The Screen Actors Guild Awards were Sunday and I didn’t watch that low-budge mess, but here are the winners if you care. America’s girl crush, Jennifer Lawrence, nabbed an SAGy (?) for her role in Silver Linings Playbook (I know I’m late on this, but that movie is just great. Go see it.) After a non-wardrobe malfunction, JLaw accepted by citing the first job that got her the ubiquitous SAG card: an MTV My Super Sweet 16 promo.
Adrian Grenier (Vincent Chase to most but forever the Drive Me Crazy dude to me) tweeted big news for Entourage fans this week: the movie spinoff has been greenlit! Mind you, Entourage may follow in its sister Sex and the City’s footsteps by glossing over anything cool about the series and pooping out a 2-hour douchey bromance, but fans will certainly still flock to theaters to check it out.
Adapting TV shows
for the big screen
is nothing new — just look at Star Trek.
In Entourage’s case, a successful show on HBO for eight seasons, a movie will
provide one last chance for fans to see Vince and his buddies...and one last
chance to squeeze any last profitability from the series. But what about
adapting shows that weren’t necessarily successful on TV in the long term? Party
Down was an excellent Starz comedy from 2009-2010. Adam Scott, Lizzy
Caplan, Ken Marino and a bunch of other hilarious familiar faces from TV comedy
portrayed a crew of kooky caterers, each episode following them to a different catered event. It got a lot of late-in-show life love from Netflix viewers (because who
watches Starz?!) but was cancelled after two seasons. Ever since, there have
been hopes and rumors of a film version from fans and cast members
alike. While the crossover is still unconfirmed, here’s an awesome faux
trailer, made from clips from the series, with a horror twist:
And because everyone loves Mrs. Doubtfire, check out a creepily realistic look at what the family film would look like if it had taken a dark turn.
If you’re like most theater kids or women between the ages of 10 and 110, then you can quote Mean Girls and Les Mis like a champ and you will love this.
Tonight is a night
that myself and Lizbeans everywhere have been dreading for some time — the
series finale of 30 Rock. You can
read my full eulogy here, but I have to say while I’m happy the show is going
out while it’s still good (Tina Fey and Alec Bladwin both snagged
aforementioned SAG awards for their performances in the show), I’m really going
to miss my weekly dose of Ms. Bossypants.
From the beginning, 30 Rock has been
a writer’s comedy and I will cherish every quote that has been ingrained in my
brain over the past seven seasons (ex. "Live every week like it's Shark Week." - Tracy Jordan). On this momentous evening, I leave you with these
life lessons from Liz Lemon.
My feelings are best described by this Claire Danes supercut:
No, it wasn’t a somber night of the Obamas watching the GOP race progress. Blues Night brought B.B. King, Buddy Guy and Mick Jagger to Washington for a night of great performances! The trio, along with many other performers, played classics like “Let the Good Times Roll,” “I Can’t Turn You Loose” and “Let Me Love You Baby.” No word on whether “Moves Like Jagger” was on the bill (sorry for making that get stuck in your head). The highlight of the night? Obama singing a few lines of “Sweet Home Chicago.” The concert aired on PBS Feb. 27.
My Strange Addiction
It’s baaaack! This hot mess of a show seems like it would be an SNL spoof on ridiculous reality shows, but it really exists. And who really knows if these people are truly “addicted” to their behavior, or just do it for attention — either way, it’s some twisted entertainment. This season of the TLC "hit" features a man who is in love with (as in sexually attracted to) his 1998 Chevy Monte Carlo; a woman who can’t stop snorting baby powder; a woman with 38KKK-sized breasts addicted to (you guessed it) breast augmentations and plenty more sorry souls.
Alcohol on the Internet
You’ve probably heard of What The Fuck Should I Make For Dinner, a comically crass blog that randomly generates unique recipes (and if you “don’t fucking eat meat,” there are plenty of veg options, too). Thankfully, now you can find out where to get a cocktail after dinner, with Where The Fuck Should I Go For Drinks. Just enter your location, and the site gives plenty of good options to wet your whistle.
I also discovered an amazing blog this week (That’s So Michelle) and instead of gushing, I’ll just explain one thing: It has a category devoted to Jell-o shots. And I’m not talking nasty lime gelatin-and-Popov crap, this shit is gourmet! Michelle uses excellent ingredients and ingenious flavor combinations to create shots of pink lemonade, caramel apple and strawberry margarita, all served in hollowed-out fruits. Bask:
Frankly, I’m disappointed in myself for just now discovering “Chloe.” This web show stars Drew Droege as Queen Original Hipster, Chloe Sevigny. Each episode is set up the same: Chloe introduces herself and discusses her appreciation of something mildly timely (Valentine’s Day, Summer, Resolutions). She then goes on to discuss how she celebrates the topic, name-dropping all along the way. From the unusual accent to the discussion of obscure activities to the amazing wardrobe, it’s hi-lar-i-ous. Again, I realize this has been around the ‘nets for a while, but I have to share with anyone deprived of Chloe as I was. Enjoy!
