I recently had the opportunity to sit down with myself over dinner at a midtown bistro. Being the same person, we arrived simultaneously and were seated together at a table for one. While savoring a  

I was having breakfast when the authorities burst into my apartment. "Robert W--," the official in charge said, "you will please to come with us." His manner was so utterly threatening, it's possibl  

Reprinted with permission from the program for TempoTantrum, An Evening of Multiform Movement and Dance, presented at the Armour® Potted Meat Perform-ing Arts Center, Sept. 24-26, 2004. Chore  

FRITO-LAY, ABSOLUT TO LAUNCH NEW LINE OF "SPIRITED" SNACKS (Aug. 24, 2004; Dallas, TX) Frito-Lay, the global leader in the manufacture and sale of snack food products, announced today that, in coop  

Mom had no training as a barber. Neither was she a hairstylist. Fact is, Mom never could and still can't shave her underarms and get them to "come out even." Yet, up until I was 5, Mom cut my hair.  

Dear Valued Customer, It happens all the time. To busy people. To smart people. To important people. In other words, to people like you. Imagine: You're anxiously awaiting a certain phone call. Ho  

As you might recall, at a certain point during the presidential campaign of 2000 we were informed by the people who inform us of such things that Soccer Moms, a newly identified voting bloc, would   

In 1999, the U.S. Mint launched the 50 State Quarters Program. The purpose of the program is to honor each state by featuring, on a quarter's reverse, a design created by and representative of said  

Some background. In February 1995, my weekly column, Pseudoquasiesque (an Anasazi word meaning, "I serve you tea steeped from my loincloth") had its debut in this paper. Over the course of its run,  

Not terribly long ago, I was quite the baseball fan. I went to 15, 20 Reds games a year, smug in the knowledge that, rather than lazing at home on my ass drinking cheap beer watching ESPN like