What if the epidural doesn’t kick in?
It seems like in every TV birth (I know, I know), they get to the
hospital and it’s too late for the epidural. I don’t think I can
meditate the pain away like Beyoncé described while giving birth to Blue
Chances are if you’ve ever had trouble
buttoning a pair of jeans in a fitting room, someone has thrown this
adage over the door: “Don’t worry, Marilyn Monroe was a size 16” — along
with the next size up.
Finding yourself subject to foreign ogles
comes with the territory when you’re a female urban-dweller, I’ve
accepted. It’s part of the rhythm of every day, and it’s often more an
annoyance than an actual physical threat. But it’s a meaningful
Without thumbs we couldn’t hitchhike; give thumbs up; give a
handjob; use a hammer; use the full vocabulary of sign language; pick up
a cup; make a phone call; recreate Star Wars with only thumbs (see: Thumb Wars);
use a lighter; do an accurate Fonzie impression; text while driving; or
tweet without a laptop on the toilet.
Religious zealots are also protesting the DOMA
review because they believe gay marriage and gay parents will ruin
America’s children, despite the fact that there are plenty of straight
people out there — murderers, cult leaders, narcissists — who probably
shouldn’t have been allowed to commingle.
This happens to me like clockwork around
the start of summer, when the weekend air is pregnant with the fumes of
grills and charred hamburgers. You don’t really want it, I tell myself;
sometimes I’ll even linger in front of the meat displays at Findlay
Market, a stomach-twister on command: no, no, no.
Many parents attest that when your child is born,
some instincts just kick in. In nature, this is seen all the time.
Females are generally the primary caregivers to their offspring, but
there are plenty of species whose fathers don’t just hit it and quit it.
Those, the Internet has taught us, are some of our “triggers” — for me, right alongside The Joy of Painting with
Bob Ross, head massages and a whole Narnia of other untouched, weirdly
Although it’s a small step, the
inexorable link between women’s rights and the use of the bicycle has
forged a trajectory toward female independence throughout history, and
seeing the cultural implications and results of female bicycle use in
Saudi Arabia will be incredibly interesting — and perhaps mimic how
bicycles affected the suffragist movement here at home.
On April 15, Cincinnatians focused their
attention on a nearly 400-year-old city 800 miles from us because, in
the grand scheme of things, that’s really not so far away. We watched, listened
and talked about what happened to hundreds of people at the finish line
of the world’s most famous marathon.