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Cover Story: Who's Zoomin' Who?

The Bob Woodiwiss Interview by Bob Woodiwiss

0 Comments · Wednesday, September 29, 2004
I recently had the opportunity to sit down with myself over dinner at a midtown bistro. Being the same person, we arrived simultaneously and were seated together at a table for one. While savoring a  

Cover Story: Somewhere Between Red and Orange

Excerpt from Keys to Uncomfortable Living

0 Comments · Wednesday, September 29, 2004
I was having breakfast when the authorities burst into my apartment. "Robert W--," the official in charge said, "you will please to come with us." His manner was so utterly threatening, it's possibl  

Bio Hazardous

0 Comments · Wednesday, September 29, 2004
Reprinted with permission from the program for TempoTantrum, An Evening of Multiform Movement and Dance, presented at the Armour® Potted Meat Perform-ing Arts Center, Sept. 24-26, 2004. Chore  

Bagging the Youth Market

0 Comments · Wednesday, August 25, 2004
FRITO-LAY, ABSOLUT TO LAUNCH NEW LINE OF "SPIRITED" SNACKS (Aug. 24, 2004; Dallas, TX) Frito-Lay, the global leader in the manufacture and sale of snack food products, announced today that, in coop  

Shorn of Plenty

0 Comments · Wednesday, July 28, 2004
Mom had no training as a barber. Neither was she a hairstylist. Fact is, Mom never could and still can't shave her underarms and get them to "come out even." Yet, up until I was 5, Mom cut my hair.  

Your Line Is Not Dead

0 Comments · Wednesday, June 30, 2004
Dear Valued Customer, It happens all the time. To busy people. To smart people. To important people. In other words, to people like you. Imagine: You're anxiously awaiting a certain phone call. Ho  

Jock the Vote

0 Comments · Wednesday, May 26, 2004
As you might recall, at a certain point during the presidential campaign of 2000 we were informed by the people who inform us of such things that Soccer Moms, a newly identified voting bloc, would   

Ahhh, Mint-y Fresh

0 Comments · Wednesday, April 28, 2004
In 1999, the U.S. Mint launched the 50 State Quarters Program. The purpose of the program is to honor each state by featuring, on a quarter's reverse, a design created by and representative of said  

Bobshead Revisited

0 Comments · Wednesday, March 31, 2004
Some background. In February 1995, my weekly column, Pseudoquasiesque (an Anasazi word meaning, "I serve you tea steeped from my loincloth") had its debut in this paper. Over the course of its run,  

Cover Story: Death (Or Damn Near It) in the Afternoon

Wherein a former baseball fan finds his disinterest rekindled

0 Comments · Thursday, June 27, 2002
Not terribly long ago, I was quite the baseball fan. I went to 15, 20 Reds games a year, smug in the knowledge that, rather than lazing at home on my ass drinking cheap beer watching ESPN like