“I’d pull up behind them, put on my lights, then I’d go over my intercom, ‘I authorize you.’ I used to do stuff like that all the time.” On stage Armstrong likes to say things he thinks other people are thinking but are too polite to say so. Inspirations run the gambit from work to family, with a fair amount of embellishment. “My son just graduated from high school,” he says. “He’s going to college at the University of Texas. He’s very smart. (On stage) I make him sound like he’s lazy. I say, ‘I don’t know what I’m going to do with him. He wants to be a garbage man because they only work one day week.’ ” Armstrong performs Thursday-Sunday at Go Bananas Thursday-Sunday. $10-$15. Get showtimes, tickets and find nearby bars and restaurants here.