Baby Kanye Meme
I’ve grown tired of this “everything’s a meme!!” trend happening, but sometimes
there are decent ones amidst the sea of “What my friends think I do…” And since
everything Kanye is generally entertaining, I present Baby Kanye: The Meme.
Design*Sponge’s "Living In" Page
can do no wrong, so I love everything about it. But I’ve always particularly
liked when blogs and magazines show me how to incorporate style from a movie
into my real life. D*S’ “Living In” page covers all the best scenes you want to copy, from Cleopatra to Clueless. Most recently, the site featured Twin Peaks, Almost Famous and Chocolat.
in grade school when there would be “Star of the Week,” and that kid would
bring in brownies and talk about his pet turtle and make a posterboard about his cool life? Beginners' Christopher Plummer is my Star of the Week. He’s proof that it's
never too late to do something awesome. So if you’re 28 and crying because you
hate your office job and you don't know what to do with your life, suck it up! CP waited 82 damn years to get an Oscar! Check out his charming speech here.
The Simpsons is definitely ingrained in American popular culture. Once an edgy, almost salacious TV show, Homer & fam are pretty mild in comparison to television’s modern-day exports — animated or otherwise. So it’s no surprise that Universal Studios announced a Simpson’s theme park to open this summer at its Orlando, Fla., resort with a full replica of the fictional town of Springfield. There’s a Krusty Burger, Kwik-E-Mart, Duff Brewery (yes, an actual brewery with beer created exclusively for the park) and, of course, Springfield would not be complete without Moe’s Tavern. Go here to check out photos and video from the newly-opened park.
Twitter Chitter: This week, everyone’s RTing Feminist Taylor Swift
(real name: Kristian Nairn), gentle giant and Bran Stark’s personal Segway on Game of Thrones, is actually a real 21st century person and DJ. Check him out!
If Hodor’s a DJ, Winterfell's a dance floor
Veneers, dwarf darts and chest beating — that’s what you can really look forward to going into The Wolf of Wall Street, Martin Scorsese’s new film based on the story of ‘90s stock market criminal type, Jordan Belfort. OK, that and Leonardo DiCaprio, Jonah Hill(‘s freaking veneers) and Matthew McConaughey.
Can Leo’s dance move at 1:34 be the new Harlem Shake?
The song playing in the background is off Kanye West’s new album, Yeezus, which came out Tuesday. Kanye, who apparently is a father now (apparently, because since Kim hasn’t produced so much as a bowel movement in the past decade without an accompanying press release, no one can really be too sure about this baby thing), promoted the new album with an American Psycho-inspired commercial — I am not calling this a short film — starring Scott Disick, Kourtney Kardashian’s baby daddy, and Jonathan Cheban, Kim K’s main butt buddy/occasional frienemy. Behold:
Before American Psycho fans
call blasphemy, author Bret Easton Ellis has come out saying he actually wrote
the spoof himself.
Mad Men’s penultimate season — arguably its darkest yet — wraps up this Sunday. Now that the merged agencies have agreed on a name and logo, they’re ready to go public! Check out this awesome press release (via Mad Men’s Facebook page) SC&P letter:
That was Claire Danes’ shout-out to her Homeland co-star when she won an Emmy in 2012 for her role on the show. Fans across Cincinnati will be able to holla at him too (not really, that’s rude) as he performs with the Cincinnati Symphony Orchestra Friday-Sunday. Sure, many know him as Saul Berenson on Homeland or the iconic Inigo Montoya from Princess Bride, but he’s a man of the theater, too, and this weekend he joins the CSO onstage for the first time since 1991. Read our interview with Mandy Patinkin here.
Krohn Conservatory’s annual International Butterfly Show opens Saturday, highlighting the butterflies of Morocco. The conservatory will fill with 16,000 colorful butterflies, floral displays and a hummingbird garden through June 30. Krohn is open 10 a.m.-5 p.m. every day; Admission is $4-$7.
Earth Day is technically April 22, but Cincinnati celebrates this Saturday at Sawyer Point. Enjoy live music, a fashion show of recycled materials and other family activities while learning how to get involved with green organizations and outdoor activities. The free event runs noon-5 p.m. Check out this week’s Green Issue for more information on native plant hikes, sustainable farms and outdoor classes, markets and events.
