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Motherboard Goose:Data File 2

0 Comments · Wednesday, July 12, 2000
Billy Gates Gruff For years and years, in a far off land by the sea, a wealthy merchant prince ruled a vast yet ever-expanding kingdom. But no matter how big the prince's kingdom became, he want  

Motherboard Goose (Data File 1)

0 Comments · Thursday, June 29, 2000
The PC, the Notebook and the PDA The personal computer, the notebook computer and the personal digital assistant were arguing about which was the most indispensable device in their owner's life. "  

Stop Thinking About Doing it and Do It

0 Comments · Thursday, June 22, 2000
Bye-bye, Miss American Pie, drove my Chevy ... Whoa. Check out Willie Loman at the newsstand there. Willie Loman? He's fictional. How's some a real guy look like a fictional character? I don't know.  

Love is One of the Answers

0 Comments · Thursday, June 15, 2000
"I can't figure it out," a friend said to me the other afternoon. "Sometimes it feels serious, other times I think we're winding down." She was referencing her current relationship. The guy she's d  


0 Comments · Thursday, June 8, 2000
In approximately 100 days, the premier sporting event of the quadrennium will begin: the 2000 Summer Olympics in Sydney, Australia. As always, we in the media are determined to give you the compre  


0 Comments · Thursday, June 1, 2000
The chip that powers my aging PC is to the chips powering the latest PCs as the rhesus monkey is to the bulbous-headed giant brain people of the 51st Century. My hard drive is definitely not giga-,   

Formal Requirements

0 Comments · Thursday, May 18, 2000
The cusp of summer is near, the beasts are in mad rut and a sweet scent of Clearasil fills the air. There can be little doubt -- prom season is upon us. Of course, this end-of-an-educational-era ri  

Addressed to Kill

0 Comments · Thursday, May 11, 2000
This week, columnist Bob Woodiwiss is away on hiatus (this time on an outpatient basis). The following are excerpts from his recent commencement address to the Class of 2000 at Myron College. MC is   

Black-and-White Whine

0 Comments · Thursday, May 4, 2000
"Can I see your license?" I get that question a lot. Partly because it's the start of my favorite sexual role-playing game, Naughty Out-of-Season Bonefisher Happened Upon by Unmerciful Game Wardenes  

A Rich Source of Advice

0 Comments · Thursday, April 27, 2000
You might know her as the non-drunk, non-indicted member of America's royal family, the Kennedys. Or as the not-quite-talented-enough-to-be-a-network-journalist network journalist. Could be you firs  

Putting the Logical in Neurological

0 Comments · Thursday, April 20, 2000
Ask anyone who knows me and you'll get the same two bits of advice over and over again: 1) Don't stand between Bob and a controlled substance; 2) Don't get Bob started on the subject of neuroanatomy  

A Most Celestial Body

0 Comments · Thursday, April 13, 2000
BOB GOEN: Good evening and welcome to Entertainment Tonight. I'm Bob Goen ... MARY HART: ... and I'm Mary Hart. Tonight's big story is the arrival of Jesus Christ in the city of Jerusalem just over  

Aging Grossfully

0 Comments · Thursday, April 6, 2000
By the time you read this, I'll be another year older. That's right, one more birthday come and gone. Most years, I pay very little attention to this event. This time around, though, I don't seem to  

"It's the Carnage, Stupid"

0 Comments · Thursday, March 30, 2000
LAHORE, Pakistan (AP) -- A Pakistani man who was convicted of murdering 100 children was sentenced today. The judge ordered Javed Iqbal to be strangled, in a public park, in front of the children'  

Laughing all the way to the data bank

0 Comments · Thursday, March 23, 2000
Welcome! This is the Official Year 2000 United States Census of Humor form for everyone at this address. By completing this brief questionnaire, you will not only be fulfilling your legal responsibi