Your Weekend To Do List: 11/21-11/23]]>

Things to leave the house for all weekend. Shopping. Holiday stuff. Music. Plays. Food. 

On Friday:

  • The Germania Society hosts a traditional German Christmas market all weekend — Christkindlmarkt — including hot mulled wine and Saint Nicholas.
  • ArtWorks hosts its last Secret ArtWorks fundraiser ever. Buy a ticket, get a secret 5-by-7-inch artwork. (Plus food, alcohol and live music.)
  • In other shopping news, BuyCincy (formerly Unchained Cincinnati) supports a weekend shopping-local initiative with more than 200 Northern Kentucky and Cincinnati small businesses. Buy local and get entered to win prizes.
  • You can also catch Hansel and Gretel (the opera) at CCM or Shakespeare's The Comedy of Errors at Cincy Shakes.
  • Jamaican Queens bring their imagining of an Electropop seance between Joy Division and Deadmau5 to MOTR Pub.
On Saturday:
  • Lots of sparkly holiday stuff. The Zoo illuminates with the annual Festival of Lights celebration (including the option to purchase hot chocolate with booze in it). Eden Park also lights up with Balluminaria — a dozen or so hot air balloons glow on Mirror Lake.
  • Northside hosts the Northside Record Fair. Find vinyl, cassettes, music memorabilia and more. Pay an extra $5 and get in an hour early.
  • Head to the Cincinnati Art Museum to check out some street art in curator Brian Sholis' Eyes on the Street.
  • If you miss the original Dusmesh, the former owners opened a new Indian restaurant called Swad in College Hill. Our reviewer tried it and the food tastes as good as you remember.  
On Sunday:
  • Go global. Before you overload on turkey next week, try a Taste of Lebanon. Lebanese food, desserts, music and more. 
  • The Victory of Light expo gets metaphysical with seminars on everything from tarot cards and past lives to astrology and meditation.
  • It's the last night for Jessimae Peluso, comedian and start of MTV's Girl Code, at Funny Bone on the Levee. 

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<![CDATA[I Just Can't Get Enough]]>

Survivor-type Bear Grylls may drink his own pee and propose to his wife with an ass diamond, but naturalist filmmaker Paul Rosolie is upping the ante in the weird wilderness game by allowing himself to be “eaten alive” — for real, apparently — by an anaconda on TV.

Judging by the trailer, viewers will witness Rosolie and his crew travel to the Amazon, hunt down an anaconda, suit up in a custom death-proof ensemble, douse himself with pig blood and wait for said anaconda to get hungry. The Eaten Alive special airs on Discovery on Sunday, Dec. 7 as part of something called “Mega Week.” Apparently both Rosolie and the anaconda survived the incident, which was filmed in advance. Cue the music!

In other “Oh my god, Becky” news, Kim Kardashian’s greasy butt on the cover of Paper magazine has everyone all in a tizzy. I think we should be offended by the headline/goal of the spread to “Break the Internet,” because haven’t we all seen Kim’s dump truck plenty of times before? More noteworthy is the fact that she’s popping out of a trash bag, which is actually quite fitting.

Look at these cute illustrations of movies with one letter removed from the title. And yes, I would totally see a Ron Swanson superhero movie called Ron Man.

Some of your favorite lady-shows are coming back in January!

Girls returns Jan. 11:


Broad City is back Jan. 14:

Your BFF Jennifer Lawrence will never get a Twitter, and it’s all because of all you pervs who looked at her hacked pics she’s “not very good on phone or technology.” TIL Jennifer Lawrence is all of our moms.

Entertainment Weekly’s annual reunion issue is on stands now, which means apparently it’s already time to reminisce about Mean Girls and Napoleon Dynamite.

Fox News’ Megyn Kelly accidentally cursed on air when introducing Mike Huckabee this week. She said Fuckabee.

Watch these 1980s aerobic workout stars get down to Taylor Swift earworm “Shake It Off”

Kim Kardashian is releasing a selfie coffee table book called Selfish. Wait, two Kardashian-related items in one post? Everything is horrible, bye!

New movie trailers to hit the Interwebz: Neill Blomkamp (District 9, Elysium) teams up with the incomparable Sharlto Copley again with Chappie, about a robot raised by a group of humans (Dev Patel, Yolandi and Ninja of Die Antwoord), proving once again that Copley is the go-to actor to play robot men; World War I drama Testament of Youth, starring Kit Harington (aka a beardless Jon Snow) and Hayley Atwell; and a fucking Minions movie.

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<![CDATA[Something Wicked This Way Comes]]>

October is synonymous with Halloween, haunted houses, harvest festivals and more-sexy-than-scary costume balls. Whether you plan on being a slutty nurse, a moody John Snow, your basic zombie or Dracula, the Tristate offers more than enough events for you to get your freaky on all haunting season.

BAR EVENTS 
Arnold's Halloween Blackout — Arnold's hosts a Halloween Blackout party, tapping eight hard-to-find seasonal black stouts including Rivertown's Deateh, Southern Tier's Warlock, MadTree's Are You Ready for the Darkness, Bell's Java Stout, Bad Tom Smith's, 50 West, Listermann's Lateral Nitro Oatmeal Sweet Stout and Great Lakes Brewing aged black stout. Live music from the Hot Magnolias. Beers tapped at 4 p.m.; music at 9 p.m. Oct. 31. Free. Arnold's Bar and Grill, 210 E. Eighth St., Downtown, arnoldsbarandgrill.com.

Fear of the Dark — The bar’s fourth annual celebration of dark beers featuring Southern Tier’s Warlock, Great Divide’s Chocolate Oak Aged Yeti and more (while supplies last). 4 p.m.-2 a.m. Oct. 23-31. Free entry; beers cost money. The Lackman, 1237 Vine St., Over-the-Rhine, lackmanbar.com

Halloween Concert at the Littlefield — Party for a good cause! Hiders and the Perfect Children will be performing, while the Littlefield serves you up food, beer and drink specials all night! There will be a costume contest as well, so dress to impress! Proceeds will benefit the Cincinnati Northside Community Urban Redevelopment Corporation. All night. Oct. 31. Free. The Littlefield, 3934 Spring Grove Ave., Northside, littlefieldns.com

Japp's Halloween Eve Dance Party — Ring in Halloween with a costume contest, dance party, "scary-delicious" cocktails and prizes. 9 p.m.-2 a.m. Oct. 30. Free. Japp's, 1136 Main St., Over-the-Rhine, japps1879.com.