The Cincinnati Ballet promises one of the hottest parties of the year as they present Club B Saturday. The Cincinnati Masonic Center downtown will transform into a hoppin’ nightclub complete with cocktails, light bites and — of course — lots of dancing. There will also be a raffle with tons of great prizes. Tickets are a bit steep — $150 all-inclusive 7 p.m. admission; $50 tickets get you in after 10 p.m. — but the money goes to support this important local arts organization. Plus, how often can you say you’ve danced with a ballerina?
is Record Store Day and Greater Cincinnati is lucky to have four local
stalwarts to choose from. Support our local music shops by picking up a new
record as you enjoy live, in-store performances. Go here for details on how Everybody’s
Records, Shake It Records, Mole’s Record Exchange and Phil’s Music & Memories
By now you’ve heard about the Asiana Airlines Boeing 777 that crash landed at San Francisco International Airport the weekend before last. Three people have died as a result of the crash and more than 180 others were hospitalized for injuries. Unfortunately, when it comes to sharing the news of such catastrophes, many television networks are primarily concerned with breaking the story first. More than, say, getting the facts straight. Take it away, KTVU!
The San Fransisco Fox affiliate has retracted the information and apologized for the error, but Asiana confirms it will sue the station. It was recently revealed that a summer intern at the National Transportation Safety Board was the culprit who wrongfully confirmed the incorrect, racist — and, OK, some may say comical — names to KTVU. In other news, apparently the National Transportation Safety Board hires 10-year-old boys into its summer internship program!
So, to all our summer interns who get tired of fact-checking and entering calendar listings all day — sorry, guys. This is why you can’t have nice things.
Taking this whole mess a step further, comedian Patton Oswalt tweeted in response to the KTVU debacle:
Salon saw the tweet, gasped, clutched its pearls and unleashed an ever-updated story proverbially wagging its finger at Oswalt for being racist, even though his joke Tweet was completely within the context of the KTVU blunder. Check it out here.
Brooklyn-based writer Joe Veix submitted a hilarious post on BuzzFeed last week, only to have it deleted and then become banned from the site within minutes. What heinous article could he have possibly tried to publish? This awesome BuzzFeed parody. According to Bullett, Veiz said the community editor banned him for being “mean spirited,” but this shit is just plain funny to me.
Beyoncé performed a sold-out concert in Nashville this Saturday. In attendance were Real Housewives of Atlanta star Kandi Burruss (who actually wrote Destiny’s Child’s “Bills, Bills, Bills” and “Bug-a-Boo”),“Kid President” Robby Novack and yours truly! A Beyoncé fan since I first put The Writing’s on the Wall in my Walkman, the show was a true spectacle and — I’m not a bit ashamed to admit — a dream come true. Mrs. Carter served up around 30 songs that spanned from her Destiny’s Child days (“Survivor”) to her early solo stuff (“Crazy in Love,” “Baby Boy”) to her most recent album (“Run the World,” “Love on Top”) and her newly leaked jams. One of my favorite performances of the night was her new leaked-but-not-officially-released song that’s featured on a Pepsi commercial, “Grown Woman.” Queen Bey, her pop-and-lockin’ duo, “Les Twins,” (new dream: to have my own ambiguously named sidekicks!) and backup dancers got down and played around onstage to an Afro-beat in more fun, casual attire than the dramatic garb of the rest of the show. I love my Divayoncé, but it was a refreshing departure and a great song.
At one point, Bey hopped on a harness and flew over the crowd to a smaller stage in the back of the arena...
My very high quality, professional photo of this epic moment
...where she performed “Irreplaceable” — allowing a few lucky fans, including Kid Prez and one hoarse, hyperventilating mega-fan, to sing “To the left, to the left” — and “Survivor.” You best believe I did the choreography. Between acts, while Bey changed up her freakum dresses/weaves, they played these awesome short films — everything from Beyoncé as a broke-down princess to personal videos (everyone freaked when we saw her kiss Blue Ivy, and a shot of her with President Obama got massive cheers) to a remix of “Love on Top.” Her backup singers — "The Mamas" — and her entire band — which included drums, brass, guitar and bass — were all incredibly talented black women. They got plenty of bi screen shots and Bey shout outs throughout the show, which I thought was really cool.
In short, it was amazing — Mike, I hope you approve of my usage in
this instance! At the end of the night, Beyoncé asked for "A moment of silence, for Trayvon.” The George Zimmerman trial verdict had been reached at 10 p.m.
