Last Knight on Earth
Finally, a cultural icon deserving of a "Sir" is getting knighted in England ... but we can't even call him "Sir." Sure, Elton John has done great work for AIDS research, but he also wore that giant Daffy Duck costume in concert. Bob Geldof organized Live Aid, but have you heard his solo albums? And Ian McKellen? Not sure what he's done for charity, but we suppose he was pretty great in Lord of the Rings. Hell, they've even knighted a soccer coach (Manchester United's Sir Alex Ferguson), so how prestigious of an honor can it really be? Perhaps the cultural icon most deserving of the honor is U2 frontman and tireless charity worker Bono. But a technicality has put the kibosh on things somewhat. Though he did receive an honorary knighthood from the Queen recently, because he is a "foreign national" (in other words, he's Irish) he is not entitled to actually go by "Sir Bono." The singer reportedly has no problem with that, saying, "You can call me pretty much anything you want, except 'Sir.' You can call me 'Lord of Lords' or a demi-god."
God: Not a Chili Peppers Fan?
As Karl Rove showed us recently with his embarrassing, awkward Hip Hop dance routine (which we proclaim as the absolute lowest point in Hip Hop music history) at the Correspondent's Dinner in D.C., sometimes politicians can let their hair down and have a good time (for better or worse).
So partisan politics would never interfere with a concert, right? Especially not something as constructive as Al Gore's global Live Earth concert series, which will raise awareness about global warming this summer on all of the continents. But Gore is finding out (again) that everything is partisan. Rolling Stone reports that permits for a concert in D.C. (featuring artists like Red Hot Chili Peppers) have been squashed twice. Most recently, a proposal to hold the concert on the lawn of the Capitol was shot down by Sen. James Inhofe (R-Pluto), who promised to stall the official resolution. But the initial site was D.C.'s Mall, where numerous concerts have been held over the years. The National Park Board, led by Bush appointee Dirk Kempthorne, said no to that proposal, too. The blog The Hill found out the Park Board's denial was because another event had been booked for the fest's July 7 date. The reservation is for an event put together by Anna Godfrey. On her cheapie Web site, Godfrey reveals that God spoke to her in a vision she calls T.O.U. (Together One Unity) and said, "We are nowhere near ready for the return of His Son because we are too divided." The site says the vision will launch on July 7 (7/7/07), because "7" is God's "number of completion." While Live Earth is expecting up to half a million attendees, Godfrey told Rolling Stone she anticipates between 5,000 and 25,000 people at her event (despite putting the expectant numbers at 100,000 on her application). So when scientists say, "The world will end if we don't stop polluting," it's a myth perpetrated by bleeding-heart liberals. But when God talks to someone, we give that person the keys to the park? Guess it makes as much sense as anything going on in Washington today.
Boys Might Cry
If you were to make a list of "Most Unlikeliest Collaborators," which fantastical teamings would you put on it? Paris Hilton and Psychic TV's Genesis P Orridge? Black Eyed Peas and Thurston Moore? How about Ashlee Simpson and Robert Smith of The Cure? That last one is actually happening (and, yes, we double-checked to make sure it wasn't an April Fools' Day prank). The vocally-challenged younger Simpson sibling is working with Smith, and they're not just sharing makeup tips. Simpson and Smith are reportedly co-writing songs for her new album, which also includes unlikely collaborations with Tim Rice-Oxley from Keane, interesting Alt singer/songwriter Kenna and macabre metallers Slipknot. OK, we made up that last one. A belated April Fools' Day to you.