Neon's David Bowie's Labyrinth-Themed Halloween Party and Silent Disco — The Labyrinth will be on the TV all night, David Bowie and Halloween tunes with be on the juke and at the silent disco, you can grab a pair of headphones and dance around all night. 4 p.m.-2 a.m. Oct. 31. Free. 208 E. 12th St., Over-the-Rhine, facebook.com/neonsunplugged.

Pick Your  Poison — People in costumes get $3 Dogfish Head Pumpkin, $4 call cocktails or $5 bombs. Oct. 31. The Righteous Room, 641 Walnut St., Downtown, therighteousroom.com.

Pavilion's 13th Annual Halloween Masquerade — Costume contest, cash prizes, and DJ Big Once. Nov. 1. Free. Mount Adams Pavilion, 949 Pavilion St., Mount Adams, 513-744-9200.

‘Stache Bash at The Stand — In partnership with Movember Cincinnati, The Stand invites you to boogie down on Halloween night! Anyone wearing a mustache (real or fake) gets $3 Yuengling Brewery’s Black & Tan all night! There will also be a costume contest starting at midnight. 9 p.m.-2 a.m. Oct. 31. Free. The Stand, 3195 Linwood Ave., Mount Lookout, thestandcincy.com

Wicked Wine Tasting — A costume contest, snacks, door prizes, wine tastings and live music. 4 p.m. Oct. 25. $10. Meier’s Wine Cellars, 6955 Plainfield Road, Silverton, meierswinecellars.com

Zombie Pub Crawl — A spooky slow Covington pub crawl starting at the Cock & Bull Public House then to Pachinko, Zola and finally the Strasse Haus at 11:30 p.m. Awards for best scary and sexy zombie costumes. 10 p.m. Oct. 25. Free. Cock & Bull English Pub, 601 Main St., Covington, Ky., candbpublichouse.com

MASQUERADE AND COSTUME BALLS 
A Wicked Affair — Drinks, dancing and a costume contest in support of organ donation, benefiting the National Kidney Foundation of Greater Cincinnati. 7 p.m. Oct 25. $40. Receptions Banquet and Conference Center, 4450 Eastgate South Drive, Eastgate, 937-763-0474, 513-265-8530, facebook.com/ awickedaffair

Children’s Dyslexia Centers of Cincinnati Halloween Gala — Support the Children’s Dyslexia Centers of Cincinnati by attending a Halloween Gala where guests will be treated to a performance by the Naked Karate Girls while enjoying an evening of dancing, food and drinks. Guests are also invited to help sponsor the event with Gold, Platinum and Diamond packages. 7 p.m. Oct. 25. $30 in advance; $40 at the door; $500 VIP tables. Cincinnati Masonic Center, 317 E. Fifth St., Downtown, cdcoc.org/halloween

Fashion Angels: The Masquerade — Dress to impress in your best masquerade disguise, all for a great cause. This charitable fashion event benefits the American Cancer Society, Freestore Foodbank, Aubrey Rose Foundation and more while showcasing local designers, singers, dancers and hair and makeup stylists. Attendees are encouraged to bring non-perishables for the Freestore Foodbank. 6-11 p.m. Oct. 31. $25. Kings Island Resort & Conference Center, 5691 Kings Island Drive, Mason, fashionangels.org

Pop Art Costume Party — Grab your most vibrant, colorful costume and head to this Art After Dark event. Join the Cincinnati Art Museum in celebration of all things Pop with the opening of Beyond Pop Art: A Tom Wesselmann Retrospective. Tours of the special exhibition will meet in the Great Hall at 5:30 p.m. (members only), 6:30 and 7:30 p.m. (public tours). Drinks and appetizers available for purchase. 5-9 p.m. Oct. 31. Free admission; $4 parking; free for Art Museum members. Cincinnati Art Museum, 953 Eden Park Drive, Eden Park, cincinnatiartmuseum.org

Scream Acres Haunted House Dance Party — It’s not every day (or even every Halloween) you get to listen to live zombified music in one of the area’s largest and most terrifying haunted houses. But Scream Acres is pulling out all the stops to make this a fright night to remember: it’s opening its doors to a ghoulishly impressive lineup of bands to create a night of costumes, dancing, monsters, and screams. All ages are welcome … if they dare. 7 p.m.-2 a.m. Oct. 31. $14. Scream Acres Ct., 4399 Boron Drive, Covington, Ky., cincyscreams.com

The Malice Ball — Dance the night away in a spectacular masquerade ball while being served by bartender’s from Bakersfield OTR, the Eagle and other OTR favorites. The Malice Ball will also feature light snacks from OTR restaurants, makeup and styling by Rebel Face Makeup, a photo booth and more! DJ Matt Joy will be providing the tunes for the night. All proceeds benefit the Over-the-Rhine Chamber’s Business First Grant Program. Must be 21 years of age or older. 8-12:30 p.m. Oct. 31. $25 advance; $35 at the door. Christian Moerlein Brewing Company, 1621 Moore St., Over-the-Rhine, otrchamber.com

Boogie to Death — Dance Halloween away in Hollywood Casino's Boogie Nights, with 600 feet of lighted dance floor, a haunted maze of horror and costume contest. $1,000 for best overall costume. 9 p.m. Oct. 31. $10. 777 Hollywood Blvd., Lawrenceburg, Ind., hollywoodindiana.com.

For more events, like family-friendly frights, scary movie screenings and haunted tours, click here.

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<![CDATA[I Just Can't Get Enough]]>

Who you gonna call? Lady Busters! After years of talk about another Ghostbusters film, Paul Feig (Freaks and Geeks, The Heat, Arrested Development, Bridesmaids, The Office) say he will direct a femme-centric sequel and co-write the script with The Heat’s Katie Dippold. Here’s to them casting Melissa McCarthy, Kristen Wiig and Mindy Kaling with Seth Rogen as a Dana Barrett character!

Other sequels/spinoffs happening include a Lego Batman flick and…sigh…Joe Dirt 2.

Katy Perry will be the halftime performer at Super Bowl XLIX. Expect plenty of day-glo, emojis, personified junk food, accessories from Claire’s 1999 collection and just the perfect amount of cultural appropriation. Hopefully Riff Raff will be in tow.

But Katy Perry isn’t just a Pop star with an awesome gig — she knows her football, too. In fact, she was recently a guest picker on ESPN’s College GameDay for the recent LSU v. Auburn game. I was...interesting.