Saturday — it was likely most concert goers were unaware of what had happened (I had no phone service throughout the whole show, 8-11:30 p.m., which includes her opener, Luke James).
After the somber moment, Beyoncé sang “I
Will Always Love You” which led into “Halo.”
People are loving Weeds creator Jenji Kohan’s Orange is the New Black, the latest Netflix series now available in its entirety. Orange is based on the memoir of Piper Kerman, who spent 15 months in a minimum security women’s prison for money laundering and drug trafficking. Check it out!
In especially sad news, actor and singer Cory Monteith, best known as Finn from Glee, was found dead in a Vancouver hotel room Saturday. The coroner reports a mix of alcohol and heroin was the cause of death. The 31-year-old was open about his past struggles with addiction and sought treatment at a rehab facility in April. His girlfriend, 26-year-old Lea Michele, also stars in the hit show.
Why don’t you go to www.vogue.co.uk. With your arrow keys, hit up, up, down, down, left, right, left, right, B, A. Keep clicking A. Now feel less sad!
Syfy’s Sharknado touched down Thursday, proving the only thing more terrifying than a shark tornado is the revival of Tara Reid’s acting career.
The original 90210’s (I can’t believe I have to say
that) Ian Ziering also starred. The movie got such a response, particularly on
social media, SyFy is already planning a sequel for 2014, set in New York.
Anyone else notice Otis from The Walking Dead is now a vampire therapist on True Blood?
The Contemporary Arts Center is one of those few arts organizations open on Mondays (instead, Tuesday is their day off) Admission is always free after 5 on Mondays, but until Saturday, all admission is pay-what-you-can while the upcoming exhibits are installed. This is an interesting opportunity to watch as new works are brought in, play like a kid in the UnMuseum and shop in the always-fabulous gift shop. Saturday's opening party for the new exhibits will be quite a Spectacle, so look for details in this week's upcoming issue. Find ours and directions to the CAC here.
Check out Mike Breen's daily blog for tonight's live music lineup. And mark your calendars: Thursday is our annual Swizzle Soiree. Join us at PLAY for a celebration in conjunction with the release of our bar guide (on stands Wednesday). Cheers!
The Piccadilly Circus has set up its big top at the Bank of Kentucky Center and tonight is the last chance to check out the spectacle. Expect standard circus favorites like camels and elephants, high bar performers and clowns. Bring the kids early and check out a free petting zoo and elephant, camel and pony rides. Showtimes tonight are 4:30 and 7:30 p.m; bring $10 cash for parking.
ConnectedConversations continues its series of inspirational speakers tonight
with pioneer, publisher and producer Vy Higginsen. Higginsen’s story is marked
with numerous accomplishments – she was the first black female radio
personality to land a prime time gig in New York City, the first woman in
advertising sales at Ebony magazine, the first black woman to produce a drama
on Broadway and has founded a non-profit for young artists. Titled “Seeing No
tonight’s 7:30 p.m. show promises an
This is the perfect time of year to start a home garden, and tonight Civic Garden Center presents an organic vegetable gardening class. Tending a garden doesn’t have to be a pain – instructor Melinda O’Bryant will demonstrate how to care for your garden using compost, organic fertilizers and pest controls and weed suppression techniques. The program runs from 6:30-8 p.m. and admission is just $10; free for CGC volunteers.
University of Cincinnati’s College-Conservatory of Music hosts two free concerts at 8 p.m. tonight. Visiting composer from the University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign, Scott Wyatt performs with and CCM faculty and students in the Cohen Family Studio Theatre. As part of CCM’s Guest Artist Series, the New Continent Saxophone Quartet of the Sichuan Province, China plays Robert J. Werner Recital Hall.
The Civic Garden Center hosts many gardening and eco-friendly classes throughout the year. Tonight is the first installment of a three-part Master Composter Series. Participants who take all three classes in addition to completing 15 hours of community service will be certified as Master Composters. The entire series is free. Tonight's 6-8:30 p.m. class is Composting 101, instructed by Master Composter, Master Gardener and Founder of the American Compost Society, John Duke. Learn about how composting works, different systems to use, how to start and analyze your pile and more. Go online or call 513-221-0982 ext. 18 to reserve your spot.
Over in Clifton Heights, Baba Budan's hosts a night of open-minded, pride-filled fun. From 7-9 p.m., UC Alliance presents Open-Minded Mic, where all are welcome to play a song, perform in drag, recite poetry, do some stand-up – express yourself openly to a welcoming crowd! Afterward, Alternative to the Alternative Night takes over. Tonight's theme is Under Construction, fitting as Baba's is still remodeling after a car crashed through the entrance early Feb. 20. Come in your best construction gear, dressing in red if you're taken, yellow if you're dating or green if you're totally single and ready to go. There will be drink specials all night long. Find details here.
