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by Jac Kern 09.11.2013
Posted In: TV/Celebrity, Humor, Movies, Culture at 01:27 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)
 
 
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I Just Can't Get Enough

Jac's roundup of pop culture news and Internet findings

Back-to-school shopping was always pretty fun as a kid, but for child divas of the ‘80s and ‘90s, Lisa Frank made school supplies more than just educational basics — they were Technicolor accessories you were allowed to bring to school! Lisa Frank produced folders, posters, backpacks, pencils, notebooks and other craft and school supplies in the ‘80s and ‘90s that featured vibrant, colorful characters. It's like a child-friendly acid trip come to life. As The Atlantic reveals below, Lisa Frank is actually a real person and, despite the fact that she is a very private person, she recently gave a brief promotional interview after Urban Outfitters bought her vintage stock. Check it out, take the hand of a rainbow tuxedoed panda and walk down memory lane (and look out for a young Mila Kunis!) as you peek into Lisa Frank Incorporated:


Today, as Americans and people across the world remember 9/11, concerned about a possible war between the United States and Syria, young people are left with one question: What rhymes with hug me? Yes, Robin Thicke's “Blurred Lines,” the song version of that friend who was really fun at a party but doesn't know when to throw the towel in and call a cab, features plenty of questionable lyrics, but "You wanna hug me/What rhymes with hug me" has turned the average Top 40 listener into a regular investigative reporter. What does rhyme with “hug me?!” Thankfully, the WRWHM lyric generator is here to help, with a variety of fun options. Unfortunately, if you’re a rhyme Nazi like myself, you’ll be disappointed to find many non-rhyming examples, similar to the assumed "fuck me" in the song. (He's inferring "fuck me," right? Right?!)

Fifty Shades of Grey, the Twilight fan fiction that made it OK for women to openly read shitty romance novels again (thank god!), has been on its way to the silver screen for a while now. All the while, fans have been speculating who would portray the book’s main characters, particularly the BDSM-loving Christian Grey. Well, wait no more, horny moms — Sons of Anarchy’s Charlie Hunnam will soon be the recipient of endless deliveries of cable ties and Lane Bryant panties, as he is officially the face of Mr. Grey. I guess this is a good move for him because every human with a vagina will throw their dollars and undies at anything Shades, but Jax Teller? Really? Taking on the role of Grey’s girl, Ana, is Dakota Johnson, daughter of Melanie Griffith and Don Johnson, who I’ve referred to as “the Stanford girl who slept with Justin Timberlake in The Social Network” more than once. Here are some peeps who turned down the roles.

Four years ago, Mac from Always Sunny (in Season Five’s “The World Series Defense”) wrote a very emotional, sticker-filled letter to Philadelphia Phillies’ second baseman Chase Utley. It’s been a long wait, but Utley finally responded.


Ever want to watch celebrities recount their first sexual encounters to your favorite Full House heartthrob? I know, you’ve been waiting for years. Finally, here’s Losing It With John Stamos.

Australian comedian Chris Lilley is back with a new project featuring one of fans’ favorite characters. For those unfamiliar with the comic chameleon that is Lilley, cancel all of your plans, log onto HBO Go (or borrow someone’s account) and watch Summer Heights High and Angry Boys (Lilley’s first series, We Can Be Heroes, is not available to stream anywhere as far as I can tell, but you should buy that shit if you can find it). Lilley makes these amazing mockumentary-style series in which he plays multiple characters, often different genders, ages and nationalities, and he does so in a way that is so realistic, poignant, raw and hilarious, you’d really have to think twice before calling it “drag” or “blackface” — he becomes these characters.

In Lilley’s upcoming series, he will reprise his role of Ja’mie King, prissy bitch supreme featured in WCBH and SHS. Ja'mie: Private School Girl will debut on HBO Nov. 24. Please enjoy this Ja’mie mash-up, you fugly povos.

And as we welcome on new series, we say goodbye to another: True Blood will end after its seventh season next summer. Bon Temps better go out with a bang. And by bang, I mean a barrage of full-frontals (Spoilers!).

 
 
by Jac Kern 08.06.2013
Posted In: TV/Celebrity, Movies, Music at 02:55 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)
 
 
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I Just Can't Get Enough

Jac's roundup of pop culture news and Internet findings

Think “selfies” were limited to teenagers at the mall food court, drunk girls at bars and an alarming amount of people in bathrooms? Broaden your scope to include law enforcement with Cop Selfies, which sadly also include plenty of toilet shots:


And even one with Nickelback’s Chad Kroeger.

Possibly more depressing than the fact that police make duckfaces, too? The Rich Kids of Instagram, what started as a blog highlighting the hashtagged lives of the young and privileged, are reportedly getting their own show.

Start jogging in place to raise those endorphins, because your mood is LIT’RALLY going to plummet when you hear this news: Pawnee’s Chris Traeger and Ann Perkins are leaving our lives as Rob Lowe and Rashida Jones will be exiting Parks and Rec mid-way through the upcoming sixth season. The hot-and-cold couple decided to make a baby in last season’s finale, so hopefully we’ll get to see Chris obsess over Ann and the baby’s health — I shudder to think about the gargantuan prenatal vitamin he’ll force down poor Ann Perkin’s throat — and the subsequent birth of the most attractive baby ever.

