Drop those pickles and ice cream, ladies! Becoming Mom Spa in Mason is looking for the hottest pregnant gut in the Tristate for its Beautiful Belly Contest.
Knocked up chicks are encouraged to send in a photo of their lovely lady lumps, which will be displayed on the spa's Facebook page for public voting. Because that doesn't sound like it could go horrifyingly wrong.
For every vote on the photos, Becoming Mom will donate $1 to the March of Dimes. Prizes for top-voted bellies include gift certificates to The Polo Grille, Buy Buy Baby, Radiant Hair Removal (which you should probably think about before you submit a photo...) and other businesses. Becoming Mom will also crown Most Creative Belly Shot, Belly Shot that Best Represents the Journey to Motherhood and Most Beautiful Belly with $100 a pop.
Before MomsLikeMe.com hijacks this shit, I want to be clear. Being pregnant is totally cool (as long as you aren't a white trash idiot who learned the hard way that a pregnancy pact doesn't come with an MTV contract). I mean, you and a dude made a person! Holy shit, that's like one of the coolest things humans can do. And it's particularly special for women, because they get to let the thing simmer in 'em, pop it out and then feed it with milk their own bodies produce. That's hella eco-friendly. Pregnant women even look cool most of the time.
Terrifying other times.
Motherhood should totally be celebrated. I don't think a pregnant woman needs to hide her belly under a tent dress by any means, but do you really have to go to Sears, strip down and get a portrait of yourself covering up your boobs and vag like you're some kind of bloated Venus? No amount of retouching in Photoshop is going to make you feel like you look like Demi.
Not pictured: a normal pregnant person
But I know what you're thinking. You're going the tasteful route: planning on the denim/white oxford ensemble?
What a unique idea!
And let's think about who's truly affected by a contest like this: the little tadpole inside. How's Junior gonna feel when he finds out mom whored him out on Facebook before he was even born? All this for a couple bones and some Greater's gift cards. It's bad enough you picked the kid's name off a Web site, then tweaked it to end with "-ayden."
But if you disagree, send your belly shot to email@example.com by April 22. Winners will be announced on - wait for it - Mothers Day. Aw!
This is the caliber of photo Becoming Mom is looking for, so, preggy ladies, take note:
Mariah Carey continues to set the bar high:
Let’s forget, for a second, about all of the talk surrounding Gregg Gillis, a.k.a. Girl Talk (a.k.a. this week's CityBeat cover star). Certainly in an era of Internet piracy and intensely important discussions of fair use doctrine, Gillis is at the forefront of pushing boundaries, both musically and legally. And Gillis also sticks out like a wonderfully sore thumb to those at the Federal Communications Commission and the like, that would have artists censored or denied their right to perform in the way they say fit.
However, at a live Girl Talk show, none of this matters.
Some critics of Republican presidential hopeful Rick Santorum said video footage of a speech at a campaign event shows him starting to utter a racial slur while referring to President Obama, then cutting himself off mid-word.
While speaking to a group of supporters in Wisconsin on Tuesday, Santorum said, “We know what the candidate, Barack Obama, was like. The anti-war, government nig--, uh…” before stopping abruptly, then adding, “America was, uh, a source for division around the world. And that what we were doing was wrong. We needed to pull out and we needed to pull back.”
Although the uncompleted word sure sounds like it began with “nig” and what Santorum said next in the sentence didn’t flow naturally with the other words, a campaign spokesman today denied that the uncompleted word was “nigger.”
In January Santorum told a crowd of supporters in Iowa that he didn’t “want to make black people’s lives better by giving them other people’s money.”
Here is the clip of Tuesday’s speech. The remark causing controversy is spoken around the 34:30 mark. You can decide for yourself.
Jesse James Dupree is the lead singer of Jackyl, a metal band from Kennesaw, Ga., that's performing Friday at Bogart's. Jackyl was formed back in 1990 and have given their audience eight studio albums along with two live offerings. Their biggest success came with their self-titled first studio album which went platinum in 1992.
“Black Wednesday” has become “Black Thursday.”
Layoffs continued for a second day at The Gannett Co.’s newspaper holdings, including The Cincinnati Enquirer. Because The Enquirer is so notoriously tight-lipped about the names or job titles of staffers who are let go, CityBeat is slowly confirming names from various sources and cobbling together a more complete list.
Passing gas is sometimes considered a reaction to a good meal from a satisfied consumer, but actually farts are made during the release of gas that your body produces during digestion. My farts however are starting to push my friends away. I have always farted throughout my life, like most people, but recently things have been getting out of control.
More than a year after the Showcase Cinemas inside Kenwood Towne Centre closed suddenly (which was preceded by the unfortunate shuttering of the plush, old-school Kenwood Twin across the street back in 1995), the local movie landscape gets a shot in the arm with the opening of the Kenwood Theatre(7815 Kenwood Road) on Friday.
Dennis Yost, the lead singer for the group Classic IV (known best for its indelible hit “Spooky”), passed away in Hamilton early Sunday morning. Though not a Cincinnati native, he had lived here for several years and was embraced by the local music community.
After previously teasing its inaugural lineup by announcing performers like Jane’s Addiction, Weezer, Death Cab for Cutie, Airborne Toxic Event, Manchester Orchestra and Gym Class Heroes, the Bunbury Music Festival today announced most of the remaining acts for the July 13-15 festival along the riverfront at Yeatman's Cove/Sawyer Point. There will reportedly be over 100 acts on six stages over the three days, so more acts will be announced.
Here's who's playing:
Friday, July 13
: Jane’s Addiction,
Airborne Toxic Event, Minus the Bear, O.A.R., Foxy Shazam, Ra Ra Riot
, LP, Matt Pryor, Reverend Peyton’s Big Damn Band, Ponderosa,
All Get Out
, The Minor Leagues, Lauren Mann, She Does Is Magic, Bo & the Locomotive, Tristen and Pet Clinic.
Saturday, July 14: Weezer, Gym Class Heroes, Manchester Orchestra, Grouplove, RJD2, Dan Deacon, Jukebox the Ghost, The Bright Light Social Hour, Kevin Devine, The Silent Comedy, Graffiti 6, 1,2,3, Secret Music , Messerly & Ewing, 500 Miles To Memphis, The Lions Rampant, Jeremy Pinnell & the 55’s, Wheels on Fire and Hotfox.
Sunday, July 15 : Death Cab for Cutie, City and Colour, Motion City Soundtrack, Guided By Voices , Margot & The Nuclear So & So’s, Good Old War, Lights, Will Hoge, Maps & Atlases, YAWN, Now, Now , Wussy, The Seedy Seeds and The Tillers.
Tickets are $46 for one day or $93 for a three-day pass. Click here for more details.
A couple of weeks ago, local indie publishing house Aurore Press released a book featuring memories and essays by people involved with the seminal local Punk club The Jockey Club. Stories for Shorty was feted with an in-store party at Shake It Records and a "Jockey Club Reunion" at the Southgate House, with reunited sets by The Thangs, The Reduced and SS-20 (who are still playing shows but were reportedly joined by original guitarist Pete Sturdevant). Check out some pics from the event here and be sure to pick up a book (while they last) to get a great impression of what Punk Rock was like in the Cincinnati area in the 1980s.
I missed my chance to put a submission in for the book, but I still wanted to write a few words about a club (and musical style) that meant a lot to my musical upbringing.