Men in Hollywood are facing an epidemic. Too often Everyman-looking funny dudes disappear for a minute only to reemerge changed. Thin. Toned. Chiseled. We saw Jonah Hill shrink, Chris Pratt turn to stone and even Drew Carrey get slim. Now we have skinny Zach Galifianakis. What has the world come to?

If you haven’t seen or read Gone Girl, go do one or both right now so you can enjoy it before it inevitably gets spoiled for you. If you have experienced the mind-fuck that is Gone Girl, you know about the series of Amazing Amy books Amy Dunne’s parents wrote throughout her life. Soon, you’ll be able to buy actual Amazing Amy books. Meta. Peep a preview here.

As speculated earlier when a Twin Peaks casting call made its rounds on the Internet, the beloved David Lynch series is returning to television! The limited nine-episode series will air on Showtime at some point in 2016 — just don’t expect this to be a direct continuation of events from the last season that aired in 1991.

Who doesn’t like to fire up Sam Smith, dim the lights and have a good cry? Dude has soul. But for a lighter, more humorous take on Smith’s hit "Stay With Me,” check out Daniel “Forever Damien from Mean Girls” Franzese in “Please Go Home.”

All together now: “You can’t stay with us!”

Three years ago, Parks and Recreation introduced the world to “Treat Yo’ Self” Day (typically observed on Oct. 13, when the episode originally aired). So if you’re in need of a little pampering, Buzzfeed has a few ideas about how to celebrate this week.

Bill Hader hosted Saturday Night Live last weekend — despite him having only left the cast a year ago — bringing the return of some favorite characters (of course Stefon) as well as fan favorite Kristen Wiig. Did you miss the episode? Apparently everyone did — it was the show’s lowest rated episode ever matched only by Charlize Theron’s episode from just 5 months ago. Woof. And it was actually pretty good!

One the flipside, everyone watched the crazy Walking Dead premiere Sunday. Let's celebrate the show's return with a new Bad Lip Reading, shall we?


New movie trailers to hit the Interwebz: Haley Joel Osmet stars in Sex Ed as a sex-starved dude (…named Eddie…) who lands a gig at a middle school teaching — you guessed it! — human sexuality; Disney mystery-adventure Tomorrowland, starring George Clooney; and holiday comedy A Merry Friggin Christmas — one of Robin Williams’ final films.

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<![CDATA[Your Weekend To Do List: 10/10-10/12]]>

 It's the weekend, y'all. 

And as it approaches 5 p.m. on a Friday, you're probably thinking to yourself, "What should I do this weekend?" Why not try one of these …

  1. Watch the all-OTR episode of Diners, Drive-Ins and Dives. Vine Street turns into Flavortown as Guy Fieri eats his way from Taste of Belgium to Senate and Bakersfield. Airs 10 p.m. Friday on the Food Network (and a bunch of other times.)
  2. See John Waters. The iconic, mustachioed Mr. Waters presents his randy and raunchy one-man monologue, This Filthy World, at Memorial Hall on Saturday at part of FotoFocus. “‘Filthy’ is a word I use as a compliment. To me, it still has a punk edge. It is a joyous word to me." - John Waters.
  3. Make some really effing good pasta. Chef Danny Combs from Sotto reveals how to make restaurant-worthy cacio e pepe (butter, spaghetti, Pecorino cheese and black pepper) at home.  
  4. Tackle the great white wale at Know Theatre. The theater presents Herman Melville’s classic 1851 novel, Moby Dick, adapted for stage Julian Rad.  Co-directed by new artistic director Andrew Hungerford and veteran avant-garde theater artist Michael Burnham, the script has been stripped to its essence and reimagined for Know’s intimate space. 
  5. Trick-or-Treat at the Zoo (or, if you don't have kids, grab a beer and watch different zoo animals try to figure out how to eat a pumpkin). Every Saturday and Sunday in October, the Cincinnati Zoo hosts HallZOOween with trick-or-treat stations, a variety of special pumpkin-themed animal activities with bears, cats, elephants and more and Hogwart’s Express Train Ride. 
  6. Eat some award-winning barbecueCincinnati Parks hosts the city’s first-ever sanctioned State Championship Kansas City Barbeque Competition, where guests can watch pro teams compete to make the perfect barbecue in categories based on meat type — and then taste the results. 
  7. Pick your own pumpkin. Or apples.
  8. Remember how cool books are Books by the Banks (and see Cincinnati native David Bell discuss his latest thriller.)
  9. Celebrate fermented cabbage at the 45th Ohio Sauerkraut Festival. This weekend, visitors to Waynesville, Ohio will eat more than seven tons of SnowFloss Kraut. If you want to tackle the crowd of 350,000, the Waynesville Chamber of Commerce gave us a game plan of some must-try sauerkraut dishes. (And a recipe to make at home in case you don't.) Festgoers must try:

  • Sauerkraut Pizza. Made by the Order of the Eastern Star Masons, the handmade pizzas come in whole pies or slices and are topped with tomato sauce, cheese, green peppers, onions and sauerkraut.
  • Cabbage Rolls. For more than 30 years, St. Augustine's Church has cooked cabbage rolls for the festival — recently, more than 10,000 per weekend. Cooked cabbage leaves are filled with ground beef, rice and spices and covered in tomato sauce.
  • Sauerkraut desserts. The Waynesville Chamber of Commerce will be serving up sauerkraut pie, sauerkraut fudge, sauerkraut brownies and sauerkraut cookies.
  • Sauerkraut Balls. A classic: breaded and fried sauerkraut and bacon, served by the Waynesville fire department.
  • German Sundae. This is a pile of potatoes, topped with kraut, sour cream, cheese, bacon and green olive. (Recipe below.)
Recipe for Sauerkraut German Sundae
Provided by the Sons of the American Legion Post 615, Waynesville

Ingredients:
5 to 6 lbs. sliced or diced potatoes
1 tsp. salt
1 tsp. pepper
¼ lb butter

Instructions: Seal and bake in 13x9x2 inch baking pan for 1 hour and 45 minutes at 350. Place approximately 8 oz. in bowl and top with the following: 1 Tbsp. cooked sauerkraut; 1 tsp sour cream; and melted cheddar cheese (as desired). Sprinkle with bacon bits, top with green olive.  Makes 10-15 servings. 