What angsty teen didn’t grow up with Daria, worshiping Ms. Morgendorffer’s monotonous snark, too-cool-for-school edge and perfect Doc Martins? Well, 10 years later, Daria’s back (NOT REALLY), in the flesh, for a Lawndale High reunion, in this faux movie trailer:


Ellen DeGeneres is hosting the Oscars! The funnylady, a 100 percent upgrade from last year’s host, Family Guy creator Seth MacFarland, confirmed the news on Twitter:


Everybody is happy about this because everybody obviously loves Ellen, except probably One Million Moms, who can all eat one million dicks for all I care. GO ELLEN.

The Doctor is in — Peter Capaldi will replace Matt Smith in Doctor Who, making him the 12th actor to portray The Doctor on the show, the longest-running sci-fi series. Capaldi is best known for his role on the British political satire The Thick of It (which inspired HBO’s Veep), which is available on Hulu. He steps in front of the camera as Doctor No. 12 this fall.

Time Warner Cable users have even more to complain about than usual as the provider has dropped CBS and Showtime “due to outrageous demands for programming.” This blackout does not result in a price cutback for customers and it especially sucks for people who just recently got into Ray Donovan.

Hey, Mumford & Sons have a new music video. Something look a little off to you?

Nah.

Comedy Central Roasts are generally reserved for washed up celebs and veteran comics, but the network is gonna try something new with the Roast of James Franco. Hosted by BFF Seth Rogen, the roast is sure to draw in an even bigger, younger audience. Yes, we all love it when Seth and James get together (see: the last decade), but the real laughs will come when the seasoned roasters sink their teeth in ole Franco.

There are two types of people who spend too much time on the Internet. People who troll comments, who need to have their toenails removed one by one, and people who do this, who should be showered in champagne.

Via BuzzFeed:

 
 
by Jac Kern 06.25.2013
Posted In: TV/Celebrity, Humor, Movies at 03:10 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)
 
 
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I Just Can't Get Enough

Jac's roundup of pop culture news and Internet findings

James Gandolfini, who rose to icon status with his leading role in The Sopranos, died Wednesday in Italy from a heart attack. He was 51 years old. Holsten’s, the New Jersey ice cream shop featured in the final scene of the legendary television series’ finale, paid tribute to Gandolfini by reserving the booth where he and his on-screen family filmed their last shot. Let’s remember Tony Soprano by watching this 2002 clip of Jim on Sesame Street, where he talks to Zoe about how it’s OK to feel scared sometimes. Hold me.

Via Jezebel:

Pageant hopefuls are no strangers to harsh public scrutiny – just ask Miss Utah USA, Marissa Powell. But most contestants don’t have to worry about being criticized for being too cute. At the 25th annual World’s Ugliest Dog Contest in Petaluma, Calif., freaky is fabulous. You’ll find everything from hairless, cross-eyed mutts with missing body parts to patchy, freckled pooches with potbellies and snaggleteeth. The Chinese crested, seen here, is an iconic “Ugly” dog with features often exhibited by this contest’s winner — but not this year.

                                           Pictured: a NOT UGLY ENOUGH DOG

This weekend, Walle, a “late entry” 4-year-old beagle-boxer-basset mix, won the crowd over with his gigantic head (ugly?), the hump on his back (ugly?) and the ability to sit upright on his butt (ugly?!). Like Potter Stewart, when it comes to ugly, I know it when I see it and I ain’t seein’ it. Sashay away, Walle. You’re too pretty for this game.

What do you get when you cross the egotistical prince of Hip Hop with a beloved stylistic filmmaker? Kanye Wes.

Molly Miley Cyrus’ evolution into full-on festival groupie/Tumblr chick is complete. Check out her new vid for “We Can’t Stop,” featuring cameos by taxidermy, a My Size Barbie, Pepto-Bismol blood, smoke bomb crotches and a hot dog piñata:

#WHATISHAPPENING

Noisey raises some “important questions” about the video since it is both impossible and futile to even form an opinion about it. All I know is Miley’s fervent ass shaking/slapping and non-drug references are making me totally uncomfortable. Just a few years ago I relied on older friends to explain drug stuff to me and now I’m feeling totally weirded out by Miley and her rolling (or whatever the term is now), twerking, thumb-sucking friends. Yet, I can’t stop…watching this freaky mess over and over!

Is your stockpile of Twinkies starting to dwindle? Fear not, Tallahassee, because select Hostess snacks are set to be back on store shelves July 15. Metropoulos & Co. and Apollo Global Management teamed up to buy Twinkies, CupCakes, Donettes and other Hostess cakes so we can continue to fill our bodies with preservative-rich baked goods for years to come.

The Steve Jobs biopic starring Ashton Kutcher is in theaters Aug. 16. Check out the new trailer:

Ashton’s Steve Jobs is legit but, so help me God, if I have to hear that Macklemore & Ryan Lewis song one more time…

Tightrope walker Nik Wallenda crossed a gorge near the Grand Canyon on live television Sunday, walking 1,500 feet above the ground on a two-inch cable, and didn’t fall to his death. Good job, Nik! Wallenda comes from a family of tightrope walkers — his great-grandfather Karl Wallenda, born in Germany in 1905, began performing at age 6. Nik became the first person to cross Niagra Falls on a high wire last June and Sunday’s stunt gave him the title as the first aerialist to walk directly over the Little Colorado River Gorge. There weren’t any harnesses, cables or safety nets — just a pole to hold for balance. Wallenda prayed loudly to Jesus throughout the 23-minute spectacle. At the peak of the gorge crossing, 13 million viewers tuned in either on TV or online, a staggering number compared to the 2.7 million who tuned into the game-changing Mad Men finale also on Sunday night (the series’ biggest audience ever). Why do people watch this stuff? It's kind of sick, even if there's a 10-second body splatter insurance delay.