HOT: 24 Hour Arty People
The Flaming Lips have broken the world record for most concerts performed in multiple cities within the span of 24 hours. The new Guinness World Record holders hit eight cities in the U.S. South, where they performed at least 15-minutes (per the rules). The exhausted Lips closed out the day-tour in New Orleans and, by the time they were done, had about 20 minutes to spare. The record was previously owned by Jay-Z, who, to be fair, probably had a little help from that old fleet of Concorde supersonic jets he bought from France after they were discontinued.
WARM: Conspiracies R Us
It’s times like this that make me wish I wrote for the Weekly World News. The (imagined in my head) rivalry between Beyonce and Adele has entered its next phase and shit is getting serious.
After seeing all of the publicity Beyonce and Jay-Z’s Blue Ivy received upon birth, Adele recently announced that she was pregnant with her first child. Isn’t that convenient. We thought that was the most scandalous factor of the announcement until we heard that Katie Holmes was filing for divorce for Tom Cruise. At first we just figured it was because she saw him sing “Pour Some Sugar On Me” on film (most people save that kind of embarrassing shit for YouTube). But now our theory is that Cruise knocked up Adele because it would create massive PR buzz for Scientology.
COLD: Dive at Your Own Risk
Singer Randy Blythe of popular Metal band Lamb of God was arrested and jailed in Prague after authorities questioned him about his role in the death of a stage-invading/stage-diving fan at a May 24 Lamb of God concert. Blythe alleged shoved the fan from the stage and he fell into the crowd, hit his head on the ground and died from his injuries two weeks later (which is why authorities are just now considering manslaughter charges). No charges have been filed; Blythe was detained for questioning in relation to the investigation. At press time, he was expected to be released at any moment and plans to return to the States. Glad it didn’t happen in overreacting America — Congress would pass a law requiring all concert stages be at least 65 feet tall and surrounded by electrical fencing.