For more ideas of things to do, see our staff picks


 

 

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<![CDATA[I Just Can't Get Enough]]> In advance of last Sunday’s Bengals game against the Patriots (I know, let’s not speak of that), some local players were featured on The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon’s popular "Tonight Show Superlatives” segment.

Andy Dalton truly is a personified pumpkin spice latte, isn’t he?

Real Housewives of New Jersey stars Teresa and Joe Giudice last week both plead guilty to multiple counts of fraud and were sentenced to 15 months and 41 months in federal prison, respectively. Teresa will serve her sentence first beginning in January 2015. Joe faces deportation to his native Italy following his jail time. The two sat down with Andy Cohen for an exclusive interview that aired Monday on Bravo. The network reportedly paid big bucks for the one-on-one — according to some sources, enough to cover their restitution — but Bravo denied the claims. A hefty paycheck would explain some of the tough, pressing questions Cohen was able to get away with. (At one point as we were watching Part One, my boyfriend hushed me — “I’m trying to hear this,” he said — which has certainly never happened during a Bravo program. Ever.) Part Two of the interview airs Thursday at 9 p.m.

The Giudices serve as a reminder not to commit bank fraud, mail fraud, wire fraud, bankruptcy fraud or lie on loan applications or forget to pay your taxes. And if you do, try not to throw lavish parties in your tacky suburban castle on national television. On the upside, they did just provide me with an excellent pop-culturally relevant Halloween costume idea. Thanks, Tre!

Related: Fellow New Jerseyan and tanning enthusiast Mike “The Situation” Sorrentino has also recently been charged with tax fraud conspiracy. Way to make the Garden State proud.

Lil Jon, “Lil Lena” Dunham, Fred Armisen, children of famous folks and other celebs teamed up for an epic Rock the Vote video:

Because we just can’t let that terrible club anthem died quietly, can we?

Some of the scariest shows of the season start up this week, with American Horror Story: Freak Show debuting tonight on FX and The Walking Dead’s fifth season premiere Sunday on AMC. Read more about these shows and others to watch in this week’s TV column.

We already know a TWD spinoff/companion series is in the works, though few details have been revealed, and now we’re learning American Horror Story will get a related offshoot. I know what you’re thinking: each season basically is a spinoff of the AHS franchise. But this is a little different. Ryan Murphy will direct a new series based on the same anthology format and American setting for American Crime Story. Each season (presuming its success matches that of AHS) will follow a different true American crime, beginning with one of the most followed court cases of all time: The O.J. Simpson trial. American Crime Story: The People Vs. O.J. Simpson has already been ordered as a 10-episode series for FX. Read more here.

Portlandia’s feminist bookstore sketch may be a hilarious fiction, but it’s filmed in real Portland bookshop In Other Words. The IRL Women and Women First is at risk of closing and it needs your help!

Alfonso Ribeiro of The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air is on Dancing with the Stars so of course he did “The Carlton”:

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<![CDATA[I Just Can't Get Enough]]>

Human grumpy cat Aubrey Plaza will provide the voice for actual Grumpy Cat (real name: Tardar Sauce) in a Lifetime Christmas special! Who knew people still cared about Grumpy Cat? Moreover, who knew Lifetime made intentionally funny programs?

John Malkovich has portrayed a plethora of characters over the years and now he’s taken on the stars of famous photographs in some cool recreated shots by Sandro Miller:

 

 

See them all here.

As “fannibals” of the artfully demented Bryan Fuller spectacle await the next course of NBC’s Hannibal, we get a taste of what’s to come. Whereas the first season focused on French cuisine, pulling episode titles from traditional French courses, and the second did the same with Japanese fare, it appears Season Three will be Italian, judging by Fuller’s tweet of the first episode’s script, titled “Antipasto.” We last saw Hannibal (in one of the most insane episodes of any show ever) on a plane to France — perhaps this season finds him in Italy? With the possibility that nearly every character on the show is dead, maybe this season will totally flip the script and just become the creepiest cooking show of all time. I can see it now: “Today on Eating Hannibal, we have a special guest joining Chef Lecter. Please welcome Bobby Flay! Well, parts of Bobby Flay…”

If you like miniature things, animal videos and eating, you are one of billions of people who use the Internet. Also, you may be familiar with the tiny hamster that eats tiny versions of human treats, like in this video, where he enjoys an authentic Mexican feast of tiny burritos.

Well, Tiny Hamster is back, this time taking on competitive eater Takeru Kobayashi:

You may also be familiar with Jasmine Tridevil.

In a shocking turn of events, it seems that Total Recall prostitute wannabe claiming to have a third breast added to her body is a FRAUD. Doctors agree the surgery would be nearly impossible to pull off and my eyeballs agree that the shit looks fake. Drag queens have been using prosthetic breast plates for years! Jasmine clearly will go to any lengths to get a TV show — besides actually getting a third boob, I guess. And she appears to have a past of creating stunts for media attention. Ya been Snopes’d, girl!

And speaking of Total Recall, the star of the movie’s 2012 remake Colin Farrell has been confirmed as one of the many speculated-about leads for the second season of HBO's True Detective. Vince Vaughn was also confirmed as another star in an HBO press release yesterday. Farrell will play Ray Velcoro, "a compromised detective whose allegiances are torn between his masters in a corrupt police department and the mobster who owns him,” according to the release. Vaughn will portray Frank Semyon, “a career criminal in danger of losing his empire when his move into legitimate enterprise is upended by the murder of a business partner.” Both actors had been rumored to star in the show for a while now, so if they’re confirmed we can probably expect Taylor Kitsch to formally come aboard soon. The show will also feature a female lead, after getting some kickback for the lack of leading ladies in Season One. Mad Men’s Elizabeth Moss and Michelle Forbes (aka Maryanne the maenad from True Blood) are two possibilities from the rumor mill — they’re also listed on the show’s IMDB page, along with Kitsch, but that’s not offish — and supposedly Rosario Dawson, Jessica Biel, Abigail Spencer, Malin Akerman, Oona Chaplin, Jaimie Alexander and Brit Marling have all read for a part. Fast & Furious director Justin Lin will direct the first two episodes, which should make us all nervous. Awesome director of Season One Cary Joji Fukunaga won an Emmy for his work; this season will feature several different directors.

Kirsten Dunst stars in a lovely “short film” that actually more of a PSA about how not to be a weird dick to celebrities and other humans in general.

ASPIRATIONAL from Matthew Frost on Vimeo.

