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Bass Medicine, MIA, and Swimsuits

By Mike Breen · February 7th, 2012 · Minimum Gauge


Let the Rhythm Help ’Em

Thumping Hip Hop bass isn’t just for annoying your neighbors anymore. Thanks to science, it’s now become a useful tool in the medical field. AllHipHop.com reported that researchers at Purdue University created “a new miniature medical sensor” implanted in the body that gets power from low-end bass sounds (kinda like Luther Campbell). The microelectromechanical system embraced Hip Hop after researchers tested a variety of styles and found the music’s bass frequencies were the most effective. Purdue’s research website explains that the device would help people “stricken with aneurysms or incontinence due to paralysis.” One would think the subsequent noise complaints would be a bit distracting, but maybe when the device gets low on power patients are instructed to attend a party at P.

Diddy’s for recharging.


Finger-Food For Thought

Eight years ago, modern technology enabled Janet Jackson’s right boob to become the star of halftime at Super Bowl XXXVIII (that’s 38, for you non-Romans). This year, thanks to the internet and Tivo, another body part stole the show. To the naked eye, Madonna’s Super Bowl performance was remarkable. But checking social media and online commentators 10 seconds after the performance revealed it was actually a disaster — Madonna is old, she may have lip-synced in parts and, worst of all, guest MIA raised her middle finger and almost said a bad word! The NFL and NBC apologized and blamed each other, and the predictable faux-outrage ensued. Though anyone with even minimal knowledge of MIA (a politically-minded rapper/singer) — who wondered why she’d agree to prance around in a cheerleader outfit in the first place – was probably more shocked she didn’t do more.


Swimsuit Issue Goes Indie

Several “Indie” acts are working with Sports Illustrated and becoming a part of the mag’s annual release of fresh masturbation material for minors — a.k.a. the Swimsuit Issue. Along with a Swimsuit Issue music festival in Vegas, SI has teamed models with various Indie artists (including Toro Y Moi, Hanni El Khatib and A-Trak) for the online and print editions. So lots of dudes with beards in Speedos for this year’s wank-fest? Alas, no — apparently only the models will be featured in swimwear. 



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