There are certain topics that newspaper headline writers enjoy a lot, the type of stories that allow for the creation of puns so funny that every elderly person who can still read 48-point font will laugh until they pee their pants (and then hopefully laugh about that). One such topic offered itself to The Enquirer today — the possible legalization of medical marijuana — and its online editor came through with the following: “Pot ballot measure now a joint effort.”  

BMX riders these days are doing some ridiculous stunts (some dude recently did a triple backflip — go ahead, check out the video on the Internet). This weekend local company Misled Clothing, along with Beechmont Scion, will offer a chance for those who have only seen such ridiculousness on TV to have an up-close-and-personal view at the second-annual Big Ed's BMX Bash.  

Every construction manager understands that sometimes there’s just no way around taking a break from the job — between bad weather, lost materials or John Kasich, something is bound to slow down production. Highway workers outside of Columbus today found out the hard way that just about anything can send you home early — hardhat and lunchmeat sandwich in hand.  

It’s refreshing to hear Cincinnati City Councilpersons discuss forward-thinking concepts — remember when they figured out a way to get the garbage picked up for free so no one had to pay for it? Buncha geniuses.   

There are some things that business owners don’t need to fully understand — where their products come from, how much the excessive packaging will affect the Earth in 2050, whether or not too much contact with what they’re selling can cause mice to see the future (fine, be skeptical!). One such question will soon be answered by a new University of Cincinnati study: whether or not putting a sign in front of a business actually attracts customers.  

Steve Chabot banned cameras from a town hall meeting in Green Township for “security purposes.” Chabot then advised residents to fight a new plan to add public housing units to the neighborhood, though his speech was reportedly cut short when he saw a guy playing “Angry Birds” on a cell phone and thought he was recording a video and laughing.  

We were happy today to have one more reason not to go to Amelia: We prefer to avoid places that don’t have police forces. Village leaders have already asked the county sheriff if he will help out if any teenagers figure out that the high school’s football helmets look like anarchy signs and start freaking out.  

Ohio State University football coach Jim Tressel today resigned amid investigations into rule violations by his players, only to have the school and its fans respond with a heartfelt :’(. Tressel, who is best known for wearing sweater vests, beating Michigan and pretending to be the dad in Family Ties, said his departure is what’s best for the university.  

It’s rare that scientists are able to figure out exactly when an invasive species was introduced to an area — there is generally more than one person at a time who thinks it’s funny to see what a weird animal from Australia will do if you let it loose in your own neighborhood (probably get killed by cats, maybe eat a bird). The Enquirer today reported that one such not-so-local species — the European wall lizard — followed a different path to Cincinnati.  

Do you know someone who insists on carrying a concealed weapon in public? Probably the type of person willing to jump to action at the first sign of injustice, using his or her weapon only for good and never accidentally shooting anyone or raging?