Love this but seriously, do celebrities really use Uber?

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<![CDATA[I Just Can't Get Enough]]>

IJCGE is finally back after a hiatus to work on other piling projects — including this week’s cover story on the locally filmed reality show Rowhouse Showdown. Check it out here! And yes, even my serious projects and cover stories require Facebook stalking and marathon TV-watching. Deal with it.

So what’s happened in the last few weeks? Everybody is married now, so we missed that. Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie; Ashlee Simpson and Evan “Diana Ross’ Son” Ross; Donnie "Not Mark" Wahlburg and Jenny McCarthy; Gabrielle Union and Dwyane Wade (clearly getting more yawn-worthy as we go down the list) — even Vincent Kartheiser and Alexis Bledel, aka Pete Campbell and Rory Gilmore, tied the knot — the most important couple of them all. Congrats! Everyone else: you don’t matter.

Recently the Lifetime network had a meeting where they brainstormed which piece of 1990s nostalgia they should desecrate on air. They couldn’t decide between Saved By the Bell and Clueless, so they just decided to do two TV movies in one week: The Unauthorized Saved By the Bell Story on Labor Day and The Brittany Murphy Story this Saturday. Lifetime’s SBTB flick promised lots of juicy dramatization — it’s based on Dustin Diamond's 2009 book Behind the Bell. But juicy it was not, and the entire thing was narrated by Screech of all people (who, according to this depiction, liked to drink vodka during karate lessons)! Terrible.

Probably not as terrible as a Brittany Murphy movie, though. Don’t get me wrong, I love me some B-Murph. Uptown Girls is one of my favorite movies. Her voice acting for King of the Hill’s Luanne was flawless. And, obviously, her character Tai from Clueless is a voice of the generation. But the poor woman died nearly five years ago, can’t we let her rest in piece and respect her family? Oh, we can’t?

Well, here:

Yes, that’s a somber-girly version of the Night at the Roxbury song. Lifetime has two more forever-too-soon biopics in the works: one on Aaliyah and another on Whitney Houston.

Guy Fieri and his Flavortown mobile stopped in Cincinnati in July to film his Food Network show Diners, Drive-ins and Dives. It was revealed last week that an entire episode will be devoted to restaurants in Over-the-Rhine. Typically, the show features a few different restaurants in three different cities. In “One Street Wonders,” airing Oct. 10, Fieri visits Taste of Belgium, Senate and Bakersfield. His visit to Northside’s Melt will air Sept. 12; his stop at Island Frydays in Corryville airs Sept. 26. Here’s a sneak preview of the episode:

Fall is just around the corner (if that’s what you want to call that 10-day period between the excruciating sauna of summer and frozen hell of winter), which means two things: people are less judgmental about the choice to remain mostly indoors and lots of TV shows are coming back. A match made in heaven!

This week brings the premieres of the final seasons of Boardwalk Empire (Sunday) and Sons of Anarchy (Tuesday). Go here for a full fall TV preview.

New movie trailers to hit the Interwebz: You’re Not You stars Emmy Rossum as an inexperienced but determined caregiver to Hilary Swank’s character, a woman diagnosed with ALS; Jon Stewart’s directorial debut Rosewater follows a journalist (Gael García Bernal) detained and interrogated in Iran.

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<![CDATA[I Just Can't Get Enough]]>

Many longtime Parks and Recreation fans are well aware of actor Chris Pratt’s greatness, but sometimes it takes the combination of a personal trainer and a blockbuster action flick for an actor to get big mainstream recognition. Sure, Parks and Rec’s Andy Dwyer may be all buff now, but Pratt is definitely not just relying on that body — he’s even exploring other aspects of the entertainment business, like rapping!

When on a radio show recently, Pratt talked about living in a van in Hawaii, smoking weed every day and blasting The Chronic 2001 on repeat. (Yes, Chris Pratt really was basically Andy Dwyer and yes, this story will fuel fantasies for years to come.) Thankfully, all that weed fog didn’t cloud his memory, as he proved by rapping the better half “Forgot About Dre” from memory, to perfection.

Between his actually good rap skills and his obvious musical talent as seen on Parks (Mouse Rat for life!), Pratt could probably be a successful musician. I can hear it now: Matchbox 20 meets Eminem…

The titular line from The Killers’ song “Are We Humans or Are We Dancer” has been dubbed the weirdest lyric ever. Am I alone in just now realizing “dancer” wasn’t plural? Am I alone in giving this any thought at all?

On Aug. 1, Netflix dumped a bunch of streaming movies and shows — due to the constantly expiring contracts with distributors — but several more were added. You may have to find other ways to watch Airplane!, Paper Moon and Heartbreaker, but you can now stream Air Bud, Kinky Boots, the Rocky franchise, Spice World and several other movies, plus new show releases throughout the month.

Lea Michele is latest on the growing list of random celebrities appearing in the final season of Sons of Anarchy. The squeaky-clean Glee star joins the likes of Marilyn Manson and Courtney Love.

Peep this vid of Jax Teller himself, Charlie Hunnam, addressing Comic Con fans from the Sons set.

And to think he was thisclose to starring in 50 Shades 

Beyoncé dropped a remix of “Flawless” this weekend. The track features Nicki Minaj — fresh album art azz controversy — and in it Bey acknowledges, for the first time, the infamous elevator incident of 2014. Quel scandale!

Peep these popular movies and TV shows rendered as Little Golden Book-style children’s reads.

So Marnie from Girls is going to play Peter Pan in NBC’s live staging of the musical. Really not sure how I feel about this, especially considering my confusion over always casting a woman to play the man-boy. Does it somehow make it less disturbing that the character is an adult, acts like a kid, and takes children from their room at night? Like, "Hey, guys, this actually isn’t scary because Peter Pan is really a lady!”? I mean, far be it from me to insist on more men onscreen — There just aren’t enough! — but all the guys I know with Peter Pan Complex are far from impish, androgynous waifs.

OK, what the shit is happening here:

Katy Perry’s videos always carry a strong WTF factor, but “This Is How We Do” hurt my brain/eyeballs. There’s a twerking ice cream cone, random nods to famous works of art, inedible tacos and pizza (the nerve!) and a sprinkling of cultural appropriation. Basically I haven’t felt as hypnotized, confused and old since I watched “We Won’t Stop” for the first time. Get off my lawn, girls!

