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Mope Rock, New Beatles and Prog

By Staff · July 13th, 2011 · Minimum Gauge


Is Dog Meat Murder?

Mope Rock king Morrissey’s got something new to be sad about — and those seeing him in concert in the coming weeks might notice that his sweeping onstage hand gestures might not be so sweepy. The website True to You reports that the singer/animal rights activist was recently attacked by a dog in England, somehow causing a broken index finger. Morrissey — who recently told Pitchfork he has a new album ready for release but can’t find a label to put it out — had the finger examined in Sweden and has apparently decided that he will soldier on and perform the rest of the tour without the ability to point out to his handlers what kind of tea he’d like to sip in the dressing room before the show.


Dung Beatles

The U.K., when not obsessing over the News of the World phone-hacking scandal, is abuzz right now with rumors about Paul McCartney’s possible involvement in the next Olympic games, which come to London next summer.

According to NME, Macca is being coy but hinted that the whispers might indeed be true — he and Ringo Starr will perform at the opening ceremonies with a “new” version of The Beatles. Though right now trusting U.K. news sources is like trusting that Nigerian prince who sends you emails offering millions of dollars for your bank account number, The Sun suggested the roles of John and George would be played by the late Beatles’ sons (begging the question: Who gets the Lennon part, Julian or Sean?). There have been Beatles reunion rumors since the day the band broke up, so take it all with a grain of salt. Our money’s on a giant Dr. Who homage dominating the ceremonies.


Prog Shock

Every musician has a different “pre-show ritual,” be it a couple of “adult” beverages, prayer or staring into a mirror saying, “You, Axl Rose, are a genius talent, the most handsome person on Earth and better than Slash in every way.” Michael Todd, bassist for Prog/Pop/Punk band Coheed and Cambria, might have the most unusual: (alleged) armed robbery. The musician was reportedly heading to his band’s big gig in Mansfield, Mass., opening for Soundgarden when he allegedly made a pitstop at a Walgreens, showed the pharmacist a stick-up note on his iPhone (there’s an app for that?) saying he had a bomb, demanded OxyContin and absconded with several bottles of another painkiller (they were all out of Oxy). Charged with armed robbery and drug possession, Todd — whose bandmates announced he was off the tour after the incident — even made TMZ. If you’re the bassist for Coheed and Cambria, you know you’re in trouble when you appear on TMZ’s site — you’re either dating Paris Hilton or in really big doo-doo with Johnny Law.



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