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Whirlygig: 92: Out on the Town

When it rains, it pours on the dating scene

By Brandon Brady · August 27th, 2003 · Whirlygig
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Double the Trouble
All attempts to jumpstart my personal life appear to be working. It's amazing to me that new life has appeared on the horizon. It appears that the stars are in my favor to illuminate what was dark and dismal on the dating front. They say that things come in threes but I'll settle for a double as two bachelors loom on the doorstep of my day timer.

Last week I told about John who surprised me a tad with his moxie in the moonlight. All systems seem to be firing for him after that romantic interlude where I was more amused than taken with the moment. Luckily, I was able to talk him out of jumping in over our heads since it was only the fourth or so date and the water in the pool was approximately knee deep.

I told Cate over lunch at The Echo on Friday that he's downright smitten and then sheepishly admitted that I was less enthusiastic. She said that is par for the course. The less interested I am is the guarantee that he will light up the phone lines with inquiries as to when I'm free again.

"Don't get me wrong," I told Cate. "I like the guy well enough and he is easy to spend time with, but I can just tell he is more into it than I am. Do you think that I am leading him on by continuing to see him?"

"No, enjoy it. He is a big boy," assured Cate.

I'm not quite sure seeing as how he has been newly single only for the last year after a decade of marriage. I shrug my shoulders and figure plans for Labor Day are not a commitment but merely plans for Labor Day. After all, John should be casual in his relationships until more water is under the bridge in divorce land.

Ted is the other guy that networking with friends has produced and that still has me mystified. I have asserted that telling everyone you know that you are free and open to referrals works for a while. Who knew it would work for little ole' me?

Ted was a suggestion by my financial advisor. Personally I think he threw me Ted as a form of apology for not being able to better manage the little money he's supposedly managing. Yeah, it's a tough economy but are money managers resorting to fixing up their clients with other clients? In my case, I'm not complaining because, after all, I am in the market.

It seems Ted recently threw a crazy live-in girlfriend out of the house. I sympathize with him and agree she sounds crazy. In a way, it's strangely comforting to hear guys wax on about the ex and find out that they suffer more than a little when they are abandoned for another guy. However, is this good fodder for the first date? He apologized for getting off on a tangent when he walked me to my car so I chalked it up to an open wound and the strange directions conversation with complete strangers can go.

When Ted called Saturday morning to ask if I wanted to hit the Ohio River with him, I had almost forgotten his ex and only remembered the banana cream pie we had eaten at Trio's in Kenwood on Wednesday.

Since only yard work prohibited me from saying sure, it was easy enough to agree to being picked up on Hooter's dock later that afternoon. He said his friend has a nice boat and the weather was stunning. Maybe in the presence of friends his recent break-up would get less airtime or so I hoped.

Indeed, the boat was nice, the friends a diversion and the sunshine brilliant when I climbed aboard at 4 o'clock in the afternoon. We made a few passes up and down the river dodging the barges and other river traffic before deciding to grab a bite to eat at Bromley's. We docked along with other river rats and I was thrilled to be going to the bathroom where there was toilet paper.

The potato dish that was served along with a table full of appetizers was truly memorable though I was beginning to realize that Ted and I probably were going to be a short-lived thing. Turns out that we are just on different wavelengths that have nothing to do with the wakes of other boats. It isn't tragic and actually funny when the captain's girlfriend tells us that our zodiac signs are completely incompatible.

At dusk we part friends and I drive home to tunes that remind me of the more pleasant connections that linger in my heart. I realize that indeed it can officially be said that I'm dating again. But only in the safety of my mind can I admit that the third player in the mix is the one guy that I'm not yet over. No, he's not a current player. I don't see him or sleep with him anymore, but I miss the way we shared jokes and had the easy chemistry that comes with spending a whole lot more time together than an evening or a day.

I wish I could say it isn't true, but the toughest opposition for John, Ted or anyone else right now remains in my ability to leave the past behind me. While I might not discuss my last love relationship over lunch, the fact is that my heart is having trouble catching up to the rest of me.

-- Wendy Robinson

Radiohead Road Trip
Cathy and I haven't seen much of each other for the past month, so we decided to catch up with an eight-mile loop on roller blades at Miami Whitewater Park. The last time we tried to go roller-blading together, we had a communication problem and I ended up waiting at the park for her for about an hour before I gave up and did the trail by myself.

It turns out that each of us saw Radiohead this past weekend. I saw them at Blossom's near Cleveland, and Cathy saw Radiohead in Wisconsin. I've actually gotten used to having to travel to Cleveland, Columbus or Chicago to see more famous bands since they seem to bypass Cincinnati for some reason.

My trip to see Radiohead sounded a little bit more fun than Cathy's even though it started on an off-note. Shannon and I compromised on a departure time between noon and 1 p.m. the night before we were to leave. Shannon was not quite ready when I arrived at her house on Thursday, exactly at 1 p.m. I should mention. This gave me time to walk up to Riddle Road Market for our tailgating supplies: a six-pack of Harp's, a six-pack of Bass, peanuts, Chex-mix, and Sour Blow-Pops. Unfortunately I forgot to buy the one thing both of us would need for a four-hour driving trip to Cleveland: cigarettes.

Shannon and I both went separately to see Radiohead the last time they played Blossom back in 2001. We both had bad experiences getting to and leaving the parking lot at Blossom. We learned from those mistakes and arrived in the parking lot at Blossom at 6:30 p.m., nearly two hours before the opening band, Stephen Malkmus and the Jicks, was supposed to play. Since we had pavilion seats we hung out in the parking lot drinking our good and cheap beer and listening to our favorite CDs for 90 minutes before we decided to make the long walk to our seats.

For some reason I totally forgot how far a walk it is from the parking lot to the venue. It must have taken over 10 minutes which is a long time when you just finished your fourth beer without using the bathroom. When we first made it into the walkway at Blossom, Shannon was interested in checking out the overpriced concert T-shirts and posters. I stood there for about two seconds before I told her, "My bladder is in no mood to wait for you." I told her I'd just have to meet her at the restroom.

I paid $8 for 24 oz of Coor's Light and another $5 for a chicken teriyaki wrap that tasted like what I would imagine ass would taste like. Next time I'll bring a mini-propane grill to cook hamburgers with during the tailgating. To make matters worse, I wasn't able to drink more than half of my over-priced beer because it got warm so fast. I just had to throw away most of the chicken ass wrap because it would not stop dripping sticky teriyaki sauce on my hands and clothes.

Radiohead was just as amazing this time around as they were the first time I saw them two years ago even though I was sitting about 30 rows further way from the fourth row seats I had scored last time around. They are just one of those bands that just seems to have as much fun as their fans when they play.

After the show we decided to do post-show tailgating at my car to let the traffic die down before we tried to leave. I tried to show Shannon how to throw a Frisbee the correct way, which was a little hard to do with beers in our hands. After a not so friendly warning from a couple of mounted police officers patrolling the parking lot, we decided to pack it up and join the long line of cars still waiting to leave

-- R.L. Newman


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