What should I be doing instead of this?
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By Erma P. Sanders · July 26th, 2001 · Diva
I recently went to a bachelorette party, probably one of my last. My single friend supply is rapidly dwindling. It was your typical affair: a group of women eating, drinking, talking, dancing. It kind of got me to wondering about the whole history of this ritual.

I scavenged my local bookstore for information. I found plenty of material on suggestions for throwing said party. I even found a little Emily Post etiquette. But I could find nothing about the origins. When randomly surveying people about bachelorette parties, and the male equivalent of the bachelor party, everyone summarized it as a last fling before the wedding. Why haven't I ever encountered a bachelorette party that actually contains elements of a last fling.

The only thing that seems to have changed about the "batch," for short, party is it is not carried out the night before the wedding. Probably many a wedding has been ruined by a hung-over bride or groom. Thus the party is usually held at least one weekend before. If the batch party is supposed to be your last hurrah as a single person, why doesn't anyone do anything that signifies finality?

Every batch party I've been to, including my own, did not contain any activities that I discontinued after marrying.

I still go out to eat. I still go out to drink. I still go dancing. I still go out with just the girls and no spouse around. Why is this a batch party? It's not. It's just another night on the town. And, oh, it happens to fall a few days before a wedding.

I've heard rumors of getting together with a hooker or other willing sexual partner. Although I'm not certain that it's a good idea, at least it qualifies as a "last," that is, something you won't actually do again after you're married. Just partying with friends and members of your wedding party is anticlimactic. I mean what's the point? Certainly it is a nice tradition, but I feel let down whether I'm the bride or just an invited guest if something doesn't happen that truly signifies the end of single life and the beginning of the ball and chain.

I suppose each person has a unique view of which aspects of single life they will truly leave behind. Maybe hanging out at the dance club with the girls will become a thing of the past once you marry, and you want to do it one last time. Still, wouldn't you like to put a little spark into it? Maybe a big, hard-bodied stripper? Or walk up to hot men or women you will never approach again and give 'em a big old smooch. One for the road, as it were.

Since it has evolved into harmless fun, it stands to reason that the batch party isn't going anywhere. At least, I can beseech those of you still single who might invite me to your party to restore the real tradition of the batch party to its former glory: I'm sure it was just a blowout bacchanalia.

Do something wild. Jump out of an airplane. Have a orgy. Remember the first part of single is sin. Commit some while you can. Just don't forget to do it in plenty of time to recover for the wedding. And keep a first aid kit handy.



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