New movie trailers to hit the Interwebz: Disney musical Into the Woods starring Meryl Streep, Anna Kendrick and Chris Pine; dark comedy Birdman, which centers on an actor (Michael Keaton), known for his superhero role in films, as he attempts to create a Broadway play; and Christopher Nolan's Interstellar: wormholes and space travel with Matthew McConaughey, Anne Hathaway and Jessica Chastain.

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<![CDATA[I Just Can't Get Enough]]> Move over, Vincent Chase! DC Comics’ Aquaman will come to life on the big screen in the form of Jason Momoa, aka Game of Thrones’ Khal Drogo, aka My Sun and Stars. Aquaman/Momoa was recently added to the cast of Batman v. Superman: Dawn of Justice, joining Amy Adams (Lois Lane), Gal Gadot (Wonder Woman), Jesse Eisenberg (Lex Luthor) and, of course, Henry Cavill (Superman) and Ben Affleck (Batman) in the 2016 epic comic feature.

Just for fun, here’s our pre-Thrones and Aquaman Momoa singing in a scene from his Baywatch days.

What a voice! I had no idea Jason Momoa was the lead singer of the Crash Test Dummies

Miles Ahead filming kicked off Monday. The most recent film to be shot locally stars Don Cheadle as Jazz legend Miles Davis and focuses on the musician’s five-year “silent period,” leading to his 1969 record In a Silent Way. Ewan McGregor and Michael Stuhlbarg (Boardwalk Empire) also star. Scenes will be filmed in dozens of local locations. Movie crews were seen today in Northside, while I caught Cheadle in a bright blue suit topped with Davis’ signature unkempt 'fro filming at Seventh and Elm streets Monday afternoon. Cheadle is making the film with the help of Indiegogo funding.

Many of the donation prizes for the film have sold out, but there are still some perks left — for example, for $100 you can catch an advance screening of the film, where The Cheadz (that’s my nickname for him now that we’re basically friends) will be in attendance. He’ll also do a Q&A after the movie. Pretty cool I guess, but in “What are we doing with our lives?” crowdfunding news, this Columbus, Ohio-based potato salad Kickstarter currently has more than $53,000 in pledges. And it’s open for 24 more days. It’s original goal was $10. If you’re confused about how a crowdfunding site relates to picnic side dishes, this description from the project should help:

I'm making potato salad.

Basically I'm just making potato salad. I haven't decided what kind yet.

It’s pretty hilarious until you realize the funds raised for this joke of a project could actually pay off your student and car loans and that no joke Kickstarter you could create will ever be as successful. So just give up already.

So I know 2002 will soon be calling, asking for its pop culture references back, but this delicious parody/remix of Eminem's “Lose Yourself” via Gizmodo is winning the Internet right now.

The headline Millennials have been waiting for is making its rounds on every news site and blog everywhere: Netflix Will Pay You to Watch Netflix.

Harry Potter fans will be happy to know author J.K. Rowling has published a new story in the series on her site Pottermore. The new Potter tale catches up with the wizard and his pals in their adulthood. This is Rowling’s first Harry-centric piece since publishing the series’ final novel seven years ago.

New movie trailers to hit the Interwebz: Jimi: All Is by My Side, starring André "3000" Benjamin as Mr. Hendrix; Before I Go To Sleep, with Nicole Kidman, Colin Firth and Mark Strong in what sounds like Memento meets 50 First Dates; and Horrible Bosses 2. Because Hollywood.

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Here at IJCGE, we’re in the business of talking trash and making jokes, not patting ourselves on the back. That being said, some readers might be interested to know that this blog was recognized last week at the Cincinnati Society for Professional Journalists’ Excellence in Journalism awards, which we assure you sounds incredibly fancier that it actually is. I Just Can’t Get Enough nabbed first place for Lifestyle Reporting — just one of several awards CityBeat received. So rest assured, when you come here for the latest Beyoncé scoop or completely biased awards show commentary, you’re utilizing an award-winning source.

And speaking of Queen Bey — who just topped Forbes’ Most Powerful list (Bow down, Oprah) — locals got the rare opportunity to breathe the same air as Mrs. Carter last weekend (just kidding, of course — we all know Bey is an alien robot goddess that does not require oxygen like us plebs). Jay Z and Beyoncé’s On the Run tour made its second stop at Great American Ballpark Saturday; read our review here. Spoiler Alert: It was the best thing that has ever happened.

Part of the joy of being a kid is the adventure. It’s all about having fun, throwing caution to the wind! Ten-year-olds don’t worry much about safety or the fact that death is lurking behind every corner. Some people believe we, as a society, are too overprotective of our children — we shelter them. But across generations we can all probably agree we did some pretty fucked up shit in our youth we’d never dream to attempt now. For kids around the northern New Jersey area between 1978 and 1996, Action Park in Vernon, N.J., played a role in those haunting memories of destructive youth decisions. Check out this short, highly entertaining doc on “the world’s most dangerous theme park.”


The Most Insane Amusement Park Ever (Full Length) by insane-amusement-park

So we’ve all had a good laugh about this defunct attraction (except all those people who died or got hurt). Well, surprise, bitch! Action Park has reopened, and everyone’s freaking out about it.

Tim & Eric fans: Check out the Steve Brule Name Generator, for your health! (I got Jranice Kringus, which is what I will answer to exclusively from this point on.)

In other news, apparently we’re still talking about Grumpy Cat. The Internet-famous feline was recently united with her doppelganger, Peter Dinklage, and is also in a new Honey Nut Cheerios commercial. Nelly, you’re in good company! #beegotswag #whyisthishappening

Remember “First Kiss,” that hot black-and-white viral vid with strangers making out (that was actually somehow a clothing ad)? Well, now there’s “The Slap,” a hands-on response to Wren’s kissing project. It features Haley Joel Osment so it is obviously amazing.

Between recording what’s become known as a rape anthem, pissing off Marvin Gaye’s family and probably cheating on/breaking up with/desperately trying to win back wife Paula Patton, Robin Thicke is generally disliked by most humans at this point. So VH1 thought this was a good opportunity to open up Twitter to questions for the singer. Apparently they never heard about #AskRKelly. It went about as well as you’d expect.