Super Bowl Sunday has come and gone, and what an emotional rollercoaster it was! Not only was the game neck and neck until the end, but viewers were taken through a gauntlet of tear-jerking ads between plays.
puppies? Check. Dead children?
Of course! It is the Super Bowl,
after all. It’s as if advertisers suddenly realized humans have emotions, and
that beer + bikini + kick to the crotch is not in fact the perfect formula to
lure every football fan. Check out more Super Bowl commercials here.
But there were some funny ads, too. Lindsay Lohan poked fun at her wreck of a life for Nationwide; Mindy Kaling learned what it was like to be invisible; and that Pete Rose Sketchers commercial aired, so that’s not embarrassing or anything.
Meanwhile the IRL Women
and Women First, the owners of Portland, Ore.’s feminist bookstore In Other Words, took over
twitter account to give a feminist commentary on the night’s events. Here are
Before we knew it, it was half-time, headlined by Katy Perry.
While she’s no Beyoncé (the disclaimer I give before complimenting anyone), homegirl brought it. Even people who are way too cool to listen to the pop star were all, “I’m not a Katy Perry fan, but that was a great performance,” which is hipster for “I liked it.” And if you were a fan of the amazing graphics throughout the show, you have a local company to thank! Lightborne Communications was behind all the 3-D animations and projections (they also worked on her recent tour). Read more about Lightborne’s involvement here.
The singer came out on a gigantic metallic man-powered lion, danced on a checkerboard come-to-life, served up early-Katy Perry retro beach realness (#leftshark 4 lyfe) and flew across the stadium looking like “The More You Know” star. Lenny Kravitz was already announced as a guest star, and he didn’t disappoint, performing Perry’s breakout single “I Kissed a Girl.” And oh, how I wanted to be that girl. Seriously, the man has not aged in the last 20-30 years. I wonder if he and Gwen Stefani both sold their souls to the devil around the same time in the ‘90s.
But Kravitz wasn’t Perry’s only guest! Rumored performer Missy Elliott surprised the audience with a medley of some of her top hits. It’s been a decade since she released any new music, so hopefully there’s more to come from Missy because the bitch can still put her thang down, flip it and reverse it.
There must be something in the air with pre-Millennium R&B musicians returning to the spotlight, because D’Angelo performed on Saturday Night Live last weekend at took us all to church while he did it. I never thought I’d like D’Angelo with so much clothing on, but he killed it (and owns the sophisticated baglady look).
SNL celebrates 40 years later this month (on a Sunday, which is weird). Tons of former cast members and hosts will appear: Dan Aykroyd, Jim Carrey, Jimmy Fallon, Jon Hamm, Jack Nicholson, Amy Poehler, Chris Rock, Adam Sandler, Justin Timberlake, Christopher Walken and so, so many more, including Eddie Murphy, who’ll be returning for the first time in more than 30 years.
Now stop everything, because the Game of Thrones trailer is here.
“Who said anything about him?” BOOM.
Jimmy Fallon took The Tonight Show on the road for the week, and some of the show’s most hilarious clips have resulted. First, after the Super Bowl, Fallon and friends did a live show from Phoenix. Will Ferrell and Kevin Hart — who watched the big game together and co-star in the upcoming Get Hard — threw down in a lip sync battle (“for their LIVES” – RuPaul) with Fallon. Watch the guys do either best Beyoncé, Katy Perry, Kelly Clarkson and more here.
On Monday, the crew traveled to L.A. So, naturally, Fallon opened the show with a recreation of the intro from The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air.
But the throwback fun doesn’t stop there. No stranger to Mark-Paul Gosselaar (who famously did an interview with Fallon as Zack Morris on Late Night), Fallon reunited the Saved By the Bell crew — Zack (Gosselaar), Kelly (Tiffani Thiessen), Slater (Mario Lopez) and Jessie (Elizabeth Berkley) — for a trip back to Bayside.
This is all great but where is Lisa Turtle (Lark Voorhies)?! I mean I know Dustin “Screech” Diamond was probably busy with his recent arrest and all, but what’s her excuse?
Finally, the movie event horny bitches across the planet have been waiting for is finally here. Folks have been talking about it — anticipating it — since 2012. Some scenes can’t even be shown on TV.
No, I’m not talking about that Fifty Shades bullshit, I’m talkin’ Magic Mike XXL. Try to keep your composure.