Not too long ago, someone coined the term "celebrification." Actually, I believe the phrase was,"the celebrification of America." Everybody wants to be famous. Everybody wants to be rich. I accept that as an axiom, or at least a solid rule of thumb.
Over the past two years, there's been a new process to manufacture celebrities: Reality TV. It's really not a new concept. Networks have always loved any type of programming that didn't involve paying high-priced actors and actresses. Game shows, sports and news programming traditionally took on this role. Now that pie has been filled with programs like Survivor, The Mole and the ill-fated Who Wants to Marry a Multi-Millionaire?
These shows have the byproduct of newly minted celebrities. Critics -- myself included -- have been quick to hammer these folks. When Survivor II: The Australian Outback debuted, my first thought was, "We're going to be saddled with these nitwits for longer than the three months that the program is supposed to air."
But by the time they had folded up the tents in Oz, I was turned around. As expected, the cast wound up on talk shows, commercials and even Hollywood Squares. About the same time, Colleen Haskell from the first Survivor saw the release of her film in which she co-stars with highly unfunny SNL alum Rob Schneider.
That's when it struck me. Is Haskell's road to celebrity any less valid than, say, Katie Holmes? Holmes sent a videotape to producer Kevin Williamson. So impressed was he, that he put her in the cast of Dawson's Creek. More power to her, but she didn't have to sleep outside on a tropical island, eat rats and look at Richard Hatch naked. Yet more people are inclined to beat up Haskell for being in a movie and never lay a glove on Holmes.
Another criticism has been that America was forming opinions on the Survivors without really knowing them. Yet, we do that all the time. Quite honestly I'd rather see Elisabeth Filarski sitting in one of the Hollywood Squares than Kathy Lee Gifford.
Survivor Jerri Manthey has appeared on the CBS soap opera, The Young & The Restless. Big surprise: She's awful. However, TV and movies are filled with bad actors who clearly got roles based on factors having nothing to do with talent.
Some have greatness thrust upon 'em ...
Nepotism is still the leading way for the untalented to become rich and famous. Certainly a lot of gifted performers have had famous relations. Nic Cage and Sean Penn spring to mind. However, more often than not we're left with the likes of Melissa Rivers, Peter Funt and Tori Spelling. If Tori had spent a few weeks in the Outback eating mango worms and sleeping in mud, I might have a better appreciation of her abilities.
Becoming a celebrity, though, is a gamble. Rick Rockwell and Darva Conger took a chance and the whole thing blew up in their faces. That was, in fact, far more entertaining than the show that deposited them on America's pop culture doorstep.
Is it shallow to want to be rich and famous? I hardly think so. Ideally you'd like to become rich (or at least comfortable) doing something you enjoy or are good at. There are a lot of advantages that celebrities enjoy, and to the fan/viewer the positives would seem too far outweigh the negatives.
It's a wonder more people aren't irritated when celebrities turn up on Entertainment Tonight or Access Hollywood or in the pages of People and start whining about how hard they have it and how difficult it is being a celebrity. Hey, Wal-Mart is hiring. And that brings up an even better question: Why are people more irritated when the bag boy at Kroger's starts bitching, even though he probably has a better reason to complain than the stars of some dopey sitcom?
It may just be a matter of time, though, before he's plucked from the checkout line and sent into America's living rooms on some future installment of Survivor or The Mole. Angel star David Boreanaz was discovered while walking his dog for crying out loud.
Now if you'll excuse me, I have an audition tape a need to send out.
