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Law Dog, B-Ball and Twitter

By Staff · June 2nd, 2010 · Minimum Gauge


Law Doggers

Proponents of Arizona’s “tougher” immigration law have defended their stance by yelling, “Have you even read the law!” As if having an opinion on a law is completely invalid if one hasn’t read the entire legal mumbo-jumbo that the majority of citizens are incapable of understanding anyway. Taking a cue from the apartheid-fueled boycott of South Africa decades ago, several musicians have joined a boycott of the state, refusing to perform there until the law is overturned. The “Sound Strike” participants include Zack de la Rocha of Rage Against the Machine, Conor Oberst, Cypress Hill, Kanye West, Massive Attack, Rise Against, Sonic Youth and, perhaps most damagingly, Tenacious D and Michael Moore. So, Phoenix fans of tired Parody Rock duos and documentary ilmmakers who, unbeknownst to us, apparently also sing (?), write your representatives, pronto!


King James Babble

The beleaguered New York Knicks are getting some help luring NBA free agent Lebron James to the Big Apple.

It helps to have your team in one of the nation’s Hip Hop hotbeds, as Jay-Z and Jadakiss have been vocal about their endorsement of the move, ighting Ohio’s campaign of “Hey, you were born here and we like you lots!” Jadakiss even released a throwaway song urging James to come to the Knicks. With lines like “You go hard in the motherfuckin’ paint/You the truth but the Cavaliers ain’t,” we can’t see how Lebron can resist, even if the President did strongly suggest a move to the Bulls would be good for national security (something about “If you stay with the Cavs, the terrorists win”). Meanwhile, the Utah Jazz has made its case by reminding Lebron that, down the road, they could help land him in the highest of the three levels of heaven. The Celtics reminded him of all the wicked keg parties in Boston.


Further Proof that Twitter is the New Bathroom Stall Wall

Rapper MIA recently responded to what she saw as an unfair profile in The New York Times Magazine the way a middle-school kid would respond to that skinny bitch Jenny DeMasko for having the nerve to wear the same skirt they both bought at Hot Topic together but swore they’d let each other know before wearing them, resulting in the most embarrassing day ever in the middle-schooler’s life — she tweeted the journalist’s personal phone number. Lynn Hirschberg — whose feature on the rapper was fair and merely pointed out some of the contradictions of MIA’s world view (not the be all end all for an artist, in any sense) — was relatively unfazed by the pouty stunt, saying most calls were simply looking to “hook up” with MIA (the tweet suggested it was MIA’s personal number).The Times is lucky George Bush predated Twitter or else the entire staff would have had their numbers (and probably some hilarious nicknames) made public.



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