A Boss Do-Over
If you were attending an esteemed university and ready to enter the job market, what would you do if some of your fellow students pulled a stunt that made your school a national laughing stock? If it’s New Jersey’s Rutgers and the stunt is paying a flash-in-the-pan reality TV star a shit-ton to speak on campus, you reach out to The Boss. To rid the stink left by a recent speaking engagement by “Snooki” from the Jersey Shore, several Rutgers students are trying to bring Bruce Springsteen to the school. Rutgers’ reputation took a hit when it was revealed that the, um, actress (?) was paid $32,000 for her Q&A session ($2,000 more than literary icon Toni Morrison received). Bruce has yet to comment on the “Let’s Bring the Boss to Rutgers!” Facebook campaign, obviously deep into negotiations to receive the same perks included in Snooki’s contract, like 150 cases of Watermelon Four Loko and $8,000 to cover that day’s supply of STD meds.
The Grammys have long been the target of more belittling, dismissive and angry barbs than the comment section on Rebecca Black’s YouTube page. Due to this year’s avalance of complaints, the National Academy of Recording Arts & Sciences announced some big changes. But the changes are like putting a Band-Aid on your diarrhea — nonsensical and off the point completely. The Grammys will get rid of or combine numerous categories, losing over 30 in the process. Some of the modifications aren’t completely ridiculous but most mean many deserving artists have no shot at being honored. And if you play a “niche” style, you’re Grammy-winning chances are now at Powerball-winner levels. Example: Best Hawaiian Music Album and Best Zydeco or Cajun Music Album are now lumped into the vague Best Regional Roots Music Album category. The moves make it clear NARAS is in this solely for NARAS and TV ratings. “Fixing” the Grammys requires better quality control, not quantity control.
Music: The New Pimp
If you regularly prowl your neighborhood
meat market for an easy hook-up, a new survey offers some tips that will
up your chances for a successful night of uglies-bumping. The first,
most crucial step — find out what songs on your potential playmates’
iPod. Dating site tastebuds.fm, which uses musical tastes to match
users, conducted the survey and discovered which artist’s fans are most
and least likely to “go all the way” on a first date. If Coldplay’s all
over your desired boy toy/gal pal’s MP3 player, you can quit while
you’re not ahead because, according to the survey, fans of CP are least
likely to quickly jump into bed with a new friend. The survey found that
Nirvana fans are your best shot for last-call salvation — though we
imagine that’s because the majority of Nirvana fans are disgruntled,
perverted men in their early forties that would hump anything with a
hole and a pulse. Except perhaps Courtney Love.