WHAT SHOULD I BE DOING INSTEAD OF THIS?
 
September 15th, 2011 By Danny Cross | News |

Morning News and Stuff

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Hamilton County Sheriff Simon Leis came out of his bomb shelter today to describe the Hell on Earth that will ensue should SB5 be voted down in November. Leis says a $7.9 million cut to his department will mean closing three of his 10 jails floors and releasing inmates early. In general, the sheriff says SB5 will make us all safer. OK, fine, we'll vote for it.

In typical Enquirer fashion, the newspaper responded to such worthy debate by posting a reader poll that includes the following choices: raise sales tax, restore Leis' budget or let him close the jails. One might prefer a third choice, something along the lines of “do something none of these cowardly mopes has suggested yet.” Or at least “other.”

A group of executives has a poll they'd like to show you regarding the pay of public vs. private-sector workers. Guess who is grossly overpaid, according to this collection of people who would prefer public employees make less so they can continue underpaying workers in the private sector? Correct!

Charlotte and Palm Beach County, Fla., are trying to steal our banana company. Don't their executives know how much nicer Indian Hill is for rich people to live than whatever shit-burgs Charlotte and Palm Beach have? As usual, fruitnet, the “global fresh produce portal,” has the story surrounded.

Streetcar opponents are again trying to get in the project's way, this time giving the Metropolitan Sewer District grief in an attempt to undermine construction. Only this time it's actually not going to work. From CityBeat's Kevin Osborne:

A proposal made today by a Hamilton County commissioner involving sewer work related to the city of Cincinnati's planned streetcar system won't harm or delay the project, city staffers said.

That's because the motion introduced by County Commissioner Chris Monzel, a streetcar foe, would only affect additional improvements sought by the Metropolitan Sewer District (MSD), said Chris Eilerman, the city's streetcar project manager. The city already has allocated $3 million of its own money to relocate manholes needed for the streetcar project and do some of MSD's other improvements.

If only the minimum amount of work needed to accommodate the streetcars is done, the city likely will have some money left over that it can allocate for other purposes.

Hilton Cincinnati Netherland Plaza pastry chef Megan Ketover made it through another round on Top Chef: Just Desserts. But it wasn't without controversy — judges made little kids eat Ketover's bourbon-flavored candy pops and then didn't like her Orange Cream Curd & Lavender Shortbread. Picky bastards.

Turkey says it can send its warships into the Eastern Mediterranean any time it damn well pleases.

This story suggests that Ron Paul is going to be a thorn in Rick Perry's side (figuratively — doesn't make sense literally).

If this headline and subhed don't explain it well enough, you'll have to read the story because it sounds complicated: "Synthetic DNA added to yeast cells, paving way for 'evolution' on demand: Scientists' feat could lead to better biofuels and vaccines, and is a significant step towards completely synthetic organisms."

There are apparently nude photos of Scarlett Johansson on the internet and she is none-too-pleased, threatening legal action against anyone who posts them. We're not going to do it — scared of lawyers. 

CityBeat's Jac Kern this Sunday will host an Emmy Awards live chat, right here on citybeat.com. Come on by, there will be popcorn. And maybe something crazy like this will happen!

 
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