New movie trailers to hit the Interwebz: Fury, a World War II action drama from David Ayer (End of Watch, Training Day) starring Brad Pitt, Charlie from Perks of Being a Wallflower and a way-too-method Shia LaBeouf; odd-couple comedy St. Vincent that has nothing to do with Annie Clark starring Bill Murray, Chris O'Dowd, Naomi Watts and Melissa McCarthy in a role that doesn't appear to be that same sloppy, stupid fat lady caricature; and dark comedy The Skeleton Twins, in which Bill Hader and Kristen Wiig play recently reunited troubled twins.

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The Onion spoofs your news. Now, the folks behind the satire site (and frequent IJCGE reference A.V. Club) are spoofing most people’s actual go-to source for world happenings — BuzzFeed. ClickHole has the whole BuzzFeed game down, from its font and design to its content: Click-bait headlines? Check. Obscurely themed lists and photos?  Check. Quizzes to annoy the last shred of living hell out of your Facebook friends? Yup! Will ClickHole keep up the gig and continue to satirize the Internet for the foreseeable future or is this just a limited launch sponsored by Jack Link's? One thing is for sure: Get ready for plenty of confused old people and dumb teens posting the site without any knowledge of the joke. Just check the cringe-worthy oblivious comments on its Facebook page!

That being said, BuzzFeed probably isn’t going anywhere any time soon, either. Who else is going to point out to me this hilarious goof from the music video for my teen romance anthem, “Dilemma” by Nelly and Kelly (Rowland)?

OK Go is known for their creative music videos. They also must hold Gob Bluth close to their hearts, because their latest offering is all about illusions!

Who wouldn’t love receiving a phone call from their favorite musician, movie star or public figure? Celebcalls.com charges a mere four bucks to have a star like Justin Bieber or NASCAR’s Tony Stewart record either a call or voicemail greeting for a loved one. Just pick your celebrity speaker, plug in a few details about your friend and a celebot spits out a greeting that I’m pretty sure is just real sound bites cut and pasted back together like a ransom letter for your cousin’s birthday. So thoughtful!

Biebz tweeted about the service, suggesting it as a Father’s Day gift. I don’t hate my dad, but if you do, other celebs include Dr. Phil McGraw, Mike Tyson, Snoop Dog and 16-year-old YA author and least interesting of the Kardashian Klan, Kylie Jenner, who’s next gig is an in-store appearance at a Pac Sun.

There’s an NWA biopic in the works, and the roles of Dr. Dre, Eazy E and Ice Cube have been cast. Straight Outta Compton will star theater actor Marcus Callender as Dre, newcomer Jason Mitchell as E, and O’Shea Jackson Jr. — Ice Cube’s son — playing his dad Cube.

R.I.P. IkeaHackers. The creator of the how-to blog that features alternate uses for Ikea furniture has received a cease and desist letter from the Swedish furnishing giants. By June 23, the site must devoid of all advertising space (which creator “Jules Yap” started selling when the popular site became a full-time job) or the site must relocate sans Ikea branding. It’s a pretty shitty move on Ikea’s part, considering the site is essentially a love letter to the mega-store and its hackable, mashable DIY products that probably inspired many to voyage to their local Ikea warehouse, drop some bucks and create some hacks of their own. Notable IkeaHacks include the EXPEDIT bar and the KNUFF transformable coffee table.

I’ll admit I’m a sucker for poppy music video recreations starring unlikely dudes, filmed in their basements. But the following vid is great in its own right because this scantily clad heavy-set gentleman werks better in his natural habitat than Britney does in an professional music video with an actual budget.

Brit is an icon, but I’d much rather pay to see this guy perform at Planet Hollywood Las Vegas.

The English language continues its decent into a hodgepodge of text message shorthand and cartoon images as Emoji releases 250 new symbols to the Emojipedia this July. Peep the whole list here (unfortunately you will have to settle for reading descriptions as the actual Emoji images aren’t available yet); highlights include a middle finger, a chipmunk, the Vulcan salute, a weightlifter and so so many office supplies.

The Game of Thrones finale simultaneously gave me life and sucked my soul away, so I’m feeling pretty fragile and won’t recap it. There are enough spoilers lurking across the Internet (including a major bomb about a particular character yet to be introduced…seriously, nothing is safe) — beware!

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<![CDATA[I Just Can't Get Enough]]>

FX biker drama Sons of Anarchy will embark in its final ride this fall, after a game-changing penultimate season. The show has featured a few guest stars from the music world, including Henry Rollins and Dave Navarro. Next on that list is a surprising name — Marilyn Manson.

Manson will play a recurring role in the final season: Ron Tully, a white supremacist behind bars who could prove to be a useful player for Jax. Hello, nightmares!

It turns out Manson is far from the heartless characters he portrays on stage or screen — he reportedly picked up the role as a tribute to his dad, who is a big fan of the show.

Sons has been such a big part of my life, as well as my father’s,” he told Variety. “So I was determined to make him proud by being involved in what will probably be remembered as the most amazing piece of television cinema. After all, the very heart of SOA is about that relationship.” Aww, Marilyn!

Marilyn Manson is not, for the record, Paul from The Wonder Years. We now know this as fact because the cast of the family classic recently reunited to promote a Wonder Years DVD set coming soon. We all know Winnie (Danica McKellar) went on to become a super hot mega genius and Kevin (Fred Savage) is still involved with show business (he's been a director and producer on Always Sunny and lots of other comedies), but what ever happened to Paul?

As you can see, grown-up Paul (Josh Saviano) looks nothing like Manson today. But I guess we never have seen them in the same place at the same time…

While we’re taking a walk down memory lane, O-Town is the latest early-‘00s boy band to reunite, though at least 15 women will be upset to discover Ashley Parker Angel, “The Cute One,” is no longer a part of the band. If you recall, the band was formed as part of 2000's Making the Band, a show that acknowledged the inauthentic, assembly-line nature of manufacturing boy bands while also...manufacturing a boy band. O-Town was assembled by Lou Pearlman, the manager behind the Backstreet Boys, *NSync, LFO, Aaron Carter and other Pop acts of the 1990s and early 2000s.

Fun Fact: Pearlman was sued by every band/performer he worked with except one, and is now serving a 25-year sentence for charges of conspiracy, money laundering and making false statements during a bankruptcy proceeding. Great job!

Tennis star Serena Williams “crashed” a wedding last week, because I guess being asked to take a photo with a bride and groom constitutes wedding crashing.

It would be a fun memory to run into a celeb on your big day, but I don’t know if I’d really want my new spouse to get an eyeful of this right after committing eternally to me. Oh well, you know what they say: If you choose to get married on a public beach, you just might get crashed by a bangin' pro tennis player in animal print. (Also: Are leotards the new swimsuits?)

