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by Danny Cross 12.18.2008
Posted In: Basketball at 04:07 PM | Permalink | Comments (3)
 
 

WTF AK?

Andy Kennedy, were you hanging out at the Lodge Bar until 1 a.m. last night? Was your pervy looking “Director of Operations at Mississippi,” 31-year-old William Armstrong, trying to hunch on some rich girls into the wee hours of the night only to get his crackerish ass thrown out of the bar? Did y’all act like dicks to a cab driver?

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by Isaac Thorn 12.15.2008
Posted In: football at 01:59 PM | Permalink | Comments (2)
 
 

Many to Blame for Fantasy Football Losses

Fantasy football can make you feel like George W. Bush did when that guy threw shoes at his face. I think the only way to deal with not winning any money again this year is to blame the players on my team, the firearms they misused and my own draft day shortcomings.

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by Isaac Thorn 12.10.2008
Posted In: baseball at 11:49 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)
 
 

Remembering Glenn Sample

It's too bad you don't get to see your own funeral, because if you lived a really good life and had a lot of close friends it'd be a good time. Monday night a coworker and I headed over to the Fifth Third Arena for Glenn Sample's memorial service.

I met Glenn last year when I began working for Major League Baseball at Great American Ballpark, and like everybody else says, he was the nicest guy you could ever meet. He would write down people's names upon meeting them so he wouldn't forget their names later. Glenn wore many hats throughout his life, and his nearly 30-year tenure as Official Scorer for the Reds is what led me to meet him.

Glenn loved UC athletics. He has a street named after him on campus and is a member of the school’s Hall of Fame (and eight others). In some ways, he reminded me of Jerry Orbach's character from Law & Order in that he was distinctly from another era and knew a ton more than you. He grasped a great deal of the sort of knowledge and life skills which are timeless.

The only player who ever hated Glenn was Davey Concepcion. Apparently, Davey thought he had never committed an error as a member of the Reds. Not once. Sometimes Concepcion would come off the field, angered that he had been charged with an error, and offer Glenn his extended middle finger or another vulgar gesture. Others in the booth would say, "Glenn, I think Davey's really mad with you this time!" to which he would reply "No. That's Spanish for ‘I love you.’”

I remember when the Mets were in town last year and their catcher Brian Schneider came up to bat. Before he was done digging in at the plate, he had purposely kicked and muddied up the batter's box so that all the lines were pretty much disintegrated. Obviously, Schneider was doing this so that he could creep up an inch or two further than he was allowed when he was back there catching: an old veteran shady move that vets try to get away with all the time.

I can say this was the only time I ever saw Glenn get angry. He said, "He can't do that! It's against the rules. They should throw him out of the game for doing that."

Somehow, it made me realize how guided an individual he was, and that nothing could affront him more than breaking the rules.

Many people's funeral video slideshows would consist largely of beer-in-one-hand poses and other forgetful occurrences. What I found impressive the night of Glenn’s service was how many years were spanned during the slideshow, and not a single picture was of him sitting on his butt doing nothing. They were all hitting, catching, coaching, refereeing — action shots.

Perhaps that's why I was so stunned to hear of his death. When I worked the last game of the season (which was a makeup game vs. Florida scheduled on a Tuesday afternoon that Fox SportsNet didn't even broadcast), he was as lively and full of vigor as ever.

To see Don Zimmer get up on stage, weep, and compare Glenn's jump shot to Shaquille O'Neal's foul shots was something else. These guys played high school ball together on the West Side and have had their lives intertwine for more than 50 years since then. The same Don Zimmer that got so pissed off at Pedro Martinez that he tried to attack him was moved to tears.

Former UC wrestler Frank Shaut cried through his eulogy, and while he was speaking I glanced up to see a photo of him from his wrestling days. In the photo he looks like a guy who would beat your ass and not think twice about it. To see him so hurt by Glenn's passing was a testament to the kind of life he lived.

Memorials are never fun, but this one was educational.

 
 
by 12.07.2008
Posted In: football at 11:42 AM | Permalink | Comments (1)
 
 

UC Beats Hawaii, Gets Orange Bowl Bid

The UC Bearcats came from behind in the fourth quarter to beat Hawaii 29-24 and finish off an amazing 11-2 regular season. Receiver Mardy Gilyard, who graces the cover of this week's CityBeat, caught the winning touchdown pass.

UC will confirm its BCS bowl game — likely the Orange Bowl against Virginia Tech — this evening. [UPDATE: UC-Virginia Tech is official.]

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by Danny Cross 12.03.2008
Posted In: football at 04:45 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)
 
 

Recurring Theme: Suckiness

Last week Bengals owner Mike Brown sat down for a rare interview, obliging Enquirer reporter Mark Curnutte with a few short answers to some very basic questions: Why do the Bengals suck all the time? Where do you go from here? Do you want to try another new coach and see if that works?

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by Danny Cross 11.26.2008
Posted In: football at 02:44 PM | Permalink | Comments (3)
 
 

Stay Away From Us Mallory

Word on the internets suggests that our sports team-supporting mayor is going to publicly recognize the UC Bearcat football team outside City Hall today. From his botched opening day pitch (which was so hilariously poor that it landed him on national talk shows) to his recent vote of confidence in the Cincinnati Bengals, Mayor Mallory is way out of it when it comes to sports.

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by dannycross 11.20.2008
Posted In: football at 02:00 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)
 
 

Ocho Cinco Breaks Team Rule: Being Cool

The Bengals will be on national TV tonight taking on their big brother the Pittsburgh Steelers, and they’ll be without Chad Ocho Cinco because he done broke a team rule. What kind of rules to the Bengals have anyway? No winning? HAHAHA.

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by Danny Cross 11.15.2008
Posted In: football at 03:26 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)
 
 

Brian Kelly Tried To Ruin My Night ... Again

It happened again. This time it didn’t include cat chasing or yelling in the streets at 3 a.m., but Brian Kelly’s outrageous head coaching decisions yesterday threatened to ruin a perfectly good Friday night, just like they did last Saturday.

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by Danny Cross 11.14.2008
Posted In: football at 02:11 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)
 
 

Athletes Are Funny

Athletes and coaches consistently fill reporters’ notebooks with clichés and figures of speech, politicized and politically correct jargon that means nothing except that he or she respects the fans, the game and the opponent.


There are also players and coaches who consistently run their mouths, firing off arguments and declarations that distract their teammates and make them look like jackasses.


But for every hundred athletes too nervous to show their personal side or too conservative to speak out on controversial subjects or too stupid to shut up once in a while, there are players and coaches who are freaking hilarious and make athletes seem like real people instead of cliché robots and jocks.

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by Danny Cross 11.10.2008
Posted In: football at 04:09 PM | Permalink | Comments (3)
 
 

Brian Kelly Tried To Ruin My Night

I spent part of Saturday night lying in my front yard, refusing to come inside the apartment until I found a cat to chase. I was supposed to spend the evening celebrating a big important Bearcat football win, but because of ill-advised strategy and an impressive comeback by West Virginia, my celebratory evening turned into a terrified binge.

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