Nefarious weasel takes time out of busy day to knock superconducting machine offline; Colorado gets high enough to come up with radical idea; washed-up liquor spokesperson brings bankruptcy and bad attitude to Coney Town and more.
In spite of its January
declaration of a new day, TheEnquirer’s latest offering — a show of support for tearing down the
Dennison Hotel building on Main Street — was a typical ode to the powers that be.
Here’s the perfect story for some
aspiring TV journalist passing through Cincinnati and eager for an
award-winning clip: Ask hospitals and other institutions/businesses why
they post their signs banning deadly weapons inside.
Dayton becomes first Ohio city to take stance against other states that are dumb; spawn of Donald Trump avoid having to vote for evil father; celebration of new soccer team's first win includes theft of team's banner and more.
State department advises ugly Americans to stay home and watch TV on Spring Break; John Kasich reportedly willing to start talking about being 'on fleek' and swagger'; bored with fucking up the government, tea party legislators leave office and more.
Pollution of America's waterways temporarily produces artificial beauty; Cowboys owner/noted medical genius sees no link between NFL and brain disease; God isn't the only sky creature who has no love for most of the human race and more.
Pope joins Instagram to the delight of online believers; GOP will not consider SCOTUS nominee or anything else Obama wants; scientists believe dogs are more intelligent than we give the little bastards credit for and more.
Republican group might need to hire one of them social media managers; Syrian refugees introduced to Western culture courtesy of furry convention; Trump revises Cincinnati trip fearing how tiny hands would look holding a coney and more.