The Bottle Boys are a Danish performance group that use bottles in various ways to play songs. Their latest cover, of Michael Jackson’s “Billie Jean,” is going viral. Check it out.

The crew has competed on Britain’s Got Talent using beer bottles, water jugs and other containers to recreate popular songs.

Two badass babes have signed on to the upcoming Star Wars Episode VII. Lupita N’yongo — Academy Award-winning actress from 12 Years a Slave and People’s “Most Beautiful” person of the year — and Gwendoline Christie — better known as Brienne of Tarth from Game of Thrones — are both slated to star in the latest Star Wars chapter, along with 600 other amazing actors.

Also in movie news: From Edward to Indy? Robert Pattinson will likely take the role of Indiana Jokes for the next reboot.

Now, here’s Chance The Rapper performing the theme song to my favorite educational cartoon, Arthur, at Sasquatch! Music Festival:

(Thanks for the tip, Brooke!)

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With Jenny Slate’s new, ahem, “abortion comedy” Obvious Child coming to theaters (no word on a Cincy screening yet), I could highlight many examples of the comedian’s genius: Marcel the Shell with Shoes On; Mona Lisa from Parks and Rec; “PubLIZity” on Kroll Show; even the f-bomb heard ‘round the world on her SNL debut. But I truly cannot get enough of Catherine, one of the strangest and most hilarious little web series I’ve ever watched! Take about 30 minutes and watch this gem from beginning to end. Then lather, rinse, repeat.

Nearly 20 years after Tupac Shakur’s death, a police officer present at the scene that night has come forward to reveal the rapper’s last words: “Fuck you.” OK then.

Conan O’Brien is a true talent, and I love the guy but I’ve hardly tuned in to his show since his move to TBS (kind of like how I “support” local restaurants but still just eat Taco Bell anyway sometimes). But I did tune in recently to catch what is apparently a recurring bit: Clueless Gamer. Conan, not a big video gamer, tests out a new or classic game, mocking various aspects to comedic results. Last week Conan test-drove Watch Dogs, which was released across platforms Tuesday.

Conan and I are about the same speed when it comes to video games. He can’t help but focus on the futuristic fashion choices and unrealistic aspects or run over a sidewalk of people with a stolen UPS truck or, in turn, inevitably perturb avid gamers.

Bill Murray. Dude seems to be living the life of a retired playboy, despite the fact that he’s still very active in Hollywood. Besides being a pretty much universally loved actor and comedian, in his off time he’s campaigning to be inducted in the Cool Guy Hall of Fame. In his latest move, Murray addressed a bachelor party at a Charleston steakhouse on finding “the one,” and then led the group in lifting the groom-to-be into the air. Watch the magic here. Next up: Bill Murray delivers baby in out-of-service elevator, fashions a diaper out of own T-shirt.

Ever noticed how Red Hot Chili Peppers drummer Chad Smith bears a striking resemblance to Will Ferrell? According to Ferrell, the two are confused so often it’s beginning to become and issue. The doppelgangers met last week to decide once and for all who was who, and which was the better drummer on The Tonight Show (aka Where Celebrities Go to Act a Fool). The results were predictably outstanding:

Fans of True Detective are chomping at the bit for any clues about next season’s stars and settings. Recent rumors stated Jessica Chastain was offered a lead, but the Zero Dark Thirty actress claims that isn’t the case. Thankfully series creator Nic Pizzolatto revealed a few details about Season Two: This round — a completely new case, setting and cast — will feature three leads instead of two (Matthew McConaughey and Woody Harrelson starred in Season One), it will focus on “hard women, bad men and the secret occult history of the United States transportation system,” and the action will take place in a California city — somewhere more off-the-beaten path than L.A. Considering the bit of pushback regarding the lack of substantial female characters last season, we can likely expect more focus on at least one woman.

The AMC network bid farewell to two beloved characters recently (spoilers coming). Porkchop — Chihuahua, star of Small Town Security and HBIC of JJK Security — was put to sleep in last week's episode of the reality show. And in "not so real but also pretty sad" news, Mad Men character Bert Cooper passed away in Sunday's mid-season finale. The SC&P co-founder died right after watching the historic Apollo 11 moon landing of 1969 — but don't worry, actor Robert Morse is still going strong. Coop bid farewell to Don Draper — and viewers — in a sweet, surreal and theatrical final scene.

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<![CDATA[I Just Can’t Get Enough…Oscars]]>

And just like that, “Awards Season” comes to a close. Does anyone else think it went out with more of a bore than a bang?

Sunday’s Oscars were preceded by the Film Independent Spirit Awards Saturday. I was introduced to this indie movie celebration last year and was pleasantly surprised by the fun, fast-and-loose nature of the show in addition to its highlighting of lesser-known, smaller-budget films compared to the Academy Awards. Maybe it was due to Jameson no longer sponsoring the event/getting everyone wasted; perhaps it was the fact that many of the winners went on to receive Oscars in similar categories the very next day. Either way, I found this year’s show, hosted by Patton Oswalt, to be just a little blah. See for yourself here.

Sunday night was not much of a departure from that feeling. I do love me some Ellen — she can always deliver consistently funny material everyone can relate to. She picked on stars without being too mean and rocked some fab suits, but it takes more than that to keep me awake through a 15-hour production like the Oscars.

But there were plenty of both touching and funny moments throughout the night. Supporting actor and actress winners, Jared Leto and Lupita Nyong’o, delivered thoughtful, emotional acceptance speeches (while looking freaking gorge). Leto — who I still can’t believe was the oldest nominee in that category — spoke about his mother’s inspiring perseverance, the conflicts in Venezuela and Ukraine and the victims of AIDS as well as discrimination (both central themes of Dallas Buyers Club). He also looked sharp in a cream tux with burgundy tie and the most coveted ombré locks of any human man.

And, clearly, the 42-year-old gets his looks from his hot ass mother. But seriously, maybe we should consider the fact that Jordan Catalano is a vampire. Any thoughts, Pharrell?

Speaking of, Pharrell performed his Oscar-nominated hit, "Happy," in what appeared to be a legit GAP ad circa 2003.

Lupita Nyong’o, who won for her role in 12 Years a Slave, also gave a heartfelt acceptance speech. Everyone is crushing on Lupita right now, myself included, but let’s talk about her equally attractive brother, Peter.